Relationships are difficult, and they take hard work and dedication. There may come a time in a relationship when you’re faced with the question: “Do I stay? Or leave?” For these people, the answer was a resounding “LEAVE.”
Here are the moments that made them realize they needed to get out of the relationship ASAP.
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She was getting laid WAY more often than I was. Just didn’t seem fair.
I was trying to lose weight, and she’d tell me I’d never succeed. She brought home fast food all the time to eat in front of me.
I broke up with her and lost 100 pounds.
Well, she stabbed me. So, that was a clue to get out.
Got her a dozen roses for some occasion. She proceeds to call me about an hour later, asking what the meaning behind me buying her eleven roses. I explained it must have been a screw up at the florists, and she says “That’s ok, local town florist has single roses you can buy so just go get one of those and bring it by to make an even dozen.”
I asked her how she realized it had eleven. She told me that her and her mother counted to make sure I had got enough.
At that moment, her whole family came into perspective for me. Her dad was a lawyer who had a “trophy wife”, just a little past her trophy years. He frequently went on surprise, overnight business trips. Her 22 year old sister was getting picked up from the police station at least weekly which somehow never led to charges. Her mother (who was all but ignored by her father) would shower any guy brought home over the age of 15 with affection. The s/o in question had “jokingly” told me of her plan to go to college, find a rich guy, and marry him.
Thank god I got 11 roses once.
She said, “Either your cat goes, or I’m not moving in. Take your pick.”
(She wasn’t allergic to cats; she just didn’t like them.)
I chose my cat, and told her so instantly.
I realized she wasn’t “the one” when I realized that the whole “the one” concept is crap. I married her. I love her more than I can say. But she’s not “the one” because nobody is. People are complex and flawed and there is no perfect person that you will just click with and everything will always be rosy. Relationships take commitment and work. She’s not perfect, she’s not a goddess, she’s a just a woman and I’m just a man. She’s my wife and I love her with all my heart.
When my dad gave me the “I don’t think she’s good enough for you” talk for about the fifth time. After that I sat and thought about what he had said and tried to imagine her and I in the future, and just knew I wouldn’t be happy.
He deployed for a year. I was faithful throughout the entire deployment, and we stayed in constant contact through fb messenger.
Then he came home and ignored me to constantly go out with his friends or just do things that I wasn’t invited to. He would expect me to come over to his house so I could sit on the couch and watch tv while he mowed the lawn or while he visited his friends.
After about two months, when I realized how far apart we’d grown, I told him that I’d felt closer to him when he was in Kuwait. Now, he’d barely touch me, never talk to me, just wanted me “around” so he knew I wasn’t with anyone else.
His response was “Well, it was deployment. I didn’t have anything else to do BUT talk to you then.”
So I stopped talking to him.
When he started treating our toddler the same way he treated me. When he treated me badly, I rationalized it away as being all my fault, but nothing could convince me a baby deserved to be treated like that. And once I had that realization, I realized that I’d never deserved it either.
She had a threesome…whilst I was attending my uncle’s funeral.
Yes we were dating at the time.
I dated this girl for 10 months. We got into an argument one night while driving and I pulled into her driveway. Took the key out of the ignition and had it in my hand while we talked. I was scratching under my bottom lip with the key and she swung at my face. Ended up catching my hand with the key and putting my car key through my bottom lip. Kicked her out of my car and drove to the hospital.
I’d been dating a girl for a few months. One night, her cat got out and was bitten by a neighbor’s dog. He was terrified and in pain, and that might have been part of the reason he peed on the rug next to his litter box when we got him back inside. But the girl ran over and smacked him really hard in the head, yelling at him to stop. I immediately imagined what kind of mom she’d be if we ever had kids. I broke up with her a couple weeks later.
Not one thing, so many little pebbly things.
I won a discman in a work raffle and was thinking of selling it on craigslist. He was sulky that I didn’t give it to him. …he already had a discman.
I bought some cheap chocolate from a coworker for her grandkid’s school fundraiser. Came home, tossed it on a table and said “I brought home some chocolate if you want any.” He was sulky that I didn’t formally gift it to him.
He looked through my school things, found a schedule and decided the schedule I’d shared with him was a lie. I explained he’d found last semester’s schedule. He didn’t believe me.
So much sulking all the time. Sometimes I wouldn’t even realize he was mad until he wouldn’t respond to me when I thought we were having a good time. I learned not to drink if he was drinking because I needed all my brain power to notice what small thing was going to upset him and avoid it.
A friend asking me to go see a movie, I invited her to go with us. She said “No, have fun.” Went to the movie, came home, she was crying because I chose my friends over her.
She also poked holes in a different roommate’s condoms.
She wasn’t the one.
She told me about the time she got so mad she crushed her pet bird to death with her bare hands. You know, because we all get so mad you just need to feel the death struggle of a small, innocent creature.
She also admitted to doing this with animals other than her bird including bunnies, a fish, and a dog.
She went to Miami for a few days on a work trip, asked me if I could pick her up when she arrives Saturday night at Newark Airport (I live in Brooklyn, so this is far from convenient for me) and I agree. She lands at 11pm so I plan to arrive at 11:20, giving time for taxi’ing to the gate and getting her luggage. I account for tolls and traffic and nail my arrival. I see her waiting at the curbside pickup area and wave and pullover. She tosses her bags in the back gets in shotgun and slams the door, puts headphones in her ears, and throws up her hoodie. I’m like “…uh. Hi?”. She didn’t give me a hug or kiss, not an “I missed you” or a “Thanks again for the ride” or even a hello. She says she wants to listen to her podcast and I’m like “fine, whatever” and turn on my car radio only to be met by a loud “ugh” from my right. I turn to her and ask what her issue is and she tells me the radio is affecting her ability to hear her podcast. That’s when I knew. Dumped her right there and then. Once I dropped her off I met my roommate at our local bar and we celebrated.
She made me choose between being with her, and being there for my grandfather who was diagnosed with Stage 4 Parkinson’s.
It wasn’t a hard choice.
She wanted me to slap her because she hit me every now and then when she got upset. I left her. Not a word, just packed my stuff up and headed out.
There were so many red flags but I kept going (young and so very stupid). The moment I realized was one evening when we were out for drinks. It was actually a nice evening for us for a change when the conversation turned.
“So…how long until you propose then? Because I still can’t believe I haven’t got a ring on my finger.”
It occurred to me at that very moment: I was NEVER going to propose.
After 5 years, I realized that I was willing to drop everything in my life for him, and all he had to do was ask. I would give up my dreams and ambitions if it meant staying with him in the same town, with the same people, forever. In that same moment, I realized that he would never even consider doing the same thing for me.
I haven’t seen or spoken to him in 4 years, and I plan on keeping it that way because I worry that all those feelings would come back if I ever saw him again. Love is wild.
I realized the moment she laughed about my depression.
She used her car as a ladder to break into my second floor apartment through the window, look at all my emails and instant message history, break a bunch of stuff, and wait for me while crying to tell me she was pregnant (which turned out to be a lie which I found out after she also lied about getting an abortion).
She asked me to quit the sport I play to spend more time with her. I now play it professionally. Don’t ever ask your significant other to give up on their lifelong dream. That’s a one way ticket to ‘we’re over’.
We had to be apart for a few months, and I slowly realized I was much happier when she wasn’t around. I started to regain my confidence and feel like myself again.
She calls to ask when we were going to meet up after the months went by and I just said, I don’t think I’m coming back.
I had stage 3 cancer. One day my significant other says to me “I am a happy person. And right now, with all your health issues, I am not happy. I deserve to be happy”. We broke up that day. 3 years down the drain.
“Buy me that handbag” on our first date. I laughed when I saw the 1,000 price tag. She was serious.
Took him to Urgent Care one night about midnight. He had bronchitis. We didn’t get home till 2AM. I got up a few hours later and went to work. He was a baby for a week, but made a swift recovery.
Two weeks later, I was running a fever and miserable. He wouldn’t take me to urgent care. I could barely walk a straight line. When I finally get to the doctor, I have a double ear infection, strep throat, and walking pneumonia. It took me two months to fully recover.
When I became more in love with my memories of her than the person standing I front of me.
When I realized that when something fun happened, when I went somewhere and/or witnessed something cool, had new experiences, learned something and was enjoying life – he was never there. We had totally different interests. He was a nice guy and we had a peaceful life together but the things I wanted to do weren’t things he wanted to do. Now I have someone who loves the same kind of life I do.
In college, I used to get horrible, totally debilitating migraines. I’d puke for hours from the pain, and eventually pass out when I was completely exhausted. My girlfriend of two years would nope out as soon as one started. I accepted this without question, because I’m sure it was seriously unpleasant to be around.
Awhile after she broke up with me, but while I was still hung up on her and she was still stringing me along, I hooked up with another girl. It wasn’t anything serious for several excellent reasons, but this girl who wasn’t my girlfriend, would arrange everything to make me as comfortable as possible, run cold water on a washcloth to put on my forehead, make sure I had something to throw up into, make sure my bed was cleared off and that I was comfortable, and all the other little things I’d have to manage on my own or do without if someone wasn’t there to help me. She wasn’t particularly interested in sticking around through all the puking either, but she wanted to do what she could, just because she was nice, and while we weren’t going anywhere romantically she still just wanted to help somebody who was in pain.
Sex with somebody else didn’t get me over my ex. An act of kindness and realizing how much it had been lacking in her is what got me over my ex.
I usually don’t mind age gaps like 5 to 10 years. We had been dating for about 2 months, and I all of a sudden just realized how different we were. We did enjoy our company together, but every time we were out with her friends I felt like I was back in my early twenties and every time we went out with my friends she found it dull and boring. It just didn’t work out, and we both kind of agreed that this wouldn’t work in the long run so we left as “friends”.
My wife of 13 years and the mother of my two children, seemingly out of the blue, claimed she had a “spiritual awakening” and can now see the future, communicate telepathically with animals, and can talk to angels. The angels told her to have an affair with another married man.
We’re actually divorced now. We tried to work it out. Saw two different marriage counselors the year following the affair. She had another affair, divorced me, and used her new found physic powers to manipulate a judge to allow her to move over 3,000 miles away with my children.
I was doing everything I could to save the marriage, for my kids. I was desperate! I researched and considered the possibility of a tumor, mania, or schizophrenia, etc. but she would get offended when I would suggest a doctor and refuse to go. I reached out to her family, and her mom flew out concerned. But my ex put on a show. She told her family I was abusing her, so they excommunicated me. She had me served with divorce papers, but wouldn’t leave. We cohabited for another three months after that. The most painful three months in my life. My youngest at one point told me I’m “the saddest man in the world”. Broke my heart to think my son thought of his father that way.
The day we told the kids, they both started crying. I started crying and they both jump in my lap and we held each other bawling. I looked across at her, and nothing. Just staring off in space, aloof. That would be the best way to describe her, aloof. Just removed, gone.
That was four years ago. I’m doing fine now. The only truly upsetting aspect is the wacky custody situation. But I’m trying to work on that.
Everything I thought I knew about him was a lie. For example, he was fired from McDonald’s for peeing in the parking lot in front of customers. He told me he quit 🙁