From some amazing “like a boss” moments to other situations where maybe the person should have given a damn, the following AskReddit thread is all about the most epic “I don’t give a damn” moments people have witnessed.
Source list available at the end.
A friend of mine was in an accident with a guy on a motorcycle. As she was turning, he came speeding around the corner and hit the back of her car. His bike broke into a million pieces. When she went out, he was laying on his back in the middle of the road. She ran over freaking out to see if he was okay, but he just put his index finger up to his helmet and shushed her, patted the ground, and told her to “sit and shush.” After she sat next to him, he pulled out a pack of cigarettes, opened his visor, lit one, and passed it to her. When the cops got there, they were both just laying in the middle of the street alternating puffs of the cigarette. Official statement: “We messed up, man. We messed up wicked bad.”
liv_free_or_die
There was a small bridge in my neighborhood with a clear sign that showed which side of the road had the right of way.
One day, cars were approaching from opposite sides, and for some odd reason, the drive coming from the wrong side felt like she had the right of way (for whatever imaginary reason, who knows). She stopped in the middle of the bridge, honked her horn, and gestured to the other car to reverse even though the sign clearly stated that he had the right of way.
The other driver did not even blink. He did not honk. He did not gesture. He just grabbed his newspaper beside him, opened it, and started to read.
The first driver fumed, hissed, and honked, but there was nothing she could do except for reverse and let the other driver pass. It was beautiful.
comicsnerd
At my local mall, there’s this store where all of the employees are notoriously helpful, so much so, that it has actually turned into a game to see if you can touch the back wall and get out before an employee approaches you. The workers know about it as well. So, it’s nearly impossible.
The only time I’ve seen someone do it was by full on sprinting through the crowded store, hands over their ears, screaming at the top of their lungs. He ended up having security called on him, but he did achieve “legendary status” in our friend group.
toptierhealbot
It was during rush hour traffic through a construction zone. This guy on the motorcycle in front of me was visibly irritated because we hadn’t moved in like 10 minutes. There was a cop car stuck in it as well. The motorcyclist said screw this, pulled out into someone’s driveway, and rode down the sidewalk. The cop put his lights on, but it was too jammed for anyone to move.
I see the guy get up to the intersection and hang a right. The cop tries to get out, but he just gives up and shuts his lights back off.
smokin_joe_
An obviously inebriated male passenger peeing down the aisle of a packed train carriage. When the train stopped at its destination, it looked like a game of Twister as people climbed over their seats to get out in order to avoid getting their shoes wet.
onthelevels
An elderly man was jaywalking and a car honked at him. He stopped, bonked the car hood with his cane, and waddled off.
JDogg_of_RS
I’m a pharmacist who used to work in a community store. I once had a pretty standard 80-year-old guy holler at me from one of the aisles asking for some help to pick up an over-the-counter medication.
I head over to ask him what’s going on. He says he’s had a rash in his groin area for about a week. As I’m asking him to describe it, he removes his suspenders, unzips his pants, and drops his trousers right there in the aisle to show me the rash (in case anyone was wondering, it looked like a typical mild fungal infection).
I offered to take him to a private counselling room to complete any further exam and he kindly said, “Dear, I have neither the time nor the inclination to move from this spot. What should I use?”
I picked out some antifungal cream. He got dressed again, thanked me for my time, and went happily on his way.
DolphinRx
It was about 10 o’clock at night in NYC. Across the street, one of those vendors with crappy jewelry on the table is getting screamed at by an angry customer. About 20 seconds into his tirade, the customer starts flipping and smashing the jewelry. I look to my left. There’s a middle aged guy in a suit with his bare foot balanced on a trash can trimming his toenails.
turingtested
A woman washed her son’s hands in one of those water fountains that we use to drink from.
Lucas_7777777
I was eating at a sit down fast food restaurant once, and this guy sits down at the table in front of me clearly frustrated. This restaurant has always been hit or miss with service, so right away I could tell that this guy was upset with the service he was receiving. The guy takes one bite, glances over at the people working all pissed off, takes his plate and tosses it into the air, and gets up and walks out. Food was everywhere, and the people working there walked over completely bewildered by what had just happened.
HiMyNameIsTomHanks
I saw some guy in McDonald’s eating a salad with his hands. There was dressing on it, too. He didn’t care.
princekeagan
There was a guy just outside of Stirling, Scotland that I would drive past many times around 5 pm. He sat on a bench with his earphones in, dancing away, singing at the top of his lungs. He was also a very dapper dresser, and he looked like he was having the time of his life.
Tweegyjambo
A long time ago, when I was in school, this kid would just play with himself under his desk. It was usually while we were doing math.
noss81
My buddy was eating at a fast food place. This teenage girl in a wheelchair comes in with her parents and has a total fit. They’re trying to order and the girl’s just being a nasty by screaming, rolling all over her parents, and just being plain rude to the employees. So, this old guy with these super thick glasses walks over and politely tries to calm the girl down by saying how everyone is doing their best and stuff, and the girl just yells at him too. The guy says he’s just trying to give his two cents and leaves the girl to be.
The girl and her parents get their food. As they’re on their way out, the girl rolls over to the old man and says sarcastically, “Nice glasses.” Without even straying from his calm demeanor the old man says, “Nice legs.”
TheWingedCherryPie
I once saw a guy essentially doing the dance routine from Footloose in a public setting and giving zero anythings if people were taking photos and/or laughing. He was just happy to have an audience. You go Footloose Franky!
SleeplessShitposter
I saw a guy on a bicycle get hit buy a car. He flew a few metres and barely missed getting hit by another car. Then, he got up, walked to his bike, and rode off before anyone could even offer to help.
Zorthax7
I saw a mother whose toddler was having a grand mal tantrum about not getting candy in the checkout aisle. This was literally a “threw himself on the floor kicking and screaming” kind of thing. She stiffened up and walked right out. She didn’t even say a word and just left him there.
Naturally, once he realized that she wasn’t paying him any attention… he stopped, got up, brushed himself off, and went out.
She is my hero.
gotham77
One time I saw a woman doing laundry in our building’s laundry room. Once she got all of her clothes into the machine, she began sniffing the shirt that she was wearing and decided to throw it in as well. She got completely undressed, tossed what she had on into the washing machine, and walked back to her apartment completely naked.
DEVOmay97
I used to work at a fast food restaurant, and we had a new employee. He was super chill, funny, but not the greatest worker.
So there was an elementary school with a basketball court nearby. We decided to shoot some hoops after work. This was around the middle of the day. We walked over to play a couple of games, and we were having fun.
Out of nowhere, the guy called a timeout and sat on the side. We assumed he was just out of breathe and tired. Nope, he pulled out a bag of drugs and casually did a line in front of us with a children’s baseball game going on right next to us. One of the parents ended up coming over and saying something to him. My coworker just said it wasn’t what it looked like, got up, and started playing again. You could totally tell he was on something by the way he was moving, acting, etc.
Needless to say, he didn’t work there for long. He got fired for coming into work on drugs.
cheesydot592
The other day I was sitting at a traffic light intersection. The light had turned red, and I saw a truck pulling a trailer zoom through the intersection. The guy clearly didn’t give a damn about his or the surrounding driver’s safety.
In_to_butt_stuff
They was this kid one summer who had his bicycle ran over by a huge truck. The guy had firefighter stickers all over his huge Ford, and the kid was like 13. They were at a snowball stand. He just casually walked into his truck, backed out over this kids bicycle, and pulled away with a grin, laughing.
That kid was me 7 years ago, and I still remember him.
Thomas5044
There was a kid in a crowded park this summer eating an ice cream cone that his mother had just bought him from a street vendor.
Before the boy could get to his first lick, a guy passing by grabbed his cone and ran off with it.
Back2Bach
Paramedic here. I found a patient in the middle of a public park naked and touching himself.
Me: “Hey, what’s going on tonight?”
Him: “Same old, same old. I just like to do a bunch of drugs and touch myself.”
IanMcKellenDegeneres
I work in a hospital. The amount of old man, low-hangin testicles I’ve seen is staggering. One time on rounds me and three other doctors were talking to a man sitting up in a chair. This guy had his whole package just out and proud with his legs spread open. Kinda had to focus on talking about this dude’s heart failure when you got that swingin in your view.
UptownShenanigans
When I lived in Japan, I was enjoying a latte with a friend of mine in Kichijoji. Out of nowhere, this guy rolls by in a full leather outfit on a bike. This wasn’t the “I don’t give a damn” part though. The strange part was that attached to his bike, trailing behind it, there was a little dais with a small dog on it. The dog was wearing a little black leather jacket with spikes and a tiny leather hat with studs. The guy just absolutely didn’t care about what anyone else thought.
DeadMoonKing
When I was a lifeguard in high school, I saved a 6-year-old girl from drowning. I swam out to her and pulled her safety back to the side of the pool. We got out and she pointed out where her mother was. We walked all the way over, and her mom never even got up and looked completely undisturbed by the events that had just unfolded.
KroneckerDelta1
I was at McDonald’s at 11pm with some friends. There was this guy there who was just going off on the girl at the counter. No matter how much cream she put in his coffee, it was still too black (because you know, those problems are definitely within her control… not). He then turned to his friend, who we didn’t even notice, and asked him to repeat his complaint to him. His friend was just casually sitting at a table with a pretty big bleeding gash on his face and said, calm as a cucumber, “This world is messed, man.” That became our motto.
SoNotTheCoolest
Posts are edited for clarity.