A shower thought is that profound yet inconsequential consideration you have when the only thing you can do is sit and ponder the universe.
Enjoy.
Many thanks to all the Reddit users who shared their profound thoughts.
1. An hourglass has more moving parts than a complicated wristwatch.
TheOffendingHonda
2. The first time a stripper jumped out of a cake must have been the most legendary bachelor party.
Topcat73
3. If a naked woman wears sunglasses it’s like she’s wearing the opposite of a burqa.
saranaclake123
4. If you froze an egg and threw it through somebody’s window while they’re not in, they would come home to a broken window and a raw unscathed egg and wonder how the hell it happened…
georgeallenryan
5. Even if I agree with your bumper sticker 100%, I still think less of you for having a bumper sticker.
jonnubroth
6. As a child I pretended to like carrots for my parents. As an adult I pretend to like them for my child. I hate carrots.
Jalexgeorge
7. It’s off-putting that ( ) ( ) isn’t a palindrome, yet ( ) ) ( is.
feltch_my_beer
8. A really underrated accomplishment is that toilets don’t require power to flush.
salemlax23
More awesome shower thoughts on the next page!
9. When I was 14, I thought I was so cool because I hung out with 20 year olds. Now that I’ve grown up I’ve realized that they were weirdos for hanging out with me.
xandrenia
10. If I were approached by a person 4 feet taller and 10 times stronger than me, I’d be very uncomfortable. But toddlers are totally cool with it.
glitterphobia
11. When I was younger, I trusted my parents’ driving skills without a doubt. As an adult, riding with my parents terrifies me.
Henniferlopez87
12. Turning 18 would be a much bigger deal if it was impossible to lie about your age on the Internet.
New-Nostalgic-User
13. Wall-E is the kids version of a Black Mirror episode.
steventheunicorn
14. Drive-throughs that wont serve pedestrians are basically saying they have a strict dress code that requires you to wear a car.
yepyep1yepyep
15. Bill Nye is doing stupid detergent commercials, but I guarantee he could do a Kickstarter titled “Give me money so I don’t have to do stupid detergent commercials” and get at least a million bucks.
Porencephaly
16. Grocery stores in California charge $0.10 for 1 paper bag to discourage waste, but they mail everyone in the neighborhood paper junk mail without anyone asking for free.
J_JOA
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17. TED talks would be way shorter if people didn’t start clapping every 10 seconds.
cithus22
18. You know you’re getting older when you transition from not having enough money to buy games to not having enough time to play all the games you bought.
dori_lukey
19. In my life I’ve bought at least 20 pairs of nail clippers because I lost the last pair, but I never take them out of my house meaning there’s at least 19 places I haven’t seen in my own house.
KrixOfficial
20. Bill Gates is like a video game character who’s unlocked everything. All he can do now is self-imposed challenges like cure malaria to keep things interesting.
BornOnTheFourth
21. If I eat my meal from the frying pan at a restaurant, it’s sophisticated and a sign of quality. If I do it at home, I’m lazy and disgusting.
naraic42
22. Nerf darts cost more than most bullets do.
Thexthy
23. People are giving Lady Gaga a lot of credit for not lip-syncing, even though actually singing seems to me like it should be the bare-minimum expected of a performer…
AHighFifth
24. Just a thought. I see a lot of older people post that we survived lead paint, no seat belts, no helmets etc. You do understand there are people who didn’t right? That’s probably why they can’t post it on FB.
Jaddels
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25. Monopoly would be a lot more realistic if everyone started out with wildly different amounts of money.
fyhr100
26. There are millions of suits and dresses buried underground.
redbluegreen64
27. It’s annoying that when drinking hot chocolate, the marshmallows move away from my mouth but when drinking water the ice tries to force its way into my mouth.
PoisenStrenght
28. Actually making eye contact would be really gross.
shakeythirsty
29. Intentionally losing a game of rock paper scissors is just as hard as winning it.
Reapursouls
30. Going to the bathroom with your cellphone at work is this generation’s smoke break.
VladDracul_III
31. Someone cared about Butthead enough to pay for him to have braces.
planetsalic
32. If you pirate music or movies instead of buying a copy, then you’re a scumbag. If you read a book from the public library instead of buying a copy, then you’re a cultured part of your local community.
BadMoonRosin
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33. After March, there will be a whole generation of kids that know Emma Watson as Belle instead of Hermione.
team0bliterate
34. “14 minutes” and “16 minutes” both seem very specific, but “15 minutes” always seems like an estimate.
RamsesThePigeon
35. Never once have I written an email and thought, “I hope they know I sent this from my iPhone.”
TheRedditorPredator1
36. Tom Hanks is a terrible Captain. His spacecraft suffered catastrophic failure, his plane crashed, his ship was commandeered, and his combat unit was virtually wiped out.
tc_spears
37. According to supply and demand, the cost of milkshakes should be through the roof since the machine is always broken.
FLGFreak
38. Drinking alcohol to get drunk is just drinking poison in the right dose to mess you up but not kill you.
Rileysulman
39. There are over 100 billion dead people. If there is a skeleton war, the living don’t stand a chance.
NuclearCorpus
40. In college I used to line up my empty alcohol bottles as trophies. Now at age 35 they’re artifacts of shame.
campoanywhere
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41. The most disturbing thing about suddenly switching bodies with another human would be tasting the inside of their mouth.
FredTheBarber
42. In Scooby-Doo, every single mystery the gang ever encountered always had a logical explanation, and the only unexplainable thing was having a dog that could talk.
CrawlingBackToStart
43. The generation that said “we used to solve our problems on the playground with fists” is the same generation that complains about how much violence there is among kids…
DannyC724
44. If parents see me gaming, leave and come back an hour later and I am still playing, they will assume I was gaming the whole time. If parents see me studying, leave and come back another hour later and I am still studying, they will assume I was gaming the whole time.
kevinlovepie
45. If banks made 6 billion dollars from overdraft fees last year, then banks made 6 billion off of people who don’t have money.
ReefsnChicks
46. Dropping an ice cream cone as an adult is 10x sadder than as a kid because you personally paid for it.
B1naryB0t
47. In 20 years, kids will think the Amazon rainforest was named in honor of the online shopping website
hyprmatt
48. Never once have I been unwillingly redirected to the App Store and thought “Wow, I should totally download this app!”
MC_Labs15
49. I sincerely hope I live long enough to see “I am the kid who fell in Harambe’s enclosure, AMA.”
Debauchery_
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