Going to the bank can be a real pain, but it makes it a whole lot worse when there is something embarrassing written in the "for" line of the check you're going to try and cash.
Here are thirty of the funniest things people have written in that line...
All that work and creativity…for nothing.
In an apartment I used to share with four other guys, one month I ended up having to front the rent. Three of the checks I got back had “ransom” in the memo line, one had “kidnapping.”
I thought it was hilarious and brought them into the bank to deposit them- the teller didn’t even blink. So anticlimactic.
Barkingpanther
Lewd messages all daaaay.
I was a teller for about 3 years up until last year. I never saw anything really funny come through, but I did have one customer who had to get cashiers checks every month for one of his vendors. I would always ask him if he wanted to put something in the memo line that would print on the check. He asked if I could put, “Go screw yourself.”
And so I did.
Every month for about 6 months, he would wait for me so his beer vendor received a check that had different variations of “Go screw yourself” and “Here’s your stupid money.”
Later I found out the VP of the beer company contacted that specific vendor to find out why the checks he deposits all had these messages on them. Can’t believe I didn’t get fired at that job.
Treb27
Quirky, cute things!
When I write checks, I like to end the “for” line with one or more letters to make it into a word, and then draw whatever word I made in the memo line. So, for example, I wrote a check to my mom and made “for” say “fork” and drew a little fork.
lissylove
Grandmother’s truly provide the most heartwarming stories!
My grandmother has Alzheimer’s, and one of the symptoms is that as the disease progresses she digresses in maturity level. Well throughout my teens she basically became a teenager again. In the “for” section of the check she wrote me as a graduation present, she wrote “bubble gum, other candy, and condoms.”
I love that she knows how important it is that bubble gum needs to be separated from every type of candy in my world.
bigbuzz55
There is a time and place for these jokes…
I live in a house with 4 other students, and to make things easier one roommate pays the utility bill, and we pay them back. I always mess with them by writing ridiculous things on the cheque. I’ve put things like “this is a stick up” etc. Apparently, my friends get weird looks from the bank tellers now…I wonder why.
wonderbread9000
Memorable Lines for paying rent.
I used to do this to my roommate whenever I paid him for the bills…
My favorites are:
Home-made lubricant
Pole Dancing Lessons
Eternal Possession of his Soul
There were others as we lived together for 2 years, and so I got about 2 chances a month to attempt to embarrass him at the bank. Apparently, he had explained what was going on to the tellers and they began to look forward to him bringing in the goofy checks.
And after he moved out, he got asked by the teller what had happened to my checks…
Anonymous
I think those checks actually tend to bounce…
I used to live with 3 other guys where one would pay cable, one utilities, one water, etc and we’d pay back our share by writing them a check every month. Some of my best checks had really intricate drawings of penises in the FOR section. Not just the penis itself though, I’ve found if you add in the surrounding legs and torso it brings the dick drawing up to a whole new level of realism.
Anonymous
When Dad comes in for the win.
A few months back, I owed my girlfriend some money for a concert ticket. I wrote her a check and under the “for” space I wrote “The fantastic night”. She didn’t really care because she was going to deposit it at the ATM.
Well, we both forgot that her parents can see her bank account activity. Her dad called her a couple days later laughing and said, “I saw that check you deposited. I can’t believe you don’t do that for free. He is your boyfriend after all.”
She was mortified. I was in tears laughing.
OnTheEveOfWar
Sometimes the check is the statement.
Long ago, my mom got stuck in her dentist’s office because they had done some unnecessary cosmetic thing without her consent, and the receptionist was physically blocking the door until my mom paid. My mom asked if a check was ok, then made it out, and wrote EXTORTION on the for the line. They didn’t cash the check, and later sent her a postcard saying that they would no longer be able to provide services.
She found another dentist.
MeebleBlob
It wasn’t me! I swear, I didn’t draw these!
Actual bank teller here.
Some teenage kid brought in a check from his friend I’m guessing, as there were small hidden penises hidden throughout the writing of the check. Very tiny and could only be seen when looking closely.
Needless to say, the kid knew and was red-faced the entire transaction.
xKIL13Rx
I’ll take those 400 in one-dollar bills, please.
I once wrote my roommate a check for rent and put “Strippers and Coke” in the memo line. When he went to cash the $400 check, the teller looked at it and asked him with a completely straight face, if he would like that all in one-dollar bills.
LakeFlacid
Funny for the guy who writes it, unfortunate for the guy who gets it…
My friend made a bank transfer to another friend to pay for a recent holiday, only he put the reference as “Dildo refund”.
As amusing as this was, it was somewhat less amusing for the recipient of the money since he had to produce an up to date bank statement later that week, and this was the newest transaction
Arisutea
That is the smoothest way to pick up a girl I’ve ever seen.
I wrote “What’s your phone number?” on a check at the drive-thru one day and gave it to the teller I always flirted with. Saw her smile when she read it.
The receipt came back with her number written on it.
picksandchooses
Knowledge is power.
I lived with my ex for a long time who used Wells Fargo. I’d always write things like “child sacrifice ceremony” or draw a picture of a chicken. And just in case you guys are wondering, Wells Fargo will take checks that say, “FIFTY DOLLA BILLZ YALL” on the legal line.
acellular
Don’t stop for the workers who have to read these, please!
I work back-end fraud detection and you name it I’ve seen it on checks or Internet transactions between people. Thanks for last night, get checked for herpes, 2 black dildos, numerous drug references. I’ve found people are clever and it makes my day better so keep it up!
background_spider
Some wedding day savagery for you guys.
While opening the cards we received at our wedding, I discovered my ex-boyfriend had written a $500 check made out to my husband with “pain and suffering” in the memo
JessJHA
If your account is named ‘dolla dolla bill yall’, you’ve already won!
Bank teller here. I see “for sex”, “for the rash” that are kind of funny. But the funniest are the names people assign their accounts online such as “boob job”, “cash money”, “dolla dolla bill yall” which is hard to keep a straight face when you help people.
anon99161
If you want bonus points, just write any Game of Thrones reference on the memo line. It always works:
I’m going to start writing “A Lannister Always Pays his Debts” on my memo line.
Rocket92
No no no, it’s not THOSE kind of lessons, it’s another…more innocent kind!
My friend’s mother is Chinese, and when she’d fill out the weekly check for her son’s saxophone lessons, she’d write “sex lessons”…instead of SAX lessons. It wasn’t until many years later my friend pointed out her mistake…
oafie
Do not write checks while you are drunk; the results are often not pleasant.
I was extremely drunk while I wrote my friend a check, and looked at the scan of it from my bank website when he cashed some time later. In the ‘amount’ line:
‘TWO HUNDRED DOLLAZ’
Memo:
‘YOUR D; MY MOUTH’
JuhJuhJOHNNY
Sometimes, you just have to be completely honest on the memo line, like this:
I spent a summer doing data entry for a collections agency. I saw a bad check that said ‘I can’t believe you took a check from me’ on the line.
ContentedReader
Remember that it is very important to know not to cross the line, or there will be repercussions.
I once wrote “drug money” in the comment section of a PayPal transfer.
Damn was that a mistake. Both my account and the receiver’s account were instantly frozen. Had to go through hell and high water to get it unlocked.
quick_thinkfast
When your kids grow up to treat you just right:
I’m still on my parent’s cell phone family plan since it’s grandfathered into unlimited data. I have my bank set up to automatically send him a check every month for “The food I ate as a child”.
Cozmo23
Grandmother always knows best.
30 years old, huge guy. Had a check for 10 dollars that said “Happy Halloween love, Gma” in the for line. I thought it was funny and cute.
agirlintheworld
Babysitting is totally worth it when the mom writes checks like a boss:
I babysat a lot in college and grad school. One mom used to write “overlord duties” on my checks when I got paid.
courtneyhf
There are some that you just don’t even want to know the context of it.
My dad once got a check from a friend where the for line said “anal bleaching.”
fatwad1337
Roommates can be bothersome, but sometimes they are able to provide entertainment in even the dullest of circumstances:
My roommate always writes “A**hole tax” when he gives me a check.
runs_with_rum
This brings ‘Dad jokes’ to a whole new level. You can never escape them.
My dad likes to put ‘filial piety’ on checks he gives me.
avoidingmykids
Sometimes, you have to use the memo line to deliver the most savage of burns in all of history. Like such:
Alimony Check: “I got laid last night.”
Anonymous
It can’t be real…it has to be a joke…right?
My wife used to process checks for the corporate office of a payday lending /check cashing store. She had a check written out for $69.69 bounce back to her one day, and the memo line read “Bootay Call”.
shemp5150
Hopefully these weren’t going unnoticed.
My roommate and I write checks to each other for whenever one of us doesn’t have cash and the other one covers their half, to make sure we’re square on bills, stuff like that.
My favorites have always been “Narwhal farm” and “Bacon”. (The check for bacon was actually half of the rent, so that would’ve been funny to whoever read it.)
A sponge, deodorant, lightbulbs, lizard food, chicken wings (quite a few of these), beer and/or rum, dancing lessons, vacuum tubes, monopoly money, antimatter, elephants, illegal substances. (That last one was really just to see if anyone was even checking that line. Nobody called us out on it. Also the check was for under five dollars.) We also did “more checks”, “sunlight”, “oxygen tax”, and “socks”.
There were probably more, but that’s what I have on this register so far. Also, the address on our checks is wrong and we’re trying to use them up and then never use checks again… so it’s still a waste, but we really don’t care.
This is actually kind of sad.
My friend works at a bank, and we had a conversation about this recently. She said mostly it’s just horribly misspelled things. “Child Saport”, “Elektrisity”, the like.
It’s pretty important to get the name right on a check.
Sometimes, they can’t spell out the numbers. “Fitty/Fiddy,” “hunnerd,” “touzend,” or they write it in Spanish (which I usually wouldn’t take, “I don’t speak Spanish, I don’t know how much that check is worth”).
One guy was getting a payroll check made out to a different, yet similar, last name (think “Fernandez” instead of “Hernandez”). I wouldn’t cash that one either.
Some favor.
My sister watched my dogs for me one weekend and although I warned her, she left her medicine out and my poor puppy ate her vitamins and allergy pills. I had to pay to call animal poison control to find out how dangerous it was.
The check I gave her for watching the dogs said, “For trying to kill my dog.”
My kind of lawyer.
Not on the Memo line, but I have a customer who banks with us and on the header of the check it says her name and then, “Attorney at law and Ventriloquist.” Was a bit surprising the first time I saw it.
Sounds serious.
I work at a credit union. Back when Skyrim first came out, some guy brought in a check that said, “Removal of arrow from knee surgery.”
Very original.
One guy thought it was hilarious to write “for last night” in the Memo line… right in front of me. Probably thought I would be amused.
Harsh!
I gave my friend money for a shotgun. Memo: Malignant Child Removal
A good reason if I ever heard one.
We had a customer who would regularly cash her child support check from her ex-husband and the memo was always super scratched out. One day I asked about it and she said her ex-husband would write really obnoxious things like, “For my jerk of a kid” and that she scratched the line out so she wouldn’t have to see it.
Would’ve loved to see the teller’s face for that one!
I’m black and my white friend wrote “reparations” on my fantasy football winnings check. I thought that was pretty funny.
If you want the money, you have to accept the cheekiness.
My friend’s brother would help his mom out by giving her a check to pay some bills. He would give her $500 and in the Memo he’d write, “For bread and milk”. He also gave his brother one with the Memo of “Naked Bingo Contest Winner”.
I’m sure they love that.
Whenever I’m paying off a bet to a guy friend, I usually write “sensual massage” (I’m a guy).
There’s always a catch.
Not my personal story but part of family lore. One of my uncles is super rich. He’s a big time beverage distributor and he was building his dream house. He asked my aunt’s husband, a master carpenter, to come to a new house several states away to build him his own private Irish pub (it turned out amazing even though I don’t have pictures – sorry). Of course this process took months, with my aunt’s husband staying at the new house to continue the work. While building the house, my uncle felt badly that my aunt (his sister) had to be apart from her husband for so long so he calls and asks if he can send her money to make weekend trips here and there to see her husband. She’s thrilled by his generosity until she gets the first check. My uncle (with the house/Irish bar in progress) wrote “conjugal visit” in the Memo line. Of course she had to cash it to visit her husband. The bank teller laughed really hard when she did.
And that’s part of why my uncle is super rich – he’s the original troll and his employees, suppliers, customers, EVERYONE adores him. Easily one of the kindest and funniest guys I’ve ever known.
Note: Content has been edited for clarity.