9. That's inconvenient to say the least.
Decided to only speak English to me in fear that I would struggle in school.
Now I only know one of the four languages my parents speak and ' the one they are the least proficient at.
I can't even communicate with my own parents. I can understand them fine, but I can't speak it.
10. Do your research first.
My mom was absolutely bananas over dental health. Apparently all of her teeth rotted out of her head as a child. Rather than blame the fact that she didn't brush, she focused in on the lack of fluoride in the drinking water at the time, and blamed that. When she had my brother and then me, she realized that we had well water and well water doesn't have fluoride in it. She went nuts trying to find a doc that would give us a script for fluoride. She finds one and he says to give us one drop once a day.
She determines that's not enough and forces us to take 7 drops each twice a day. My brother and especially me had a lot of mysterious ailments growing up. As an adult I'm super short, my teeth are funny looking, and my bones are soft. I got arthritis at very young age. My brother has some issues, not as bad. Come to find out it's chronic fluoride poisoning. She poisoned us with fluoride.
Not the dumbest thing, but the first thing that comes to mind: when I was learning how to ride a bike my dad thought it would be a good idea if he tied a chain to the bike and ran along side me. Not sure what he was hoping to accomplish, because it offered zero support, but he did it anyways.
The idiocy really wasn't that obvious until I finally got a handle over riding and started to speed down the sidewalk. My dad couldn't keep up, and as I kept going he fell behind. He never let go of the chain, so I got yanked off and smashed into the ground. It was just a bad idea, but we laugh at it now.
12. You only harm them when you undermine them.
My mother forced me to cheat through the entirety of seventh grade, using copies of all the assignments that she had found (in a previous seventh grader’s binder). She would berate, cajole, and demean me anytime I objected, seriously undermining my academic self-confidence. I was a good student before that, too.
I grew a backbone before eighth grade, and told her throughout that year that I was still cheating as she'd continually demand. I didn't tell her until midway through 9th grade that I was doing my own work, at which point a whole new battle began as she wanted to "review" (aka, completely redo) all of my assignments.
I'm not sure why she thought it was a good idea. Thankfully, I was a really good student, so I learned even without the homework, but it definitely made academics harder for me. It also seriously undermined my self-confidence, though that's only the tip of the iceberg in that way. My parents demanded complete control of my life, and did whatever it took to keep it.