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Doctors do the best they can to keep the people in their communities as healthy as possible. It doesn't really help, though, if those patients don't even know the most basic facts about human biology. Even some of the basic things, like drinking water, seem to be a challenge to some people.

Everyone knows there are some really nutty people out there, but these folks take the cake! We found a collection of hilarious and ridiculous stories from doctors that will leave you to wonder how some of these people remember to breathe.

Well, It Didn't Say In Was UNSAFE
Well, It Didn't Say In Was UNSAFE

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She sticks an end of the plastic bag in the kid's mouth, saying, 'This is the only way she stops crying.'

The nurse and I share a look and immediately order an emergency x-ray on the kid's stomach. Turns out, she had ingested a good amount of these bags and it was blocking up in her stomach. It's a big deal; potentially life-threatening.

When we confront the mom about her baby feeding habits her only words of defense were, 'Well I checked all over the bag and I couldn't find anything that said non-edible.'"

Dentists Have To Deal With Some Pretty Crazy Problems
Dentists Have To Deal With Some Pretty Crazy Problems

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"Dentist here. Things I've had to explain to parents:

-Milk CAN cause cavities.

-Don't put your kids to bed with a bottle with Coke in it. They then switched to Diet Coke...

-Don't wiggle out your permanent teeth just because the tooth fairy will give you money. There was a little guy, probably 8 years old or so, who had wiggled out his four lower PERMANENT incisors (front teeth) after wiggling out his four baby teeth in the corresponding spots because his family made such a big deal about giving him money from the Tooth Fairy. They were in my office asking when the new teeth would be coming in...

You can't brush cavities away with toothpaste or any of these new Internet fads (oil pulling, honey, chocolate). Once your cavity is deep enough, it needs to be fixed by a dentist.

Fluoride isn't poison any more than table salt is poison. Small quantities are good for you. Anyone who tells you otherwise has been lied to and believed it."

Why A Pre-Teen Boy Was Prescribed...The Pill?!
Why A Pre-Teen Boy Was Prescribed...The Pill?!

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"My dad is a pediatrician. He told me the story of a teenage boy (around 13 years old) who was referred to him. When he asked him if he was on medications, the boy's mom pulled out some birth control pills. Apparently, his family physician suggested birth control as a way to treat his acne.

Yes, you read that correctly. A licensed doctor told a teenage BOY that was just going through puberty to take female hormones as acne treatment. I think he had been taking them regularly for the past year."

What Do You Mean, He Washes It After Every Use?
What Do You Mean, He Washes It After Every Use?

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"I had a patient come in for an STD check. She was very upset and continued to tell me that she only had one partner. Progressing through my assessment, she further divulged that even if he was sleeping with other people, it shouldn't matter 'because he uses protection every time and he makes sure to wash it thoroughly after every use.' I asked what she meant when she said he washes it after every use. She explained that he washed the protection with hot water and soap before he used said protection again..."

He Swore He Was Taking His Inhaler
He Swore He Was Taking His Inhaler

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"I saw a patient for a follow up after three ER visits in as many days for asthma. He was from another country, so this was the first time I ever met him.

His lungs sounded absolutely terrible, but he swore he was taking the inhaler every 2-4 hours with no relief. This raised suspicion to me, as the same medicines are working in the ER. I asked him to show me how he used it. He held it about a foot away from his mouth and did two puffs into the air and swallows.

I felt really bad, he had never received any education about his illness or medications."

A Lifelong Infection
A Lifelong Infection

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"A woman came to her OBGYN for an exam as she had an infection of some sort.

The doctor did the exam and asked the usual questions, 'Are you active with your partner,' etc, and nothing seemed to obviously be the case. At some point though, the woman lets slip that she's sick and tired of dealing with this infection that she's had her whole life.

Concerned, the OBGYN asked her to explain and is left speechless since the disgusting reasoning behind this woman's infection could have easily been avoided.

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