Remember that one earth-shattering thing growing up that got the whole school talking? These people certainly remember it. In fact, they were able to recount all the outrageous details on Reddit.
These stories, either put into consideration how crazy school was, or, hopefully, confirm how boring it really was. Content has been edited for clarity.
It Would Suck To Be The Janitor That Day
“In middle school, some kids put laxative chocolates in donuts and handed them out. The school went on lockdown. The police came. Kids were crying. Kids were pooping. Kids were looking for some donuts to get out of class.
Fortunately, I did not fall victim. Although, while the school was on lockdown, I was in my science class disecting owl poop for four hours.
I bet if we were in high school, the kids would have gotten stricter punishments, because, legally, it could be poison. It was an interesting day.”
“Most People Found The Whole Thing to Be Somewhat Suspicious”
“I went to Catholic school, so we had a school chaplain who was, essentially, some sort of ‘friend to the kids.’ It sounds really creepy when you say it like that, but the dude was freaking amazing. He talked multiple students out of suicide, helped tons of kids come to terms with and overcome bullying, harassment, and domestic abuse; as well as encouraging every single student to reach for their dreams. Anyway, he once went the extra mile for a VERY troubled family at my school.
The two kids in question were adopted brothers and both incredibly unstable. The brothers would be your best friends one second and then suddenly fly off the handle the next, making you fear for your life. Knowing their family problems, the school chaplain volunteered to become the two boys’ godfather in order to legally be able to help them and their family out financially. About a year after I finished school, the school chaplain appeared in the local newspapers. He had been arrested and imprisoned for violating the older of the two lads.
For most people, that was enough to condemn him, but most of the people I went to school with found the whole thing to be somewhat suspicious. Whenever someone encountered one of the two boys, they would instantly launch into a step-by-step recount of what exactly happened, as if desperate to convince everyone they knew that they were telling the truth. The only thing wrong was that these step-by-step recounts were usually vastly different each time they were told, as if poorly thought out.
Regardless, the chaplain was imprisoned and eventually died of cancer while still inside. It was only after his death that it finally came out that the assault never happened. The chaplain had run into financial trouble himself and was unable to keep giving the boys’ family money. As punishment, the whole family invented the story to ‘teach him a lesson.’
The guy was a hero. He even helped my girlfriend at the time get through her parent’s divorce in one piece, and yet his lot in life wound up with him sad, forgotten and alone.”
“A Game Of ‘Catch Me If You Can’ Until The Ambulance Arrived”
“When I was in high school we had an ‘outdoor discovery’ class that was basically just a giant ropes course. The teacher for that class was a nice middle-aged man. One day, he decided to take a shower in the locker room between periods and had a stroke. Now, I don’t know what about this stroke was different, but it made him decide he needed to go for a jog… around the high school… and middle school… with no clothing.
So, he was sprinting past classroom windows in just his socks and sneakers, which he somehow thought to put on, when a sub went outside to see what was going as the outdoor teacher ran over and basically started playing a game of ‘Catch Me If You Can’ until the ambulance arrived. It was a very odd day, but he was back to work a couple weeks later, making kids swing from ropes and climb over logs like normal.”
“I Thought He Was Just Going Duck Hunting”
“In elementary, we had three students who had to go out and empty the compost in the afternoon. One day, my two friends and I were disposing of the compost outside and we saw a guy carrying a 12-gauge (which happened to be loaded) literally down the road beside the school. My friends and I thought he was probably just going duck hunting, so we went over and talked to him. He was a pretty chill guy.
When we went inside the school, everybody was hiding underneath the desks and the school was in lockdown due to an armed man walking around the school with intent to kill. I was scared at the thought of such a man, not realizing I had just had a five minute conversation with him about hunting.
The next day, we all found out that the armed man broke into a house down the road and shot somebody.”
Foulest Prank Ever?
“Very late to this but just had to contribute. We had a tradition that the people in seniors about to leave high school had a ‘muck up day,’ where they would come in after their last exams to pull some pranks as a send off, if you like. They were pretty funny for a while, but each year group just had to ‘out do’ the one before. One year decided to put live fish in the swimming pool. Unfortunately, they all died and it stank for ages.
But the one I vividly remember was when I was maybe two or three years into high school. As the bus pulled in, we saw all the seniors in swimming gear, kitted out with water shooters, balloons, the lot. The rest of us filed into the school hangout areas before the bell. Then came the onslaught of these guys firing water at us all. Pretty funny.
Then, we realized some of these shooters were full of fish oil (stank out the dining hall for about a week). Some poor sod got splattered by a water balloon filled with rotten milk. Then, we were all in a stampede to get away from it all.
I soon found out that, not only were these shooters and balloons filled with water, oil, and milk, but some guys actually filled theirs with urine. Pupils got sent home to change. Cops were called. That was the end of all muck up days.”
“We Must Stop The Bathroom Bandits!”
“Someone stole a urinal from one of the boys’ bathrooms in high school. All year, the principal went on about how if we knew anything we should come forward because ‘we must stop the Bathroom Bandits!’
Of course, no one came forward because, once the Bathroom Bandits had a name, they became legend. I never did find out who they were, but someone found the urinal three years later hidden under some stairs behind the auditorium, a good distance from the bathroom it was taken from.”
“Many Kids Discovered ‘The Birds And The Bees’ That Day”
“Back in my middle school, to get the kids interested in alternate careers and such, you could take a TV Production class with high end equipment and everything. I’m talking, like, brand new Macs and high quality handheld cameras. Anyway, there was also an interesting rule that came with this class that if you were taking it in eight grade, you were required to help do the morning ‘newscast’ at least once and you were graded on it.
So, one of the things that could be broadcasted on the morning news was a video of a field trip or sporting event that had to be provided for the ‘director’ who sat in the booth and made sure everything ran smoothly. Now, on one particular morning everyone was running late due to a bus that fell behind because of heavy construction. I was in eight grade and was pretty bored with the morning news cast and just trying to fall asleep at this point during homeroom. But, something was different.
It started late and the two kids chosen to be anchors seemed rushed, which usually meant everyone is. And then they cut to, ‘and here’s some footage taken by Sarah of the big game!’ and I kid you not, god as my witness, instead of some mediocre middle school football game playing, it was a scene from some hentai where a girl was getting plowed in her pooper complete with loud moans and chest slapping. Many kids discovered ‘The Birds and the Bees’ that day.
Let me tell you, no coffee has been able to wake me up as fast as hearing hentai being blasted in every room of the building to a bunch of 11-13-year-olds and some very confused teachers. Needless, to say since then, if the news was running late, they just didn’t do it and all the footage had to be submitted the day before news to be carefully combed over by the teacher.”
“He’s On America’s Top Ten Most Wanted List Now”
“The high school cop was fired for taking advantage of a 10-year-old girl. He then murdered his wife, and fled. He’s on America’s top ten most wanted list now. His mom thinks he’s dead. His name was Dan Hiers.
I spoke to him on several occasions and he was there when another student stole some of my photography equipment. I had a good friend who had a massive crush on him and she would always go out of her way to talk to him. Ugh, cringe.
I live in Thailand now, but I doubt he’s here. The checkpoints and boarders are very strictly monitored and a blond farang stands out like a sore thumb here. If he’s alive, I suspect he made his way into Canada and, if he was smart, to a boat to Russia.”
“When His Name Was Called, Students Erupted In Cheers”
“Park Center high school class of 1988 had a ‘phantom student.’ Some students working in the office managed to create a student (on paper), enroll him in classes every semester, and even got him to pass a few classes despite the fact that he didn’t even exist.
The highlight was when they managed to have his name called by the principal during the graduation ceremony. Most of the class was aware of this phantom student and, when his name was called, most of the students erupted in cheers.
God speed, R. Zimmer.”
“Jeremy Spoke In Class Today…”
“Jeremy Delle shot himself in class and Pearl Jam wrote a song about it.
I was a senior in 1991 and Jeremy was a sophomore, so I didn’t know him personally. I was in the counselor’s office in the hall beneath where it happened. The shot sounded like someone dropped a stack of books. It wasn’t until a girl ran screaming down the hall when people realized something horrible had happened. There was a kid who lived down the street from me who was also in the class when it happened.
It happened around third period and they kept us in our third period class for about an hour and a half extra before they dismissed school for the day. The local news that night was, well, strange, seeing these people who didn’t know Jeremy talk about what a tragedy it was. I think they just wanted to be on TV.
I did know the teacher whose class he killed himself in. Her name was Mrs. Barnett and she was your standard, old school English teacher – tough and fair. I have no idea how this affected her, but she did continue to teach. Tough, old broad.
Weirdly, I did end up making a friend in college whose father had been a therapist in Dallas and had treated Jeremy. My friend didn’t know much about it, except that his father wasn’t terribly surprised by the suicide. Apparently, Jeremy had been in counseling and had mental issues for most of his short life.
I like the song. It’s not accurate to the story, but it’s not supposed to be. It was just the inspiration. In real life, Jeremy’s parents, at least his dad, tried to get him help. The song captures the turmoil of adolescence and the frustration of a world that was starting to change. All of these recent progressive changes had their groundwork done in the 90s.
One thing about popular music that you discover as you get older is that the main source of joy that it brings is not the music itself, but its ability to transport you back to the time when you first heard it. ‘Jeremy’ takes me right back to being 18 and starting college. I could never view it objectively. It’s part of my past and part of who I am.”
“She Swore On Our Lives It Was True”
“I remember my senior year, near Halloween time, a teacher told a story to us. She swore on our lives it was true. Around 15 years earlier, a teacher by the name of Mr. Huntely was close friends with two girls in the school behind the other staff’s back. It was a normal relationship between them, like the kind of cool teacher-student relationship. There was nothing suspicious until one day some stuff went down.
Mr. Huntely offered the girls to come to his house. Some sick stuff happened. He apparently tortured them with fire and electricity and burned them with his fireplace, forcing their arms, legs, heads into his fireplace until the girls were dead.
I was a bit skeptic at first, thinking it was some scary Halloween story, until a few months later I suddenly remembered it and asked another teacher to confirm it. It was true.”
Be Careful Who You “Friend”
“Some kid created a fake Facebook for a chick named ‘Brittany.’ Brittany was apparently going to move to our school. Rumors went around that people had actually met this chick and some people had been bullying this girl by leaving bleach on her front door step. Things escalated and then Brittany decided to threaten to blow up the school.
We had about three days of school lockdown because of a fake Facebook that some kid decided to create and mess with people. I wasn’t directly involved and it’s a very blurry memory but, yeah, that happened.”
“They Banned Citrus Fruits After That”
“I went to the biggest high school in our state, so they broke our schools up into two grades each. Even still, the intermediate high schools were tiny and old, basically packing us in like sardines. In ninth grade, I was plowing my way through one of the halls, trying to make it to my locker without getting elbowed or unintentionally felt up when some girl started screaming.
A circle formed around her where she was lying on the ground, unconscious. It turned out that our mess of a quarterback had thrown an orange down the hallway for no apparent reason. It smacked this girl in the eye and she came back with a patch the next day, telling everyone she had PTSD. They banned citrus fruits (as if an apple or watermelon is incapable of messing up your eye) after that and it’s still in the school handbook.
This was the same kid who got us assigned seats at lunch in middle school because he and his friends stood up one day and started clapping for thirty minutes straight. The teachers literally just stood there screaming at them through megaphones.”
“Someone Who Is Not An Idiot Told On Them”
“In the eighth grade, two girls attempted to get wasted on lamp fuel. It was like lighter fluid for old lamps. It wasn’t kerosene, but some kind of ethanol based lamp fuel. They ended up in the ER for a few days. Luckily, they got sick quickly and a teacher found them puking in the bathroom because someone who is not an idiot told on them.
They actually were some of the wilder kids in our group. We had all had at least some experience with adult beverages. A few of us were drinking on a fairly regular basis, myself and both of these girls included… which, to me, makes it worse to do something so stupid. We may not have been able to get stuff every day but girl drinks (Smirnoff Ice, Zima) were almost always around, so there was no need to do this other than to be ‘cool’ and ‘edgy.'”
“School Became A Quiet Place After The Incident”
“There was this girl who was loved by almost everyone in my old high school. She was extremely pretty, very smart, and made beautiful art. I personally had her in one of my classes and, while I had a sneaking suspicion that she didn’t like me, she still remained pretty friendly.
I don’t recall the exact details, but one night she and her boyfriend were walking down a main road that connects many neighborhoods to a highway. It’s a rural area, so there were no sidewalks and street lights were scarce and far apart. A car came down the road and didn’t see them in the dark, hit the girl, and killed her.
The saddest part was that she and her boyfriend were holding hands. She was literally ripped from his hand, while he sustained very minor injuries to his arm. I remember him being inconsolable and I definitely felt the worst for him. I also felt bad for her best friend, who told me how upset it made her to see people who barely knew her trying to pretend like they were an important part of her life.
School became a quiet place for a couple of weeks after the incident. Also, my mom now lives in one of those neighborhoods. Passing the memorial makes my chest feel heavy. Add that to the fact that this is on the same road as a supposedly haunted hotel, and many hometown friends now refuse to drive down at night when I’m there during the holidays.”
“Everyone Liked Everyone, Except This Monster”
“There literally wasn’t any bullying or teasing in my school, at least, that I know of. I was a band/math nerd who could barely get through gym, so I probably would have known. We didn’t have sports teams and were a school for ‘gifted’ kids, so most of us had been teased when we were younger and knew what it felt like. This was 7-12th grade. However, our grade did have the derelict.
Everyone liked everyone, except this monster. He was just so freaking rude to everyone. Kept swearing he was going to get his older, ‘so cool’ friends from New York to come beat us up (we were in the deep south) and that he was way too smart and awesome for all of us. Well. Come sophomore year, and one day, he was just not there any more. It turned out that he had a hit list in his locker of about two dozen teachers and students, as well as a date for the next month.
I don’t know how they got permission to search his locker or the full story, but I do know that this wasn’t just a rumor, because the principal sent out multiple emails assuring parents they were handling the situation with the appropriate care and that they still needed to send their kids to school. Plus, on that date, we had a squad of police cars in the parking lot and police dogs roaming around. As upperclassmen who, naively, really, didn’t realize how common and possible school shootings actually were, none of us were actually scared and we actually had some fun scaring the seventh graders with stuff like,’OH GOD, HE’S COME TO KILL US!’ In retrospect, not very funny. I don’t know what happened to this kid, either. Rumor was he was in juvie. I hope he was getting help and not just in kid prison.
Not only was this ‘the incident’ at my school, it was the ONLY incident at my school, at least in my year. Literally. In my six years there, I think there was only one fist fight. We completely lacked drama of any kind and it was actually a pretty chill place. Now that I’m in college, I’m realizing how lucky I was, because me and my high school friends are finding out we’re the only ones that actually enjoyed high school. It seems like everyone else we meet in college hated it.”
“A Great Example Of The Gap Between The Students And The Administration”
“My best friend is still one of the only freshman to be expelled. He is an extreme conservative at a very liberal school, and this was during the Syrian Refugee Crisis. He was kind of an outcast, but also very intelligent.
One day, the topic of the crisis appears in class. He said the conservative opinion about the crisis and everyone looked at him and basically ganged up on him in the argument. He got so worked up that he said to my, friend: ‘After I kill all the Muslims, I’ll kill you.’
Now, my friend who got told this didn’t know my best friend well at all. He just knew him as the crazy nut. So, these words really meant something to him. He came and talked to me about if what my best friend said had any weight and if he would really do it. I said, ‘No, of course not.’ My best friend is really amiable and would never do such a thing. Just at that moment, my best friend came over to me and opens up an ammunition magazine, in front of the kid he said he would kill. This guy got spooked. This was on a Friday, so we all went home after school.
My friend, according to his parents, talked to one of the teachers and they brought it to the administration. My best friend then went to juvenile for two days until he was let go. He was expelled for threatening another student and isn’t ever aloud back on campus. The school, however, lied about what happened and it is now a great example of the gap between the students and the administration. We became better friends somehow after that incident, but it brought about a complete political change at my school.”
“He’s Lucky It Happened Back In 1999, Not Nowadays”
“A kid took a Polaroid picture of his junk and put it in the men’s room in sixth grade. God knows why. Anyway, they somehow figured out it was him and this followed him all the way through high school.
I believe he got caught by bragging about it to a friend. He was suspended for a few days, too. He’s lucky it happened back in 1999, not nowadays. It probably would have been A LOT worse.”
“Everyone Called It The ‘Axe-cident'”
“This one kid was constantly bullied by a group of rednecks. One day when he was at McDonald’s they showed up and started taunting him and berating him, and so he left and went to the tractor supply store next door. He walked around and they followed him and started taunting him again, just being losers. Next thing they knew, the bullied kid picked up an ax from the aisle and hit the leader of the bullies in the face. Everyone called it the ‘ax-cident.'”