From seeing into the future, to knowing where exactly in the world dinosaurs live today, adults share the strangest thing a child has ever told them.
[Source can be found at the end of the article]
Every customer should be more like this kid
“I work retail and was having a super terrible day. This little six-year-old kid walked up to me and asked very politely, ‘Excuse me sir, do you work here?’ I told him I did and asked what he needed help with. I noticed his parents weren’t around so I figured he might have been lost. He looked up to me and said, ‘Out of all of your smart TV’s, which one would you say is the best one?’ I treated him like I would any other customer and I asked him what features he was looking for. He listed off how he needed a certain amount of HDMI ports because he had an Xbox and a PS4, and he started telling me about how they all need an HDMI. I pointed him to one he might like and he gave me the biggest thank you and just walked away. He was like a tiny adult, super polite and very friendly. Easily made my day. So many grown adults had chewed me out that day for trivial stuff and then there’s this kid acting more mature than any of them. It was strange, but I can only dream of getting more customers like that kid.”
Feline reincarnation in this family
“One time my sisters and I were talking in front of our nephew, who was a toddler. I guess he wanted to be part of the conversation because he just casually said, to none of us in particular, ‘you know, my granddaughter was a kitty once.’
It took my sisters and me a second to realize the nonsensical sentence he said. I still sometimes tell my sisters that my granddaughter was a kitty once.”
Memories of pop tars
“One day I was talking to my then 4-year-old son. I said we were going to the store to get some things and would he like us to get him some pop tarts or something. He said:
‘Yeah I love pop tarts. When I was a girl I went to get pop tarts and then the car crashed and burned and I died.’
He then continued to talk about other things from when he was a girl.
Needless to say, we did not go get pop tarts that day.”
Little girl mastering dad jokes
“A little girl (5 or 7 probably) at Target asked me what I meant when I told her my service dog was working. I told her he lets me know when I’m sick.
‘Oh, so he’s your dog-tor!’
Also a very telling sentence for that girl’s future, to be honest.”
The kid that sees into the future
“I was crouching in front of this tiny little boy, 4 or under, trying to convince him to feed a nice animal without being afraid. He’s just staring at me with his eyes as wide as they can go, not responding to a single question I ask him or instruction I give him. I assume he’s stricken by shyness.
Then, in the middle of my sentence, he abruptly reaches out one teeny hand, and very lightly touches my cheek with his wee fingers.
‘What happened to your face?’ he asks me in a whisper.
My words die in my throat. I don’t know how to respond. His mom gets really embarrassed.
I spend the next week vaguely worried that this kid could see into my future, and someday I get into some kind of terrible accident that mutilates my face.
Or that I’m just really ugly. Not sure which is worse.”
That’s not beach fun!
“We decided to take a family vacation to Lake Michigan this summer. I was trying to get my 6-year-old daughter hyped about it, so I started naming things we could do at the beach like build a sandcastle or look for shells.
Without missing a beat, she said, ‘Yeah, and we could bury you in the sand and wait for the tide to come in.’ I slept with one eye open that night.”
Best not to get sick. Ever!
“Sitting outside my apartment on the little bench by the door just getting some air and this little girl walks up to me, no younger than 10 and just straight up says, ‘You’re going to get sick and die,’ and walked inside. I was pretty shaken, I won’t lie.”
Do math to choose a jersey number
“When my son was 9 he got to choose the number for his football jumper, and he chose the number 17. When I asked him how he came to pick that, he said, ‘It’s my age plus the number of my favourite Bulldogs player, and then divided by pi. I had to round it off though, they wouldn’t let me have a decimal.’ I always thought that was pretty strange – most junior football players aren’t doing math to choose a jersey number.”
The dog with no name
“I work in grooming, and I was waiting for a client to pick up their dog when a kid walked up and started talking to me. This happens often, as a lot of the time people come in just to let their kids watch the groomers, so I chat and stuff. Eventually I tell him the name of the dog I have. He responds, ‘My dog won’t have a name soon, on account of him not existing anymore.’ He was probably like 10ish years old? It was sad and just took me way off guard.”
Perks of working at a toy store
“I work at a toy store so I hear weird things from kids almost every day. One time I was on my lunch break and sitting in a small seating area and a boy, maybe 3 or so, comes up to me and motions me to come closer. I lean down and ask what’s up and he gets this super serious look on his face and says ‘Don’t fear the elephants. They don’t even live here!’ and then he ran off back to his table. I couldn’t argue with that logic, I mean, he’s not wrong.
Then there was another kid who was adamant that dinosaurs weren’t extinct. I was really curious as to his line of reasoning so I asked ‘if they’re still alive, where are they?’ and this kid gets the smuggest look on his face, like he was talking to the stupidest person on the planet, and says, with all the intensity a four year old can muster, ‘Oklahoma.‘”
The little girl that knows
“A little girl walked up to me at my job and said, with the sound of amazement in her voice, ‘You’re SO high.’
I said, ‘excuse me?’ So she repeated herself with the same enthusiasm. At which point, her mom steps in and says, embarrassed, ‘Tall, honey, you mean he’s very tall.’ The girl agreed with her mom’s assessment and they left me standing there, ripped out of my mind from my lunch break, wondering if that little girl was actually onto me.”
Home alone and hearing whispers …
“I was putting my child in the bath one night, and it was just us in the house. I think she was probably around 2 or 3. I suddenly felt really creeped out, like you do when you’re home alone and you feel like you’re being watched. I felt like someone was out in the hallway, when suddenly she looks at me very innocently and says ‘Who said that?’
The hair on the back of my neck stood up, and I put on my best poker face and asked her what she was talking about. She said: ‘Somebody’s whispering. Like this…’ and proceeds to make a kid version of an inaudible whisper. I was stone-faced as my blood ran cold and I couldn’t think of a single thing to say. After a few beats she just turned around and kept playing in the tub.
Still creeps me out to think about it to this day.
Kids are weird man.”
It was all a dream, kid!
“My friend teaches in a primary school (ages 7-8). One day this little boy comes in, is uncharacteristically quiet all morning, and just before break-time bursts into tears. Huge sobbing mess. There are some emotional kids in the class but this is not one of them – usually a bright happy little boy, lots of friends, no family trouble etc. My friend asks him what’s wrong and he says, ‘My dad died last night.’ He gives a detailed account, in tears, of how his dad didn’t come home and later his mum came in to talk to him and told him his dad had been killed.
My friend is horrified and sends a classroom assistant to reception to call the boy’s mother to ask if this is true and how they can help the child, while she herself stays to comfort her pupil, who is inconsolable. After getting over the shock she starts to think the story doesn’t make sense: kid’s family is stable and middle class and lives in a nice area, how would the dad have been killed, why would the kid be in school? She says to the boy, gently, ‘Um, [name], this wasn’t a dream by any chance, was it?’ Kid stops crying and thinks for a few seconds, then says, ‘Oh yeah, I think it was actually,’ and immediately starts eating his snack and chatting with his friends happily like nothing ever happened.”
The sleepwalker and talker
“My son, 12 years old, sometimes sleep walks/talks. It is SUPER creepy at times and others…so funny. Not to long ago after he had been asleep for four hours I had just finished the dishes and was debating sleep when walked up to me. His blue eyes were almost black from large pupils, and said, ‘I already explained it’s against the rules to use the jet to blow the tanks,’ I was confused but didn’t say anything and he said, ‘Nah, man I am not dreaming just don’t blow up my tanks or I’ll kick you out!’
The whole time he was looking my direction but not AT me.
I said, ‘Baby, you need to lay down. I can’t carry you,’ to which he turned and went toward the bedroom saying, ‘I miss that.'”
Visits from the other side
“My grandfather passed away when my little cousin was just about 1-year-old and when he was alive his favorite thing to do was lounge in the recliner either watching wrestling or curling small dumbbells. Fast forward 6 years or so, my grandmother, little cousin and I were strolling through Walmart and they had miniature recliners for children. My little cousin sits in one of them and says ‘I’m going to sit in this chair just like Grandpa!’ We were shocked. My little cousin could barely speak or walk when our Grandfather passed away, and we never really talked about Grandad around him. Made us think maybe he is being visited.”
An eight year old with no kids
“Once, while helping in my mother’s class room for a science experiment day, I was waiting in the classroom as the kids (third grade) started coming back in from recess, and one little boy looked at me and made a straight line over to me (I had never worked with these kids before.) He stuck out his hand, ‘Hi, my name is Tyrone,’ he said, ‘Hello Tyrone, I’m Mr. Phantom, I’ll be helping in class today,’ I said shaking his hand. He then let out a sigh and said ‘Yeah, I’m 8 years old, I don’t have any kids, I have a girlfriend, but she’s in a different class, so you know.’ I was dumbfounded and just said, ‘Oh, OK.’ He nodded and said, ‘Yeah… so I’m gonna go sit down now.’ I had to walk outside and laugh.”
Just being someone else
“I was a swim instructor/lifeguard for this community center that had a preschool attached. We were watching the preschoolers in the shallow area of the outdoor pool and I see one of the girls, Charlotte who was 4, playing over near a grandmother and grandkids. Charlotte is very friendly so she actually begins to talk to the grandmother. The grandmother asks Charlotte her name and she responds ‘Madeline’ with no hesitation. I do nothing at the time but later go and ask her why she told that lady her name was Madeline. She responded in the most cheery voice that she just felt like being someone else.”
Better keep an eye on her …
“My 6-year-old niece and I were hanging out one day when she suddenly looked up from her book and, in a completely deadpan voice, said that she wanted to take my skin and wear it so that she could be taller. Then she went back to quietly reading her book.
Another time I woke up from a nap with her standing over me, shaking a small container of something from her play kitchen. I asked her what she was doing and she replied ‘I’m seasoning you… but don’t worry, it’s chocolate!’ Oh, that’s ok then?
Her slightly older brother has been acting up a lot this year and has started deliberately acting out to provoke an adult response. He started doing this while we were out to lunch one day when my niece leans over to whisper, ‘If he’s going to be bad then I’ll help you put him in the oven when we get home.'”
Awkward and embarrassing moment in the mall food court
“I was watching my cousin’s 5-year-old in the mall food court while she went to the restroom and the little kid said, quite loudly, ‘don’t touch my peepee!’ Which caused everyone in about an 8 mile radius to look at me. I obviously had no intention of ever touching his ‘peepee,’ but I guess he got a lesson a few days back, that no one was allowed to touch it, and that whole talk, so he had just been telling people randomly not to do so for the past few days. I had not been informed of this. It was the most awkward and embarrassed I have felt in a long time. It didn’t help that a group of men sitting a few tables over said ‘Yeah, you tell him, little man.’ And most of the food court erupted in laughter.”
Best to avoid being alone with her
“My at the time 5-year-old cousin was trying to get me to stay in her room to play with her dolls or something while I needed to go downstairs. She told me to stay there ‘or else I eat your heart.’
Of course, I laughed because what else can you say when a 5-year-old says something like that? Then her gaze dropped and she told me, ‘Don’t laugh. I’ve done it before.’
I try to avoid being alone with that kid now.”
Kids are so much fun!
“My 2-year-old daughter walked into my bedroom as I was changing my shirt after I had gallbladder surgery a few months ago. She saw my incisions and said, ‘Mama boo-boos?’ as she pointed at them. I told her yes, and that mama is okay now. She looked at me for a second and said, ‘Oh. Nana boo-boos next.’ Sure enough, my mom had her gallbladder removed during an ER visit the next week. Probably just coincidence but it creeped me out.
My stepson once grabbed me by the face and stared innocently at me as he said, ‘Mama J, I love you. And the worms who will eat your guts when you’re buried will love you too. I’m hungry. Can I have a cinnamon roll?'”