Ever been in a situation where someone says something just too incredibly stupid? Some people just don't know when to keep their mouths shut. Whether it is close friends or complete strangers, it can be pretty stunning and usually pretty funny.
We took to Reddit to find some of the most ridiculous examples of people saying (and doing) some really dumb stuff. The examples are sad and hilarious and a little disturbing sometimes. Enjoy!
Geography Is Hard
“I was at the airport flying American Airlines from Colorado to Rhode Island with a layover in North Carolina.
My phone died on the plane from Colorado to North Carolina. It wasn’t a huge deal but my boarding pass is on my phone. So I go to the help desk to try and have them print it out and there are two people working there at the time. They ask me where I’m heading so they can look it up I tell them I’m going to Rhode Island since I wasn’t sure which airport it was.
They then asked Rhode Island, where? I gave them the town it was in. They proceed to insist for the next ten minutes that Rhode Island is not a state. In my exact words, I said, ‘Uh, Rhode Island is definitely a state, I’m going there now.’
I was told I was being rude and they were no longer going to help me. To the two dumbest people I’ve ever met: go eff yourselves.”
Offensive On A Few Levels
“I was waiting in line behind two girls at a coffee shop. This first girl looked at her friend and said ‘Oh my god! I’m so hungry I feel like Helen Keller!’
Her friend responded with ‘Who’s Helen Keller?’
I was pretty surprised until the first girl finished with ‘She’s some Jewish girl that got locked in an attic.’
I. Lost. My. Mind.
I could not stop laughing for about 10 minutes. I had to step out of line to wait, and the whole time, the girls were glaring at me because I kept repeating ‘Helen Keller locked in an attic…’ over and over again.”
“I knew an individual who claimed that foreign languages (other than English) simply did not exist.
This person would also change the channel whenever something they didn’t understand was being spoken on television, since they were apparently operating under the belief that anything incomprehensible (to them) was ‘demon speak.’
They even had a bizarre string of backward logic to support their claim:
Christianity is the only religion.
People in foreign countries aren’t necessarily Christian.
Those same people don’t speak English.
Ergo, since Christianity is the only religion, those foreign people don’t actually exist.
Since those foreign people don’t exist, neither do their languages.
Thus, any apparently foreign language is a tool of the devil, meant to pull people away from Christianity.
Perhaps worse than the idea itself was the confident, matter-of-fact tone used in offering it. In much the same way that you or I would declare something mundane, this person simply declared that foreign languages were the devil’s deception.”
A Different Way Of Looking At The World
“Had a terrible roommate who was very overweight. He tried to explain to me why my diet was bad. Apparently, I didn’t eat enough ‘fresh’ foods. You know, like Krispy Kreme doughnuts, or burritos. Because if you can see the food get made, then it is ‘Fresh’ and ‘Fresh food is healthy, because it’s not processed.’
This is the same guy who tried to fight a drinking and driving charge because he claimed the cops shouldn’t have tested him for his BAC. Why, do you ask? Because when they asked him if he had been drinking and he said ‘Yes’ and they asked him to blow into the breathalyzer it ‘shouldn’t count, because I was hammered and that is not admissible in court.’
His license got suspended for a year, so he bought a motorcycle, because he thought you only needed a license to operate a car, and somehow Motorcycles were exempt. Then he got another drinking and driving charge on the bike, which he thought shouldn’t count because when the cops came and got him he wasn’t on the bike, which is true, but only because he had crashed it into a parked car and went flying over said car.”
Mars Is Hot Right Now
“I was at a movie theater watching ‘The Martian’ with some friends. One of them turns to me and 100% honestly asks ‘Did they film this ON mars?!’
No Gia, they most definitely did not.”
Native America Is Like America, But Older
“I was waiting in a very long line last year and got stuck next to a mid 20’s male. I’m a mid 30’s male that is Native American/Mexican mix. I have very distinct features and whenever I meet new people, one of the first three questions they ask is: ‘What are you?’
This guy asked me that question and I responded with ‘Native American/Mexican mix.’ He looked at me and sincerely asked me, ‘What is Native America like? I always wanted to go there.’
I just decided to have some fun and told him it is beautiful and has lots of natural areas worth checking out.”
Her Logic Is Not Flawless
“I recently had a roommate who, before I moved in with her, would regularly complain about stomach pains, diarrhea, vomiting etc. due to dietary issues.
Fast forward to about 1 month into us living together. She made pulled pork in a slow cooker one night and proceeded to leave it out for over 2 weeks while continuing to eat from it. She just left it on low heat the entire time.
I was obviously concerned, and early on told her that she should store the cooked food in the fridge. Her response was that the heat would kill any bacteria. She refused to stop, even after multiple attempts to explain things to her.
Sure enough, she became violently sick about every other day… and blamed it on something she ate that must have had dairy in it.
I think she finally began to see reason after cooking and eating a package of bacon that had sat out on the counter for several days. She got so sick she could barely move. I would have stopped her, but I didn’t notice it sitting out in time.”
It’s The Same Moon Everywhere?
“When I was 18 and on vacation, walking home after the first night there, my friend was staring at the moon for a bit and then she stops walking and asks her friend, ‘Is this the same moon we see back at home?’
A part of me died that night.”
Punked By Her Father
“My friends and I were making drinks one night. I don’t remember what drinks they were but it involved fizzy soda and stirring.
I grab a spoon and start stirring and my friend looks at me, horrified. She says ‘stop!’ I look at her confused. She continues, ‘you can’t use a spoon!’ I laugh and ask why not. She says ‘the acid from the soda will eat away the spoon, you have to use a fork so it can pass through the slots.’
She was probably mid-twenties when this happened. Immediately after that comment when we started laughing, I heard her dad giggling in the other room. She turned, face red, and screamed ‘Dad! You told me that the acid eats away the spoon!’
So, I’m pretty sure dad punked her.”
So Much Dumb
“This kid I was in the Marine Corps with was something special.
It will be best if I simply list some of his gems:
-Michigan (his home state) is on the east coast.
-His friend has a truck with speakers so loud they break the sound barrier.
-‘I have a cold but I am not going to take medicine because it is hot and I am sweating and it only takes a little bit of sweat to get rid of a cold but it takes a lot of medicine.’
-‘There is a bird that flies at the speed of light, I saw it at the zoo.’
-‘Insane clown posse is a better rapper than Eminem.’
-Watching a video of a Korean beauty pageant: ‘Wow, South America has some beautiful women.'”
“A devout Christian I worked with, legitimately, 100%, without irony thought that all Jews (‘real Jews,’ her words) were born with tails. Some had them removed to ‘blend in,’ others kept them hidden as a status symbol…
But all Jews were born with tails.
I tried to explain to her that they weren’t a different species and she got very defensive explaining that she wasn’t a bigot because she didn’t have anything AGAINST THEM, but yeah, if they were a ‘REAL JEW,’ they were born with a tail.
Talked with a Jewish buddy and he confirmed that it’s not that uncommon a belief.”
Less States = More Crowded, Duh
“A woman recently returned from her Mexican vacation. She was telling me about all the things she did.
She then told me it was very crowded there because they only have 31 states unlike the USA which has 50 states. Mexico has to squeeze all those people into 31 states so that is why it’s crowded. I just nodded.”
Concerts Of The Future, Today!
“A guy I know was buying tickets for a concert at a large venue, on one of those sites that lets you view pictures from the vantage point of your seat from a previous concert.
The guy refused to move forward on the purchase because, ‘no, I want to see pictures from OUR concert to see if the seats are good.’
Yes, he wanted to see pictures from the FUTURE before he bought his ticket.”
Just Off By About 5 Decades
“‘World War 2? That was like, 1992 right?’
This person was a straight-A student who went to UCLA, by the way.”
Super Concentrated For Super Power!
“When I was in college, a roommate called me into his room one day and told me he found a drink in the supermarket that makes you want to poop. And he’s super excited to have me try it.
So I walk into his room thinking he’s going to show me some kind of laxative detox drink or something. Then he pulls out a bottle of Ribena from the fridge which is like a blackcurrant juice thing. So I think to myself, Ribena is a normal drink, why is he so excited about it.
He proceeds to pour himself a tall glass of dark purple Ribena for himself and gives me the bottle to pour myself a glass.
Slightly cautious, I pour myself just a few sips to taste because I obviously don’t want to poop myself by mistake if what he says is true.
I finally take a sip and it’s incredibly sweet, and I feel like somethings not right. When I look closer at the bottle, IT WAS RIBENA CONCENTRATE!! Like you’re supposed to add 200ml of water to 20ml of the concentrate. AND HE WAS ABOUT TO DRINK A FULL GLASS OF IT.
A full glass of concentrate is about 10 glasses of diluted Ribena juice if not more.
No wonder he had to go to the toilet after, his body probably thought it was poisoned with all that sugar.”
How ARE The Trucks Going To Get There??
“In high school, a friend’s parents got transferred to Hawaii (military), so they were moving. We lived in California. The prettiest, but dumbest, girl I knew asked, ‘So, are you driving?’ When we laughed and pointed out that there was not a bridge between LA and Honolulu, she asked ‘Well, how are the moving trucks going to get there?'”
Really, Really Stupid
“I ran a movie theater in the early 2000s.
Because we had a large Indian population in our area we started carrying some Bollywood films. The night before our first showing I can hear the projectionist throwing stuff around the booth. I go up, ask him why the temper tantrum, and he says ‘it ain’t right we’re showing ‘their’ movies when they’re over ‘there’ cutting our boys heads off!’
It took me a few minutes to realize he was confusing India with Afghanistan, jihadists, etc… No matter what I said or showed him, I could not convince him they were different countries and different people.
The same kid insisted Leonardo Da Vinci must know secrets about Jesus because they ‘grew up together.'”
Ignorant But Postive
“I was once in a 3 day unending argument with my friend’s boyfriend over the fact that he refused to understand that Brazilians do not speak Brazilian.
They largely speak Portuguese and then Spanish. And I understood how he may have gone to school and not learned that in the US, and why someone would automatically think it was named after the country like some other languages, but this guy argued the point over and over. He refused to stand down. If I showed him information from a respected and established source online, he would argue that everything online was made up.
That ticked me off so much that I only let it go because I thought it was going to kill me if I kept it up.”
Confidence Is Everything
“I knew a young woman who drove her car with the overdrive switch in the off position. Her car’s engine screamed in agony, begging to go to fourth gear, while driving on the highway ten miles under the speed limit. She hated that car because according to her it was too loud and too slow so I explained to her how to fix the problem by pushing a single button. She refused my help because it was her daddy’s car and her father had told her that the Overdrive Off lamp meant that the overdrive was on. There was no arguing with him because he was the kind of man who equated financial success with being an expert at everything and he was loaded.
‘Oh, if you know so much about X then why aren’t you as wealthy as me?’ To this day I haven’t met another man who was so wrong about so many things and yet so sure of himself.”
They Should All Just Use American Dollars
“I’m in the US and was planning a trip to Australia. I went to the head teller at the bank to ask if I could order Australian currency there and save fees in the airport.
‘Do you need new money in Australia? Isn’t it in the United States? I don’t know why they wouldn’t just take our money.’
The $5.95 at the airport was a good investment.”
Who Loves The Sun?
“I was at a trivia night, and the question was ‘What is the closest star to Earth?’
As I’m writing the answer down my coworker says ‘well it’s either Venus or Sirius.’ I was stunned.
‘Well one of those is a planet, and I’m pretty sure if there was a closer star than the Sun…. we’d know.'”
They’re Next To Each Other…On A Lot Of Maps…
“My first Uber ride ever I was going from the Seattle airport to a downtown hotel.
The driver told me it was impossible for me to drive from California to Alaska. ‘They aren’t connected,’ and ‘it’s by Hawaii’ we’re actual words the driver used. I showed pictures from my previous 4 drives. He still didn’t understand it. Finally, Google maps to the rescue.
It only resulted in a ‘huh, cool’ comment.”
He Wasn’t Sure Just How Old He Actually Was
“One time a friend and I (at the time in our early 20s) had about a 15-20 minute conversation with this man we knew trying to make him realize he was not 32, and was in fact 33. I don’t remember the entire conversation (this was about 11 years ago), but there were two men we knew and one of them had just had a birthday, and the other man was insisting he was the younger of the two of them. When we asked him his birthday, he was born an entire year before the first man, and we had to explain the dates to him so slowly and go over and over it before he finally got this stunned look on his face and goes, ‘Oh my god. I’m not 32. I’m 33. I’ve misplaced a whole year of my life.'”