'I Know How You Got Pink Eye.' The Most Unprofessional Things Doctors Actually Said.

'I Know How You Got Pink Eye.' The Most Unprofessional Things Doctors Actually Said.

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"First, do no harm." That's the beginning of the Hippocratic oath. So these docs were on shaky ground riiiiiiight out of the gate.

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This piece is based on a Quora Question. Link on the last page.


1/11. When I was 19, I went to see a gynecologist at a local community clinic. During the exam, she noticed that I had stretch marks on my abdomen.

"Have you ever been pregnant?" she asked me, to which I replied, "No."

"Are you sure? Because you look like you have stretch marks, and stretch marks only come from pregnancy."

Any idiot knows that stretch marks don’t always mean you are/were pregnant. Truth is, the stretch marks were from fluctuations in my weight. I left angry.

-Clare Romund

2/11. "I am in so much pain that I wish I was dead. I cannot eat, I cannot sleep and I need help," I told my dentist. One side of my face was broiling in pain.

"The problem is in your mind, nothing is wrong with you," said my dentist, as I wept in excruciating pain. "I’m sure it’s just stress."

I begged. I pleaded. He told me I was overdramatic and sent me home, where I writhed in pain.

Happily, I babysat for a family where the dad was a dental surgeon as well. And when the pain got too bad, I called Dr. Levine and basically said I need help or he was going to need a new babysitter, since I couldn’t live like this. Dr. Levine told me to come in first thing in the morning.

When I got into the chair, he took my hand (and I do not like being touched but I was almost limp with pain) and said "Elke, I swear to you, I will not allow you to leave until you are better."

And he kept his promise, and found an enormous cyst that my dentist had overlooked. He drained it, cleaned it and patched me up. He then called my dentist and shouted at him. Felt good.

-Elke Weiss

3/11. "We need to get you started on birth control," said Dr. B. the man who’d delivered my baby, Jacob. (continued...)


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