I know, I know… technically we already have “Fantastic Beasts”, which exists in the U.S. in the 1930’s or so. But just for fun, let’s pretend that the Harry Potter book/movie series takes place in America in the 90’s. Just let that thought sink in… that would change A LOT. Britain is quite different… because ‘Murica.
People shared how they thought Harry Potter would change if it had taken place in America, and their ideas are hilarious. Check it out!
Butter beer wouldn’t have butter.
MrMathNerd
Most Quidditch players don’t know anything about magic, nor do they care. They just came to Hogwarts on a sports scholarship.
RadicalPoopParticle
Hagrid would live in a trailer.
phatblackdude
They’d play a completely different sport but still call it Quidditch.
bschmacker
Hogwarts would only be about 75 years old. And it was probably renovated in the 90s.
Brenda_Butler
Harry and Ron would have been shot down by the Air force if they tried flying that car over D.C.
irishmickguard
Voldemort would’ve been shot about 17 times all those years ago when he broke into Lily and Jimmy Potter’s house. About a 2 page book. More of a leaflet, really.
kyledwray
The Weasley residence would be mobile homes stacked up and magically held together with tarps and duct tape.
Aboutsmokey
There would be drive by magic attacks in the hood. In the lower class areas, the kids would ride mops, and even swiffers, and the rich kids would ride Dysons.
2GoldDubloonz
He would live in a “closet” and not a “cupboard.”
upandcomingvillain
Westboro Baptist Church would be protesting outside of Hogwarts with signs saying “God hates Wizardry”.
illBoopYaHead
#NotMyHeadmaster
HotsoupTheMighty
There would likely be a Hogwarts school massacre at some point…. Followed by Hufflepuff Massacre deniers.
Daimo
Getting to school would be a lot more involved than “drive to a train station and sit on a train all afternoon”, depending on the state you lived in.
The Dursleys would be stereotypical rednecks/hicks/deep Southerners.
Azkaban would be run by a private entity and be located on Alcatraz.
PlanetaryGenocide
Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans would have a lot of corn sirup and added sugar in it.
RudegarWithFunnyHat
Hogwarts meals would be deep fried food and nothing else.
tlst9999
The most common pets at Hogwarts would be dogs and carrier eagles.
blueninja268
Harry is said to be average looking but is clearly described as objectively hot but the reader is supposed to pretend they don’t see it.
Anndgrim
Dumbledore is a manly man’s man. Probably in his 40s or 50s… and he’s hot.
ChimpZ
Harry would have ended up with Hermione.
The_Unitologist
There’s a serious lack of job prospects for wizards once they graduate from Hogwarts, and they’ll be paying off the student loan debt for half their lives.
Leigh_Lemon
Most of the book would be Harry saying “umm” instead of “err.”
dilemma07
“You Be a Wizard, Dawg”
poopellar
The Weasleys’ flying car would be a 1965 Mustang.
TheRickiestMorty
Due to security checks you need to arrive 3 hours early to catch a train at platform 9 & 3/4.
Weep2D2
If you can’t get into U.S. Hogwarts it’s no big deal.
You can go to its for-profit Caribbean counterpart for four times the price.
TheFire_Eagle
You would have a group saying that you have a right to know the Avada Kedavra spell to protect yourself. Then you’d have another group saying that the Department of Magic needs to control who knows it because every other country does this and they have less Avada Kedavra murders.
HarrysonTubman
“Yay! I got a acceptance letter to [American Hogwarts] now I just need a $150,000 wizard student loan…”
CrossFox42