1/30. I hope your foot hits the last step of a staircase slightly before or after you expected it to.
2/30. I hope you really have to sneeze, but you lose it and cant.
3/30. I hope your burrito has a glob of sour cream off to one end.
4/30. I hope someone drives slightly slower than youd like on a busy road.
5/30. I hope you enter a room and forget why you went in there.
6/30. I hope your shoe has something pointy stuck in the tongue.
7/30. I hope your pants get a little bit wet on the bottom and it transfers to your socks.
8/30. I hope you pour a bowl of cereal and remember there’s no milk in the fridge.
9/30. I hope your shift-key is a little sticky and your spacebar doesnt quite work every time.
10/30. I hope your laptop dies right before you plug it in.
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11/30. I hope you wash your hands and your cuffs get wet.
12/30. I hope your internet connection is intermittent enough to just barely allow slow functional browsing.
13/30. I hope you remember an insanely funny joke during a funeral.
14/30. I hope your windshield wipers squeak when they are on, but you can’t see when they are off.
15/30. I hope your TV volume is too loud, but you cant hear it when you turn it down one notch.
16/30. I hope you start pooping in a public bathroom and then realize too late there’s no TP.
17/30. I hope your Hot Pocket burns your mouth on the outsides, but the inside is still frozen.
18/30. I hope you eat a cheeseburger and the last bite is all bun.
19/30. I hope your shower starts running out of hot water as soon as you start shampooing.
20/30. I hope when you pick up a slice of pizza all the cheese slides off.
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21/30. May your marinara sauce never cling to your pasta!
22/30. I hope you lose one of the ear bud pieces on your in-ear headphones.
23/30. I hope you return from the grocery store and realize you forgot eggs.
24/30. I hope the the volume is too loud during the commercials, but you can’t hear during your show.
25/30. I hope you get soaked washing the dishes, because the stream of water hit a spoon at an awkward angle.
26/30. I hope you forget how long you were supposed to microwave your dinner after you threw away the box.
27/30. I hope your Mom walks in the only sex scene, in the otherwise innocent, movie you’re watching.
28/30. I hope you step on a Lego.
29/30. I hope your toilet paper tears vertically.
30. I hope you wake up four minutes before your alarm goes off.