It's always satisfying when someone gets exactly what they deserve, especially if that person is being punished by the universe for their misbehaviors. Whether they're inconsiderate drivers, rude travelers, or just run of the mill nasty people, these cretins absolutely got what was coming to them, and it was a joy to see. Content has been edited for clarity.
Ski Lift Novice
“I was skiing at Breckinridge, which has a T-bar tow lift. For those which don’t know what that is, it’s basically a big upside down 6 foot tall upper case ‘T’ which is pulled by a cable. You hold on and it slides you up the mountain. The T shape allows for two people to hold on to either side of the crock of the T. People fall off of this all the time when they are not used to it, which gives locals a sense of superiority. Well one brave young boy, maybe 12-14 on a snowboard, set out to handle the T-bar. He lost his footing about 30 seconds in but held on despite being dragged. This happens often but usually for only a few seconds as most have good enough sense to let go. Instead this boy was dragged up more than a thousand feet on his belly. I was behind him as was another couple. We could not believe he was holding on. Well the T-bar stopped further up for someone else (didn’t stop for him) and he is too exhausted to stand up and fix his situation, but the couple behind him have been laughing so hard that when the T-bar abruptly started up again, they fell off. Bottom line is he made it to the top and they did not.”
A Deer In The Headlights
“There was a massive snow storm in the area I moved and having lived in a desert state all my life previously, I was not used to driving in such conditions.
Thankfully my boyfriend and I had finished up work around the same time that night and he swung by my work place so that I could follow him home through the storm.
Cue butt face. My boyfriend and I were driving pretty slow down the roads with our 4 ways on because the storm was so bad and it was really dark out and he was TAILGATING ME FOR MILES. Revving his engine, flashing his brights, the whole 9 making me even more freaked out than I already was.
Then he decided he’d had enough, he whipped out from behind me and sped up in order to pass us, however he failed to notice the deer on the other side of the road and ended up smashing the deer head on going about 45mph. Immediately had to pull over and wait for a tow truck. Guess that’s what happens when you try to be a butt face in a winter storm.”
“My dad told me this story.
He was driving back from the shore when traffic got really bad. About a mile ahead, there was an accident that had brought traffic to a crawl. Stuff like this happens, my dad decides to be patient about it. Others weren’t so patient. People began driving on the shoulder in order to get ahead of the traffic. This ticks my dad off. We all know how this goes. We do the right thing and are punished for it, where as these people are skipping in front traffic and will probably get away with it. He thought about following this stream of cars onto the shoulder, but he decided he’d do the right thing and wait.
As he got closer he saw two cops in a parking lot. One cop was directing all of the shoulder drivers into the parking lot, while the other wrote all of those drivers tickets. He describes it as one of the most satisfying things he’s ever seen.”
Fast And Furious
“About a decade ago, I was driving my girlfriend (now my wife) back to work in some light rain on the highway and this high school looking kid kept pulling alongside me on my right revving at me and trying to get me to race. I just shook my head at the situation and kept driving.
I got to my exit and, once you get off the exit, it splits into three lanes; where the left lane turns left, the middle lane goes straight into a commercial complex (where my girlfriend worked), and the right lane turns right. At this light, a lot of folks tended to stay in the middle lane and then also turn right (despite it being illegal) because of the terribly long light.
I got into the middle lane and that same kid goes flying up on my right side revving again and just staring at me. Turns out, he should have been looking ahead because WHAM! He rear ends the traffic stopped at the light. I dropped my girlfriend off at work and then returned to give the cops testimony. Turns out the kid didn’t even have a license. Ten plus years later, he still might not!”
Respect The Boys In Blue
“Earlier in my career, I worked in a small town, about 2,700 people, and part of our job was to patrol a 6 mile stretch of highway, after that it became a different county.
I was sitting in my truck in a convenience store parking lot writing a report. A car pulls up next to me and rolls down their window. I rolled mine down and there was a man and woman in the car. The woman said, ‘Y’all are only good for killing folks and eating donuts.’
And the man said, ‘Yeah, eff the police.’ I told them to have a nice day, and they drove off. A few minutes later I get a call for a stranded motorist. I respond to the call and what do you know, it’s the cop haters, and they were stuck in some loose dirt on the side of the highway. The guy said, ‘Hurry up and use your winch and pull us out of here.’ I had a winch on my truck, but I chose the low road. I told them that I wasn’t ‘good for that’ and offered to call a tow truck.
They mumbled under their breath some choice words. The tow guy got there, and charged them $100 to pull them out. They were pretty upset and expressed their hatred for me. I told them to have a nice day and left.”
The Landlord Learned His Lesson
“My parents leased a building when I was a kid to put their business there. They got it for a song because the owner, who was a pretty terrible businessman, had had a string of failed businesses there, so the rent was cheap. As soon as my parents turned it into a successful business, the owner tried to jack up the rent. When they pointed out they had a contract and he couldn’t do that, he spent the next 4.5 years trying to kick out my parents. Took them to court on trumped-up stuff more times than I can remember, because he knew they lost money paying attorneys and closing the business early to be in court (they both had to be there because both were on the lease — and they couldn’t really afford a full-time manager so either they’d have to close early, or pay someone extra for the day).
The landlord was such an ogre — he was a rabidly athiest real estate magnate who hated kids, dogs, religious people and religious holidays. My parents, being Christian, having kids and the occasional dog at their place of business, and closing on Sundays, just drove him nutters. Eventually, my parents closed the business and went into other lines of work. He gloated to everyone that he had won, and opened a dive bar in its place.
Flash forward a few years to the collapse of the Soviet Union. Turns out the person had mortgaged every piece of property he owned, taken the cash and invested it into a fighter jet manufacturer. The jet company’s stock immediately went to junk status because the end of the Cold War meant there was suddenly a huge surplus of fighter jets. He lost every penny and every property, had to declare bankruptcy and watched as his many properties, including our former business, were auctioned off for pennies on the dollar on the very court steps that were so familiar to his tenants. A new couple bought the site of my parent’s business, at a fire-sale price. Ever since then, it’s been a Christmas store. I asked the owners once, ‘Why’d you decide to open a Christmas store?’ (they had no idea who I was, I was grown by then) and they said ‘the guy who used to own this place was the biggest butt-hole in town, and he hated Christmas and animals, so they opened a Christmas store and their dogs are here every day. Fudge sample?'”
The Dog Is Fine
“A close family friend, let’s call him Jim, has a truck with a large covered bed, big enough to move furniture or put the dog in for a drive. Jim had taken his (at the time) 6 year old son and his golden retriever, Sparks, with him to the hardware store to pick up some materials. He was paying when the cashier’s walkie talkie goes off, ‘There’s a woman yelling in the parking lot, claiming an animal in danger.’ Jim laughs. The walkie talkie speaks again, ‘She’s trying to free this dog from the back of a truck, wants help breaking a window.’ But that’s when the realization hits him, that’s his dog in his truck.
He runs out of the store to see this lady and some onlookers/store employees surrounding his truck, Sparks happily watching from inside the back. This woman is yelling when Jim goes up and asks her to leave. She gets all defensive, blaming him for being a terrible pet owner. When his son looks at this lady, he starts giggling. She bent down and said to the little kid, ‘Your father is a bad man.’
Now, Jim is a reasonable man. But once she brought the kid into this, that changed things. He was yelling, and the two were cussing each other out in the parking lot. She throws her hands up and storms back to her shiny, new, black Lexus and gets in. Jim puts the kid into the seat and gets behind the wheel, in time to see her reverse too fast and slam into this shiny and new pickup truck. She just put her head down on the steering wheel and stayed there while the other guy yelled. Jim waved and smiled as he drove by.”
Road Rage Instant Karma
“While on the interstate heading towards Knoxville TN, I witnessed a lady talking on the phone while driving. Despite the distracted driving, she merged safely into the lane beside her. I guess it was too close for the guy she merged in front of because he was livid. He swerved over into the lane she had just merged out of and sped up to match her pace. He was screaming out his window what I assume were some obscenities and was gesticulating wildly. Veins bulging from his face and neck and everything. During his tantrum, he began a pantomime of talking on a cell phone and then he suddenly jerked the wheel towards the woman’s car as if to say that this is what she had done to him. However, in doing so, his hoopty’s suspension couldn’t handle the sudden input from the steering wheel. He over-corrected… and then over-corrected his over-correction before he began spinning wildly out of control, coming to a dead stop in the middle of an 8-lane highway and facing the wrong direction.
I witnessed all of this in my rear view mirror during rush hour. Miraculously, no one was hurt.”
Maybe Be A Little More Humble Next Time
“A friend and I were at a trade show (manufacturers showing of new tools, services etc) and we were both given a ticket upon entry that would be drawn at the day for a range of prizes. At the end of the day, everyone gathered around the main stage for the prize draws. At that time, my friend and this woman were having a laugh at how they almost grabbed each other’s bags of goodies as they both placed their bags on the floor. A ticket was called and it was my friend’s ticket. He won a power drill set and we went nuts! That was…until the lady accused us of stealing her ticket.
She went from 0-100 and began to reach and pry the ticket from my friend’s hand and asking everyone around us to check for their personal belongings. It was his ticket. We both walked in together at the start of the day and our ticket numbers were consecutive. The lady was going nuts. Dropping racist comments about us and walked straight up to the announcer with arms out demanding the prize. Officials also asked us to come over and discuss what happened and we showed them our tickets and offered to have the prize redrawn. The lady accused us all (including the officials, manufacturer of the prize and announcer) of theft and in the end – as my friend and I hate confrontation – he just gave her the ticket to diffuse the situation. Her reaction was that of someone who legitimately won a prize. Well done, lady.
Anyway we sheepishly went back to the crowd and waited for the other prizes to be drawn. The last ticket was drawn and who would have thought.. instant karma. $5,000 cash and other work supplies. This time it was my ticket! We got up on stage to a round of applause from everyone with the lady furiously trying to argue with the officials with security in between. I gave my friend half of everything and the representative who gave away the power drill to the lady gave us another drill, but the next model up.”
Remember To Put It In Park
“Back in college, my roommates were gone for the weekend so I decided to pick up a pizza and a video game from Blockbuster (man does that make me sound old) and chill out for the weekend. It’s important to note that this particular Blockbuster was on a hill and therefore the parking lot was rather steep as well. So as I was driving through the parking lot, I spotted a vacant spot and put my blinker and made my approach, but suddenly some dude in a hoopty decided the speed across the parking lot and shoot into my spot, forcing me to slam my brakes. The guy even had the nerve to get out and laugh at me while flipping me two middle fingers, but fortunately for me, he forgot to put his car in park and I got to watch it roll down the parking lot and smash into the back of another parked car. Turned out to be the Blockbuster manager’s car. Most rewarding instant karma I’ve ever experienced. Ended up renting some like Conan game and it sucked, but this story made it totally worth the trip.”
“I worked in a law firm. A legal clerk had gone out on a work matter for a junior lawyer. Important to note that the legal clerk had at least 25 years experience and the junior lawyer only had around 5 years at the point. There were some issues and the junior lawyer could not be reached as he was in court. The legal clerk, having to act fast, did the best he could based on his previous experience and knowledge to resolve issue.
When the legal clerk returned to the office and reported his actions to the junior lawyer, he proceeds to shout and scream at him for acting without instructions and that the action taken was wrong. The junior lawyer could have just said it in an even tone or been grateful the issue was resolved, but no, he had his big boy pants on and was going to town on the clerk. He shouted at the poor guy for close to an hour or so (I could hear the whole exchange from my place).
Things finally settle down and we go back to work. The junior lawyer, in an attempt to make himself feel big and perhaps to get the legal clerk into further trouble, goes to the senior lawyer to tell the story. It did not work out as expected. The senior lawyer says that what the legal clerk did was correct and that the junior lawyer’s solution to the problem was idiotic and would never have worked and that the junior lawyer should have kept in better communication with the clerk. The senior lawyer proceeds to chew out the junior lawyer for a good 2 hours (also could hear it from my place). It was glorious.”
A High Speed Chase
“When I was in high school, my friends and I got tickets to see Duran Duran at the Forum in LA. My parents allowed me to go even though it was a school night. Their only conditions were that my older brother had to drive us and we had to be home by midnight. We lived about an hour away from the Forum so getting home on time was going to be tight.
We get to the venue, park the car under a light in the parking lot that has space for really only one car. We go inside, and have an awesome time.
We get back out and some person parked their little MG right on our bumper, blocking us in. So we wait for them to show up so we can go. And we wait. And the clock is ticking to get home on time. And we wait. After waiting for about 30 minutes we’re really stressing out over the time.
I see a group of four big guys hanging out by their car and I go over and ask them if they can help me and my friends maybe move this car because my parents are gonna kill me if we’re late. I was an adorable and charming 16 year old and they agree to help pick up the car and move it over a space so we can get out.
With their help, we do it! And just as we’re done, the owner comes up with his psycho girlfriend and starts freaking out. We’re yelling at him that he blocked us in and he starts screaming that he’s ‘gonna mess us up real bad.’
We jump in our car, back up, and peel out. They jump in their car and follow us. We get out of the parking lot and the guy is speeding up along side us. He and his girlfriend are screaming and flipping us off. We’re coming up on a yellow light and I tell my brother to punch it.
We’re all afraid if we stop at the red, this guy is gonna get us. The guy is almost caught up to us, still screaming at us and not looking at what’s ahead of him. At the last second, as the light is turning red, we blow through and see the guy slam into the back of a parked delivery truck. We didn’t stop.”
Don’t Mess With A Street Vendor
“A bit of context: I live in a very busy street, there is always something going on. During the day, it’s mostly tourists just walking and looking around. But at night the bars are full and there are a lot of street vendors with drinks. These street vendors can get a bit pushy when trying to sell their goods, it might look like they just sell drinks but you can get pretty much whatever you want from them.
So after a night out, I got home at about 6 am. Tired and half under the influence, I walk up the stairs to my apartment, go to my room and I go to bed. About ten minutes later, people start yelling in the street. Being used to that, I try to just fall asleep, but then I start to hear people hitting each other. So I get up and open the balcony and look to see what was going on.
A group of four dudes was beating up a young street vendor. Bad move. One of them had a knife and the other three were hitting him with their belts. The poor guy then starts to make a run for it, screaming for help. He turns a corner and the four idiots follow him. About 5 seconds later they come running back followed by maybe 10 street vendors. Then more street vendors start coming out of the stores and all the back streets. There was a bit of a standstill at that moment, no one was moving, but everyone knew what was about to happen.
Then the street vendors started to throw full cans at the four idiots. They started to run away only to be met by the police at the other end of the street.
And with a happy ending like that I was able to go to sleep.”
“I’m Not Moving!”
“I took a full flight home from Hawaii. I go to my assigned window seat and notice a grumpy woman is sitting in it. I politely tell her she is in my seat. She looks at her boarding pass and sure enough she is supposed to be sitting in the aisle seat across from me. She starts arguing that she MUST sit next to her husband and she’s not moving. I decide it’s not worth the hassle and take the seat she is supposed to be in. I don’t even get a thank you or anything from her. Once we are in the air, the onboard entertainment of free movies/shows is available. I look over and see her yelling at a flight attendant that her tv is broken and doesn’t work. The flight attendant apologizes and explains that the flight is full and there are no other seats to move her to. She had the pleasure of enjoying a 5 hour flight with zero entertainment.”
They Didn’t Catch The Drift
“Me and some buddies were hanging out behind this warehouse drifting our cars. This building is long, like a half mile long. So you can see people pulling in from far off. So you can haul out of there if it’s security. So car pulls in and we all get the heck out of there. We get to the other exit and there is the car right behind us, Black Toyota that is not security. We decide to go to the gas station for a drink and whilst going there the Toyota flies by us on the other side of the road with two high school kids flipping us off and calling us fairies. Flash forward about 30 minutes and one drink later we’re pulling back into the warehouse lot and there is that same black Toyota ~15 feet into the grass. They had tried to drift around the building and subsequently hit the curb sideways at 35mph. Both passenger side wheels were face down towards the ground (think how the Delorean looks when it flies in back to the future). They asked us to fix it which was pretty funny, also for a ride home which both we denied. It was their moms car too.”