We’ve all heard stories about Tinder successes and failures. But this story is unlike any other Tinder story we’ve heard. When this girl matched with the same guy on two separate occasions, she knew she had to give him a chance. This is her beautiful tribute to their relationship.
Well, we met on Tinder. We actually matched twice. The first time we matched, we chatted for a while, but I ended up deleting my account later on that day. A couple days later, I was bored and Tinder was my guilty pleasure so I downloaded it again. He was like my second or third match again. This time we talked almost all night, joking around with each other. He finally asked for my number and when he first started texting me he only sent me pictures of birds . And when I’m talking about pictures of birds, I mean pictures of tiny birds in tiny kitchens or sitting in front of tiny pianos or doing other tiny human activities. He probably sent me 10 of those before saying, “Oh hey, what’s up.” We’d sometimes still send those pictures to each other every now and then.
We texted back and forth for a long time before we actually met. We would text all day and into the night and tell each other everything and joke around with each other. He worked at the same company as my dad, it’s a huge company and they didn’t even work in the same building, but he’d send me screenshots of e-mails and IM’s he was going to send to my dad, just to mess with me. He thought it was hilarious.
Our first date did not go as planned. The plan was that I was going to park near his apartment and we were going to meet up and walk to a bar a couple blocks away and have a few drinks. Well, he worked as a software developer so he’d be “on call” sometimes and that weekend he was on call and his phone rang saying some server was down right when we started to leave for the bar. So, we went into his apartment and he was doing his work stuff while I awkwardly sat at his desk and watched him. He had a playlist playing in the background and a candle lit and it was nice. He ended up having to do work shit for a little bit and by the time he was done, we were just talking. He poured me some wine and we ended up staying in, talking and watching The Office. He was impressed that I basically knew every word to every episode we watched. We awkwardly made out on his couch haha and before I knew it, it was like 3:00 am. He told me I could stay if I was too tired to drive. We just hung out and talked even later so I did end up staying. We didn’t have sex and he didn’t pressure me to. It was so nice. I remember leaving and thinking to myself, “if I never hear from him again, I’ll be really bummed.” But he sent me a text before I could even make it home.
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Ever since we first met it was like we both “knew” that we found our perfect person in each other. We’d hang out whenever we could and when we couldn’t we were texting each other. And that never died down. Even up to the day he passed, we’d be texting and talking during the day while we were both at work. I told someone this and they said it was like we were the definition of soulmates.
My friends in my hometown found a kitten a couple months after he and I started dating. I had essentially been living there since I stayed there every night and they asked if we waned the cat. He was actually out of town that weekend at a music festival with his friends, so I said we’d take the cat and I knew he’d be okay with it. He was a bit weary of the kitten at first, but ended up falling in love with him too. He named the kitten “Gary” and Gary always loved him more than me.
He took me to my first music festival about six months after we started dating. It was small and close to our hometown, but it was amazing. He made it so amazing for me. Up until then we hadn’t made it “official”, even though it already sort of was. That was the night he first told me he loved me. We were standing next to each other and his group of friends were behind us. One of his favorite bands was playing and we were close to the stage. He always called me his “kitty” and he got close to my ear so I could hear him and said, “I’ve never told anyone this before. I’ve never been this serious with anyone before, but I love you, Kitty. I love you so much, Kitty. Thank you for coming here with me. I’ve never been happier.”
I was so happy I could have cried. I was smiling so big, I said, “Of course, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else but with you here. I love you too.” I knew we both felt that way for a while, but I also knew he was waiting for this “moment” to say it, because that’s just sort of how he was. He knew how to perfectly time moments to make them so special. We were camping at the festival and our air mattress had a hole in it (which we didn’t know about. I had wanted to blow it up before we left, but he insisted it was fine. Turned out it had a decent sized hole in it.) so we made a makeshift bed with blankets and pillows on the floor of the tent. I remember lying there with him late into the night with the music from the stages playing in the background and we were just talking about everything and about dumb shit. I was saying how I was so glad he took me there and I was so happy to be with him. Later that night, I was drifting off to sleep and I heard him say, “I’m gonna marry you someday.” I think he thought I was asleep so I don’t think he knew I heard him.
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Anyway, long story short, we were perfect for each other. He always knew how to make me laugh and he helped me become a better person every day. I learned so much from him. I ended up getting a pretty decent job, a “big city kitty job” as he put it and we moved into a really nice apartment downtown in our city. We were “big city kitties” together haha (his wording as well). We ended up getting another cat and when he’d come home and I was on the couch he’d say, “All my kitties are here! Hi Kitty!”
I pushed to go to one of the biggest music festivals in the world this summer and I’m really glad we went, all things considered. We saw his favorite DJs 4 times this year and each time was amazing. I’m glad we did what we did while we were together (even though both of our moms got on us about spending so much money). I feel so lucky to have shared those experiences with him.
I miss him so much. He died so unexpectedly. One minute he’s texting me telling me how he finished a project at work and he’s heading home and then 5 minutes later I get a call from his coworker saying he collapsed on the sidewalk and he’s gone forever. They don’t even know what happened, just said his heart stopped and they couldn’t bring him back. Sometimes I miss him so much it hurts. It’s like I have a huge empty hole inside me now that can only be filled by him coming back to me. I’m back at work now and I’m trying to keep myself busy, going to the gym, unpacking at the new place I had to move to, and doing whatever else. He’d want me to still be moving forward, so that’s what I’m trying to do now. Talking about him helps subdue the ache inside me for a little bit.
I’ll close this with the wise words of Above & Beyond, (his favorite DJs):
“If you love someone, let them know. You never know what tomorrow brings.”