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Women Share The Worst Ways Men Tried To Pick Them Up

By Veracia Ankrah
November 2, 2017
Shutterstock / Tom Harper Photography

Ladies, if you’ve stepped outside of your house well…ever, you’ve probably experienced an inappropriate comment or two made by a complete stranger, attempting to “flirt.” 

I’m just here to share women’s experiences with you. And fellas, please learn to respect the curve.

For more stories, you can find the original thread source at the end of the article.



My boyfriend was killed in a car wreck by a drunk driver one year ago. He had to be cremated. I am in college, and at the time I was walking across campus when his mother texted me that the cremation had been done. I fell to the ground in tears.

A guy came up to me, picked me up off the ground and hugged me. I just cried into his shoulder and told him what had just happened, saying something like “my boyfriend died…”He said “well, do you want a new one?”

cactusflowercorpse

My wife got this one prior to meeting me.

“Can I buy you a drink?”

“No thanks, I am good.”

“You telling me that pussy is free?”

jaybuck34

When I was on holiday a man was hitting on me and told me he could sense that my plane I was getting home the next day would crash, and that I should stay there with him.

I was 14 and he was in his his 30s or 40s.

Elcyis

He wrote a love letter/poem to me that included the phrase “Let thy juices secrete.” 

martianeagle

He told me that we were destined to be together because in several previous lifetimes we’d been teen lesbian lovers in an alternate universe where anime was real. 

He insisted on calling me by my “true name” (the name of some crappy anime character he liked) and he would even “correct” my school papers with the “true name.” He had a notebook full of stories and drawings about our future life together, and he’d picked out names for our children and designed my wedding dress. 

This was all after we’d talked to each other casually a few times in class…

It gets worse… he stalked me for several months after that. 

He ended up getting kicked out of university because 1) he skipped most of his classes so he could follow me around, 2) he had a huge collection of underage anime pornography and he would openly talk about wanting to screw 9-year-old girls, 3) he masturbated so much that his roommates complained and lastly, 4) after masturbating he liked to wipe his hands on things that girls might touch.

shinkouhyou

Upon finding out that I can’t drink because of a medical issue, a guy told me:

“It must be hard for a guy to flirt with you considering he can’t get you drunk and stupid?”

Thanks, I guess?

SalemScout 

“Honestly, for a Black chick you’re pretty hot. Are you sure you aren’t mixed?”

fwmyself

Maybe not the worst, but certainly the weirdest.

Some guy came up to me at work and started quizzing me. “What’s your name?”,”Do you have a boyfriend?”,”Do you think I’m cute?” The direct approach. I assume it has worked for him in the past.

But then he asked if I had any kids. I said no. This seemed to derail his train of thought completely. He said he couldn’t believe it; he’d never met “a girl my age” who didn’t have kids, and he kept following me around and repeating it. “Seriously? You don’t have any kids? You’re not messing with me?”

I escaped into the warehouse and didn’t come out until I was sure he’d gone.

aciewoo

I had a guy tell me, “you were a lot more interesting before you started talking” and then continue to flirt with me. 

I don’t know if that was an attempt at negging or what.

FigHewton

A guy told me he was done going out with attractive women and now just wanted to date someone nice instead.

Thanks buddy.

thegirlwholikescats

“You know, I can’t decide who you look more like: a blow up Japanese sex doll or a sexy version of Sid from ice age.”

devhamrick

“You don’t wear as much make-up as a woman should but I like natural beauty.” 

Ugh, okay…

edudyn

I had a guy at a bar notice I was Italian, and then proceed to tell me how great Mussolini was before asking me how I would feel about a “naked 30-year-man lying on top of me for 30 seconds.”

I think it was supposed to be a pick up line.

natroberts14

“You know, I’m going to another bar later. You are not my only option”

…I was never an option.

Anokest

“You look like a less attractive version of X celebrity.”

It was online, and when I told him I didn’t think that was a great compliment he messaged back with a giant essay about how I was a slut and deserved to get raped. A literal paragraphed essay.

It was amazingly insane.

flipflopsandwich

He said he doesn’t mind providing for me in exchange for companionship. I told him I was dating someone and he still tried to convince me that he’d be a better option.

Dude, I’m just waiting for my bus, I don’t need your money.

lilbeanies

“I would suck your dad’s penis just to get a taste of the recipe.”

What do you say to that???

frixum-pullum 

He stole the crutches I needed due to a dislocated kneecap and told me “well you can’t run away from me now.”

firestick_and_d**k

I had a guy approach me and ask me if 

I wanted to see a magic trick. I said sure and he then proceeded to grab my wrist and put my hand on his crotch. 

I then punched him in said crotch.

sweepingpines

I’m Japanese and this white guy was hitting on me and was trying to speak Japanese to me (I guess he thinks it would give him brownie points). 

He then tried to CORRECT my Japanese. I was speechless. 

I pretty much just got up and left without another word.

monk3p0d

A bartender I worked with told me this story a few years back. She had a kid and was single, and a guy asked her if he could give her oral sex while rubbing Shea butter over her stretch marks.

elephant_on_parade

I had a guy tell me he wished he would have met me when I was younger, so he could get me pregnant and have multiple children with me because I was so hot. 

I was 17 at the time and he was 55.

EspeonLeafeon77

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