I wonder if the age old phrase, “cheaters will be cheaters” still holds true. If it doesn’t – these next stories make an argument for that tragic case, as these excuses are terrible.
To read more excuses (created with minimal effort from the cheaters) click the original article thread source below.
“I was a freshman, he was a senior. After 8 months he cheated on me with a girl who had just moved to town. His reason: ‘A higher power told me so.’ Mhm, okay.
10 years later we are both in the Marine Corps and stationed on the same base. (Note, I haven’t seen him since we broke up in high school.) I was new to the unit and he felt the need to tell literally everyone I worked with that, ‘we are meant to be together, it was fate that put us together. I’ll divorce my wife for her.’ Needless to say, I told my superiors and they kept his absurdity away from me.”
“She said, ‘It was a guy I used to have a crush on.’
Cool. Thanks. That totally fixes my broken heart.“
“‘You gave me the self confidence to ask him out!’…on Valentine’s day no less.”
“I had a long distance girlfriend that cheated on me.
‘He made feel special and went out of his way for me.’ Where there were times I would drive all through the night for 5 hours just to see her and make sure she was okay when she had a rough night, only to leave the next day because I had to. On top of mailing her flowers whenever she had a rough week. Sure he went out of his way…right…”
“My girlfriend was semi-long distance (close enough to drive to on weekends, but not during the week). When we got together, her best friend was a female friend with benefits. She was very upfront about it before we got together, and I said, ‘alright, that’s cool.’
She decided, without asking me, to start hooking up with her FWB’s boyfriend to ‘practice for me since we only saw each other on the weekends’.”
“I never got a reason. She ghosted me after 2 years. I guess it was easier for her than saying, ‘I’m pregnant and it’s not yours’.”
“She said, ‘His junk was huge and I wanted to see what it felt like.’
1. We were in an open relationship and becoming more invested in other people. After a long time together as one another’s sole intimate partners, I think we both needed to see what else was out there.
2. His junk size came up one night and we were both fairly confident that we each had the larger area, so we sent one another pictures. This is how we knew his size.
3. To me it was amusing. We are still very good friends, but for all intents and purposes, that’s about what we were at the time, too. Staying together allowed us a sense of security while we played the field.”
“My birth control pills messed up my head and it made me act out of character!”
“He said, ‘everyone in my family cheated and their significant other forgave them because they loved him or her’, implying that the real issue was that I didn’t love him enough to forgive him for cheating on me.
When I found out he gave me an STD he told me he had it worse because he had it longer then me…
He got it from screwing an exotic dancer and knocking her up. He thought it was a good idea to sleep with her without protection. She got pregnant, decided to keep it, and promised him she wouldn’t sue him for child support.
Surprise, surprise she did sue him for child support. His entire family knew and decided not to tell me to go to the doctors.”
“She claimed that the, ‘I can’t wait to screw you’ and the response ‘Me too, baby’ in her texts were lines from a movie they were quoting to each other.”
“She was torn between the two of us. Him, a successful lawyer who owned his own practice and wanted to take her, immediately, on a spur of the moment trip to Hawaii. Or me, the first year game developer who lives in an apartment so small you couldn’t open the oven all the way or it would hit the other wall.
They had a baby 10 months later.”
“She thought we were in an open relationship. I guess I should have made it clear I do not find it okay to sleep with three dudes at the same time.”
“He didnt give a reason. He tried to still say ‘its not what it looks like, I would never do that to you.’ And afterwards I saw a video of him clearly cheating on me with his ‘cousin’.”
“One of the first (of many) excuses given to me by my ex-wife was that, ‘you didn’t come home on my birthday.’
Trick, I was in the field on a training exercise in the Army! I’m not going AWOL.”
“My dad had just died. Two months later, I found out he had been seeing another girl. He said to me, when confronted, that I couldn’t move on from my dad and I needed to get over it. ‘The other girl was much happier, like you used to be.’
I lost a lot of weight that year.”
“There was no excuse, she just simply ignored me for a whole weekend and then later told me she spent it with another guy and that it was ‘time for us to move on.’
I asked if she slept with him and she said it was none of my business.”
“He said, ‘It didn’t count. We didn’t do the deed. I wasn’t doing it to have a relationship with her, I was doing it to fool her and make her feel like not smart.”
Yeah, buddy that just makes you a sociopath in addition to being a cheater.”
“Is this cheating? He’d never sleep with me, but he’d jack it every day to random women online and pay them, leaving me with all the bills.
His reason: ‘You should’ve worn lingerie more.’
Which is funny, because when he wasn’t sleeping with me, I’d buy new lingerie just about every week to get his attention, only to be ignored again. And I’d ASK him if he’d like to see me in anything particular. Adult film addicts are hilarious.”
“She worked with him. When I found out (by looking into why we exceeded our text messaging limits on our bill by $80, seeing it was all him, which prompted me to investigate further and start putting 2 & 2 together of other things that seemed ‘off’.) I confronted her and her excuse was, ‘you told me to ask him for workout advice, and one thing led to another. ‘
So it was my bad, I guess.”
“Once when I was in high school I was dating this guy and he cheated on me with this awful girl (who happened to have a child). My boyfriend of course denied the cheating as much as he possibly could and started ignoring the girl I guess as a way to prove his point.
She got upset and gave me a note that my boyfriend had written to her. One of the reasons he gave for liking her so much was the fact that she had a kid, and that I didn’t want any and how awful that was. It always irritated me because I was only sixteen, of course I didn’t want kids. He was ridiculous.”
“‘I love you too much.’
I’ve heard this one from someone who cheated on me. And I heard it from someone who cheated on a friend. Seriously I’ve seen that as an excuse more than anything else and I still don’t get it.”
Points are edited for clarity.