Last year I went to a haunted house for my birthday. I always like being in the front and getting scared first, so I led the group.
We enter this dark area, like a maze made of wood, so naturally, I put my hands out to feel where I'm going. It was totes pitch black, couldn't see a thing.
So I'm feeling my way around, when all of a sudden I hear, "you just touched my d*ck."
The monster guy totally broke character and started laughing. And I touched a monster's *****.