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1. The snowblower and a bad injury
I recently moved into my first house.
We had 2-3 blizzards in row last month. After it all settled down, I went to dig out my car. I start stacking snow on either side, so that I don’t have to carry snow around the car too much. About halfway though, I hear a woman yelling at me. I see my elderly next door neighbor standing in her doorway in her pyjamas. I assume that she must be in some kind of trouble, so I head over to her. She starts cursing at me and telling me that where I’m placing the snow (on my lawn and on the side of my drive way facing her property) is actually her property. I look at the snow, look back at her, then at the snow again, and tell her that I respectfully disagree and to have a nice day.
The next day I’m at work and get a call from one of my neighbors across the street. Turns out that my next door neighbor bought a brand new snowblower and is now filling in all the shoveling I did with the snow from her driveway. Great.
I get home and the driveway is halfway full of snow, no big deal. I also notice that the snow blower looks like it was just abandoned in the middle of my neighbor’s driveway. So I talk to my other neighbors and it turns out that my neighbor attempted to use the snow blower, but was too physically weak to push it, so she ended up injuring herself and had to take an ambulance to the hospital.
2. The annoying electrical issue
My dad had a neighbor when he was young that played his radio loudly all day, even when he wasn’t home or was gone on vacation. Every time he left the house and his radio was still on, my dad would go and trip the circuit breaker to his condo.
One day he sees my dad, who was an electrical engineer, and asked him why his breaker kept tripping – was it faulty wiring? No, my dad explained, the loud radio was probably just putting too much strain on the circuit when left on all the time. My dad suggested he should try turning it down or off when he wasn’t home, and see if that fixed it.
So the man tried it, and surprise surprise, the circuit breaker stopped tripping! He was very thankful to my dad for helping him with that annoying electrical issue.
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3. Time to stop helping the ‘falling lady’
My neighbor is an overweight middle aged woman that seems to have a bad knee only when my kids are outside in the summer. If they are playing in my fenced-in back yard, she’ll pretend to fall down so they can help her up. I went from “Kids, you should help her, that’s what neighbors do!” to “She fell AGAIN? It seems like she only falls when you guys are playing. She doesn’t fall when I’m working in the garden.” to “If she falls again, come get me.” When I started saying that, she seemed to be able to get up pretty quickly. I had to go over there in August and tell her that I can’t have my kids helping her get up anymore, they are 7 and 8 years old and they can’t give her medical aid.
I get that she is probably lonely, but 3 or 4 times a week, I’d hear her yell “Kids, Kids! help me up, I fell AGAIN.
4. Neighbor got busted!
I had a problem with a neighbor who drove over my lawn with his ATVs and damaged the grass/shrubs. He said he’d pay for damage but that never happened and he kept doing it.
So I put my huge trailer across their tracks to block their path.
They went around it.
I put up two other barriers that they also drove around.
So I found this huge branch that had fallen in the woods between our properties and dragged it across to cover the third path they were making across my yard.
But the branch got caught on a cable.
What is a cable doing over the lawn instead of properly buried?
So I called the cable company to have it buried. They said I was the only registered client on that box and to disconnect it.
So I did.
After the weekend, my neighbor came by, angry at me for disconnecting his cable. He yelled he was going to call the cops on me.
So I left. I got a call from the cops. Cops asked if I disconnected cable because of the ATV issue.
Interesting, I wasn’t even going to mention the ATV issue, but my neighbor already did.
So long story short, the neighbor got a warning ticket for trespassing and admitted to stealing cable.
I took an offer on my house that very day and moved.
5. The entertaining neighbours
Couple that lives across the hall from me fights often and loudly. One night, the girl found something on the guy’s phone that she found objectionable (either porn or evidence of cheating, either way she was yelling a lot) so she throws his phone off the (2nd floor) balcony onto the concrete walkway below where it shatters. Guy then goes back inside grabs her phone and does the same.
Moral of the story is: an iPhone for an iPhone makes the whole world entertaining for the neighbors.
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6. Living next door to a genius
My constantly drunk neighbor came up with the brilliant idea that he could collect the leaves in the stone parking lot with his snowblower!!! He duct taped a plastic garbage bag over the discharge chute, and off he goes. It actually inflated the bag for a few moments until the stones started flying. He broke three windows on his garage door and splattered a bunch of cars in the lot. I couldnt stop laughing. I could write a book on all the stupid things I have seen him do.
7. Not the building managements fault
We lived next to this big guy in an apartment building (front doors inside a hallway). Now, he was a nice enough guy, but he was always cleaning a puddle up in front of his apartment every other day. We’d always ask him, if everything was alright, and he’d talk some incoherent crap about how he hates management.
So, out of curiosity, I asked management when I happened to be in the rental office, and the lady rolls her eyes and says, “This idiot fills up his tub to the brim, and sits in the tub. The water, of course floods his entire apartment, and comes out into the hallway, and he has the nerves to blame us somehow!” I pretty much said, “geez, sounds rough” and scurried on back to my place. If the tub story is really the truth, this guy must be dumb as rocks
8. Dont be mad at me. I own this!
I own about 8 acres. The house next to me has a right of way drive that goes through it. A couple bought the house about 10 years ago. One day they were down near the mailboxes planting some plants. I went down and very nicely told them that what they had done was fine but in the future before they do anything on my property they need to ask me first. He argued with me that they had rights to all of the property on 35′ of each side of the right of way. I explained to him that this just wasn’t true. They haven’t spoken to me since and won’t even return my wave when I wave at them. If they want to be mad at someone it is the agent who sold them the house, not me.
9. The teenage scammers
We have a grandma next door who is raising her 3 grandchildren. They are complete teenage idiots.
They got in trouble for stealing from our neighbors. The kids would offer to cut their grass and ask to use their bathroom when they were done. Then they would steal medication from the bathroom.
It was extremely obvious who stole medication. They pulled this scam up and down the block. Wasn’t too hard to put it together.
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10. The loud exchange
I live on a 50+ acre New England farm. About 2/3 of it is wooded.
After I’d been here for about a year I was walking the boundary stone wall, about 10′ on my side of the land.
From a neighbor’s yard I hear a bellowing voice. “YOU’D BETTER NOT BE ON MY LAND.”
I replied “I’m not. I’m on my own land.”
He yells back, from somewhere in the trees on his side “JUST SO YOU KNOW, NEVER STOP FOOT ON MY LAND.”
Me: “OK, we’ve got a deal. And you stay off mine, OK?”
I hear a grunt.
Then I ask “By the way, is this your deer hunting tree stand on my side of the wall?”
At which point he exploded “THAT STAND HAS BEEN THERE FOR TEN YEARS!
11. A terrible liar
Neighbor has a teenage son, 2 years my junior who’s an idiot. Got a used car for his birthday and decided to paint it neon green. Okay…
One night he comes home, drunk, and proceeds to crash into my dad’s car parked outside. Decides to hide it (poorly) and the next morning, claims it wasn’t him. We probably would have believed him had the damage on my dad’s car not had a neon green paint swap to it.
12. Lets make it easier for the thief
Neighbour after someone had attempted to steal his bike and being advised by me to get a better lock, proceeds to save his time by not locking his bike up at all but balancing the lock so that it looked like his bike was locked up unless you actually looked at it for a few seconds. I warned him that someone had already tried to steal his bike and that it wasn’t really clever leaving it unlocked like that he says “I promise you, I’ll lock it up, why he’s promising me anything I have no idea I was just being neighbourly. He then leaves his bike unlocked like that for about a week until someone finally stole it. I guess it did save the thief some time.
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13. The book smart neighbours
Our neighbour home-schooled his kids and would always brag about how his children were geniuses with perfect scores on all the standarized tests. Sure, they got a 1600/1600 on the SAT but he would never let them play with us unwashed masses.
Twenty years later, his kids are still living at home and all of them lack the social skills to make connections and get a job. Book smarts will only get you so far.
14. The strange lady and her sons
Back in high school, one of our neighbors moved away and their house sold to this older woman and her mostly grown sons. She was a strange one, she cut down every tree on her property because of the “bad spirits” in them. The sons seemed to be popular, having people drop by at all hours.
All was relatively quiet until one day, while I was home alone, there was a knock on the door. Two gentlemen in very nice black suits and dark ties then identified themselves as FBI and asked me if we were ever approached by neighbor lady or her sons to buy anything. I basically replied with We don’t talk to them, they don’t talk to us. They handed me their business card then proceeded on to the next house.
I looked out the window and I saw 5 blue Ford Tauruses, 3 red GM Astro Vans, and one VIACOM truck that was being loaded with box after box from the neighbor’s garage. Turns out the sons were making those special cable boxes that got you all of the channels for free. After this it was only the strange lady left in that house.
15. Discipline your kids or jokes on you!
This happened a couple of days ago, so I am still rather annoyed. We live in a small block of flats, 6 floors (+parking garage), 39 flats. We had just returned from a big shopping trip and were waiting in the garage for the lift. Waited a few minutes, hear it move, hear lots of giggling and banging. 5 minutes more, still no lift. My partner went to see what was going on. The awful kids had jammed the lift open, using a screwdriver and were running around like crazy. No parents in sight. Now the lift isn’t working, I said on the buildings Facebook page that we caught the kids messing with it, but do the parents take any responsibility? No… They just keep saying that there must’ve been an automatic problem with the lift. Even though we caught them! The joke is on them, I’m on the ground floor, the annoying families now have to drag prams, etc, up 6 floors.
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16. Karma at its finest
A neighbor messed up when building a home and put his entire home well within my property (large piece of land with two huge clearings connected to two roads but separated by a large isthmus of trees). I didn’t notice because I had taken an 8th month vacation right after he started building (huge property, I didn’t go around and inspect it often).
So I got a real estate lawyer and surveyors to confirm it was in my property. I was going to sell him that clearing for a good price until I went to talk to him and he was the biggest jerk I had ever met. He essentially told me that he is going to sue me for “leading him on” despite the fact that I did not know him nor have did I meet him before that day. His wife flipped my girlfriend and I as we were pulling out of their driveway.
4 months later, I file a lawsuit saying he must destroy the property or turn it over to me immediately. It would’ve cost him more to demolish it and return the site to original condition so he signed the house over to me. He was still out for construction costs. I was living in a single wide with my girlfriend, then I had brand new, 2600 square ft house with all the hookups for water, electric, and cable for free.
Got the land for next to nothing, sold it for almost 50 times the value.
17. Its time for new neighbours
When I was a kid we had this guy living next door who seemed like a nice guy. This is the mid 90s and he had a neon business, so he was doing pretty well for himself. Then he got together with a crack head and his house slowly started turning bad.
At one point his septic system went up and since they were smoking every dime he made he decided that he was just going to make a cesspit. We live on the East Coast in the mid-Atlantic, it gets hot and humid come July. Thanks to this guy, our entire neighborhood smelled like a spot-a-pot at mid-summer festival for about 3 months.
Fast forward to January, nice and snowy, we come home to our house being broken into. Computer is gone, tv is gone, bunch of movies and meds are gone.
Cops show up and they start dusting and looking around. They go outside and low and behold there are tracks going from our side door back to the neighbors house. Of course, they deny everything and are at least smart enough not to keep the stuff around after we got home. They were not smart enough to use different names they pawned everything though. Needless to say, we had new neighbors within a few months of this incident.
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