Is there anything greater than having a piping hot pizza delivered to your doorstep? No, no there isn’t, and why anyone would ever be rude to a pizza delivery driver baffles me.
These Redditors shared stories of the times customers made them wonder why they were delivering pizzas in the first place. Next time you order pizza, you may feel like tipping your driver a little extra.
[Sources listed at the end of the article.]
A guy paid me a $10 bill for a $9.96 pizza. The change was four cents, so I already knew I wasn’t getting a tip. I told him I’d have to run back to my car to get some pennies.
He said, “I’ll wait.” When I brought the pennies he counted them one by one.
ryanpt670
A woman once asked me, while she was paying for her pizza, if I could fix her microwave. Seriously.
I was warned about her by the other drivers and they all said she tried to lure them into her home. I got the “she’s gonna take my skin” vibe so I didn’t go in.
Wrestlingisgood
In my first month delivering pizzas as an awkward teenager in suburban San Diego, I had a large order of 5 pizzas. I got to the right place, but all the lights inside were off. I got a bit scared. I had heard the stories of drivers getting robbed so instantly my mind goes to that. I walk slowly to the door and ring the bell.
After a few seconds I hear somebody behind the door ask, “How old are you?” I answered, “Pizza delivery…” Then I heard some muffled laughing. The woman again asks, “How OLD are you?” Reluctantly, I answer, “eighteen?”
The door opens slowly and a woman is standing there completely naked with her hands outstretched. My jaw must have hit the ground. Then a flash of light from a camera behind her and a room full of guys bursts into laughter. Turns out it was a bachelor party. I got a good laugh but never did see the pic that was taken.
Rebound91
This woman’s pizza was $14.98 total. When I gave her the pizza, she handed me $15 and with all seriousness said “keep the change for gas.” I just stared at her, said “thanks” and walked away.
meowitsmichelle
I once had a request for “a sexy shirtless hunk” to deliver the pizza. I couldn’t be further from hunk condition, but thought it’d be funny to take my shirt off when I arrived just as a goof.
A teenage girl opened the door. It was her birthday party. One of the most awkward moments of my life.
The_Him
I once had to fight a guy off after I delivered a pizza. He was very drunk and thought I was a taxi so he kept on trying to get in my car. I literally dragged him out of the passenger side and sped off into the night, passenger door open until the next hard right.
WadeWilsonforPope
Ugh, I am on the No Delivery list of 2 restaurants because my roommate can’t do math to save his life. Once, I was in the shower and later found out that he sent a driver away after a heated conversation with a negative-25 cent tip. Yep, you read that right.
The bill came to $20.25. He gave the guy $20 and thought it was a good tip because we ordered two sandwiches that were basically $7 a piece and a $1 soda for a total of $15, so $5 tip. In actuality, the sandwiches were $7.99 and the soda was $1.99, so $18 right there, then there was a $2.25 delivery fee. So $20.25.
Unfortunately, the delivery guy spoke almost zero English, so all he could say was “not enough” to my roommate, but my roommate refused to read the receipt. Finally the delivery guy gave up and took the $20.
Our roommate is no longer allowed to answer our door.
Anonymous
Not an FML moment, but I’ve been delivering for 2 years, and once there was this one little kid who answered the door for his mom. He was probably about 4. He brought the receipt into another room for his mom to sign.
When he brought it back signed, he said, “Here, my mom doesn’t tip so I will!” and he gave me this crumpled up dollar bill from his pocket.
ZenOfTheTeemo
I delivered for a while in college, and there were two “we don’t deliver there” neighborhoods. I actually had a friend who grew up in one of these neighborhoods and I knew it wasn’t actually that dangerous, so I was the one driver who delivered to these neighborhoods.
One time I was delivering to an apartment that was part of a triplex and some kid outside, probably like 5 or 6 years old, stuck his finger at me and said “This is a robbery! Give me your money!” I just chuckled and kept walking.
While I was giving the person their pizza I heard from behind me, “Cut that out! Don’t you know he’s the only one who delivers here?” Then as I was walking back to my car he was standing on the sidewalk (his mom several feet behind him) and said “Sorry.”
MyWordIsBond
When I worked at a pizza place, we just had one person that we wouldn’t deliver to because he would always refuse to pay and hassle the delivery guy, saying the pizza was cold, took too long, wasn’t the right order, whatever.
He probably got a couple free pizzas at least before we stopped bothering sending him anymore.
myheadfire
Apparently our entire complex is on the “do not deliver after dark” list at a local pizza place. That was encouraging to find out a week after moving in.
Isord
I used to deliver sandwiches for a shop. We had to blacklist this one lady who would call up last minute and demand 50-100 sandwiches for her meetings and she wanted them delivered in 15 mins. When it showed up 45 mins later than expected, she lost it, started causing a scene, not tipping, sending in complaints to the district manager, etc.
This happened so many times, and finally, one day, she called in an order for 200 sandwiches, wanted it in 15 mins. I delivered it myself and she took the sandwiches from me for her meeting. I sat there and waited for her to sign the receipt… and waited……… and waited.
Turns out, she took the sandwiches in to her meeting and booked it out through a back exit, then called her bank to cancel the charge. Suffice is to say we made sure the charge went through, and never delivered to her again.
Booner999
I worked at a Little Caesars when I was a teenager. On a really snowy night one of our drivers got into a terrible car accident on his way to deliver the pizza, and tragically lost his life.
The customer called in about an hour after we learned about the accident and started freaking out that his pizza hadn’t been delivered. When the manager explained the situation, he stated he didn’t care and wanted his pizza delivered for free.
Needless to say, he got an earful from my manager and then was put onto a no-serve list.
ashplecrisp
Our delivery store used to have woman who was just a complete racist, who would come in every so often or order delivery, and who did not want people of African-American descent to interact with her or her food at all.
One of our drivers, a really nice older African-American guy, delivered to her, and she actually slammed the door in his face. Another time, she walked out on a cashier after she swapped places with the white driver who was originally taking her carryout order. Finally, the manager put his foot down and told her not to come back or order from us ever again. He agreed afterwards he should have banned her from the beginning.
sharlayan
I used to be a delivery driver for a major pizza chain. I used to work the Sunday afternoon shifts and would have the same man, Alan, order a supreme pizza every week. I was always the one to deliver his order because most of the time I was the only driver on duty at that time of day. Alan was a nice, quiet man who had a lovely front porch.
One day, I didn’t take his delivery for some reason, and this new guy named Marvon did it instead. On that day, Alan decides to open the door stark naked. Alan wanted to show me (a small redheaded girl) the goods, not big tall Marvon. Alan never got another delivery.
AreNotOnFire
Whenever I delivered pizza to this elderly woman, she would pay exact change and then tip me in delicious pears from a tree in her backyard. Sadly, that only lasted until winter came and the pears went out of season.
Anonymous
There was an older man who suffered from dementia that would order four fountain drinks and nothing else from my shop, then would tip about $300 every time.
After hearing about it a couple times, I told my manager, and we all agreed to get in contact with his family, let them know we wouldn’t take orders from him, and that they’d have to take some measures to keep him from doing the same with other establishments. I can’t imagine how much money that guy gave away.
EnglishMajorRegret
We had a guy and two girls order separately, then grab the pizzas and run. It was a $100 order. My manager, who is a frequent gym-goer, leapt the counter and gave chase.
The two girls had gotten into a car with the food, but when the saw my manager they drove off, leaving the guy.
My manager chased him three blocks, and was gaining on the guy when the girls pulled up and the guy got into the car.
Unfortunately for them, one of our pizza chefs recognized them all from his high school and knew their names. After a few minutes of Google searching, we had their jobs, addresses, and Facebook accounts.
We contacted them all on Facebook, and got them to pay for the pizzas the next morning under threat of contacting police. We also put them on the no delivery list.
bend1310
I delivered pizza in NJ. I went on the porch to see a snarling Rottweiler behind the door. Not a big deal, happens a lot, I’m a stranger and the dog is just being a dog. The lady pushes him back, we do the pizza transaction and as I’m turning to go the lady turns and says, “Oh my god, he’s out…” I look towards the side door and see another angry-looking Rottweiler was charging around the house about to come on the porch.
I quickly opened the door to run inside but the lady screamed “No, the really bad one is inside” and I see an even-bigger Rottie just inside the hall. So I stick myself between the screen door and the real door and I’m trapped in an angry dog sandwich. I can only close the screen door so much, and the outside dog sinks its teeth my calf. Not much damage but I’m bleeding as she gets the dog under control.
Later that day, the manager goes to talk with the lady and Rotties are now penned up out back. As soon as the lady starts talking to him another small mutt dog zips out the door and bites him on the hand. He made the call on no more pizza for them.
jsnoots
I once took an order from a guy who wanted his pizza “crispy.” When I asked him how exactly he wanted the crust, he said, “If the crust ain’t black, I ain’t coming back.”
karter0
Prior to my freshman year of college, I was delivering pizzas for a large chain in a decent suburb outside of Cleveland. I was the typical stoner/partyer easygoing delivery guy.
One afternoon my manager requested I go to the bank to change several hundred dollars for smaller bills for our register. As I’m leaving the bank getting into my car, I feel a tap on my shoulder. It’s a dude with pantyhose on his head and a knife. He demands the money I have in my pocket and my keys, and I oblige. Afterwards the cops interrogate me and search the car, but my manager even vouched for me saying how I was a good kid and so I wasn’t held responsible.
Flash forward to about 10 years and I’m telling the story at a party and bam, it hits me. My manager, who often dated unsavory characters, set up the whole thing and stole the cash from the owner. Who else would know to rob me right then in broad daylight?
lancegreene
I delivered to the dorms when I was in college, back before credit cards could be used to pay for pizza. In the largest men’s dorm, we had a “war” with some of the residents after they got pissed when we wouldn’t accept an expired coupon for a 14-pizza order. So they kept calling us up with ghost orders and making life miserable for us over the course of a few weeks. As a result we blacklisted the whole dorm.
We were the cheapest pizza in town, and that did not go over well with them. The RAs got every student in that dorm together and told them to knock it off or they would get kicked out. We agreed to deliver again, but the same thing happened. So we banned that dorm forever.
It was cool by me because those cheapos would place 5-20 pizza orders and tip like $2.
Anonymous
One time I worked for this lady that owned a pizza shop in Atascadero, CA. She was super selfish and insulting to her employees, and no one ever worked there longer than a couple months. She didn’t have a “No Delivery” list but what she did have that was even worse was her own personal “Whitelist Delivery Book” that had EVERY single good tipper in the world on it, and that only she was allowed to read.
Example: Delivery boy gets back and goes, “Wow that guy tipped me 20 bucks!” Owner then writes down that order/name/number in her book. Next time that guy calls to order a pizza she doesn’t let anyone else deliver, she takes the delivery.
No one new knew this trick, and she just kept taking orders from all the newbies. I caught on after the first month or so, and after that I spent the next few months claiming that the HORRIBLE tippers, were AMAZING tippers. I would watch her go to these repeat customers and come back with a disgusted look on her face. I would ask her what’s wrong but she didn’t want to talk about it.
BruschiOnTap
Not a delivery driver but a frequent pizza orderer. In my old neighborhood, my house got put on a “deliver first” sort of list because we ordered so much and so often, and gave good tips.
Eventually, the pizza shop started recognizing our phone number when we called, and knew the address off by heart. Sometimes they’d even give us a discount at the door. We had a good thing going.
Fail_Panda