From giving personal medication to a friend with stomachache, to telling the entire class that Santa doesnt exist, people share the worst thing they unknowingly did as a child.
[Source can be found at the end of the article]
When I was about 8 I asked my dad if we could play “the naked man game.” My dad, trying not to panic, asked me what it was. I responded “it’s the one we play when [the babysitter] is over.” He then asked me to show him where the naked man game was, so I took him to the closet, opened the door, and pointed up to Operation.
He told me years later that he nearly had a heart attack.
I used to spend several weeks out of every summer staying with my aunt and uncle. I got to play with my cousin, and presumably my single father got to take a break. One year, on the day I was due to come home, I called and asked permission to stay another week, and he agreed. After I went home, a family friend told me they had been at my house the week before…for my surprise welcome home party. Dad bought a cake, decorated, and bbq’d. This was a man who did not entertain or demonstrate affection. True to character, he never told me about the party he attempted.
I don’t know if it’s the worst but I ruined my parents romantic anniversary.
I was around 7 and I woke up in the middle of the night because my stomach didn’t feel well. So I went upstairs to tell my parents.
When I opened their door I remember there were candles, music playing and when my mom saw me, she immediately pulled a blanket around herself.
She asked my what I was doing up and before I could even finish my sentence I projectile vomited all over everything.
I live within a half hour of the US/Canada border, Canadian side, and back in the 80s and 90s and earlier a lot of people would go over to the states to buy gas, beer, milk, etc. It was pretty much a Sunday tradition for us. One time when I was maybe 6 or 7 we were over there for the usual load of junk food etc, and my parents bought me a cap gun. We were coming back across the border where the agents ask the usual questions about where we were, what we’re bringing back. Dad listed off everything (except probably a lot of beer and tobacco, because smuggling that stuff was super easy back then), and when he finished I piped up in the backseat and say “And a gun!” somewhat proud of my new toy. Well, turns out that’s a sure fire way to get your car searched, and your dad busted for smuggling beer, who’d have known?
As a young little prankster, my favorite prank was to lock bathroom stall doors and then crawl underneath them and exit the scene.
One time, my parents dragged me to Costco with them. I went to the biggest stall in the back of the bathroom, locked it and scampered away with a grin. I ended up going back to the same Costco the next day because my parents had to return something. I went to the same stall and it was still locked, this time I actually had to use it. I crawled under the door only come face to face with an old guy looking at me like I was from another planet. I recoiled away so hard that I smacked my head on the bottom of the door and ran from that bathroom like I’d never run in my life. I crack myself up whenever I try to imagine what that guy was thinking when a 9-year-old tried to hijack his toilet.
I had a lot of medical issues as a child, and so we had a massive drawer full of my prescription meds. When I was nine years old, a friend from school came over to my house… we played for a while before she told me that she had a stomachache. I, knowing just how to help, gave her some of my medicine for a similar issue.
She got pretty sick, and I got a really long lecture about how we do not give our medications to other people.
I still feel bad about that one.
Accidentally pitchforked my neighbour in the head when I was about 7.
I was helping her (in her 70’s) do some gardening – planting flower beds etc. and we were just finishing up. I, in all my 7-year-old bravado, heft the pitchfork over my back to go and put it away, and accidentally catch her in the back of the head with it. She ended up going to the hospital needing stitches, but she forgave me.
When my cousin and I were 5-6, we got hooked on this amazing hot chocolate at this hotel. The hotel had a bar in the middle of the pool, so you can drink it while youre sitting in the water, which made it even cooler. Our parents told us we couldnt have more, so we went to a random couple and asked them to buy us the hot chocolate.
They did. And they babysat us until our parents found us, a few hours later. We didnt say anything about the hot chocolate since we didnt want to get in trouble, so the couple never got paid back.
Looking back, I think they were probably some honeymooning couple and we forced them to babysit two bratty kids.
I was at a birthday party, age 7, and there was this orange air freshener that smelled amazing. So, I sprayed it all over myself, and then I smelled really good. All the kids started spraying it on themselves. Not 20 minutes later, all of us are crying and screaming because our skin is burning and turning red. There was something very irritating in the air freshener.
I messed up two computer monitors back in after school daycare in kindergarten. There were these magnet toys that were laying around and for some reason I had put it up to the monitor and thought it was so cool how they made rainbow colors on the monitor. Me and a friend continued to do it until we both got yelled at and thats all I can remember. I dont remember what happened after that but Im pretty sure they stopped putting out the magnets.
When I was little I overheard my mom saying how my aunt chewed with her mouth open. Some time later my aunt is in the car with my mom, myself and my sister, and I proudly yell out how my mom says she chews with her mouth open. It was terribly awkward and Im glad I can only remember fragments of it.
I got a really bad burn on my arm while my dad was taking tea out of the microwave. I thought it would be really funny to slam the door on him while he was grabbing it. The result was a huge, and bad burn on my arm.
Cut to a while later, my arm was almost healed. But you could still see the burn in spots. I hit my head on a table and cut it open. My mom took me to the hospital to get stitches. Right when they were done stitching my head, I had the following exchange with the doctor.
Me: Oh! My other owie is almost gone!
Doctor: What other owie?
Me: From when my daddy poured hot tea on me.
That resulted in a very awkward conversation between my mother and the doctor. And the doctor almost calling CPS.
In kindergarten, I was the kid who blew the whistle on Santa Claus. I thought I was doing everyone a service, but several children cried and my mom had to talk to my teacher at pick-up time because I basically talked back when asked to apologize.
My mom was so embarrassed. The icing on the cake was when my mom told me in front of my teacher that I would in fact apologize to the class, I said “Dad says I shouldn’t say sorry unless I really mean it and I don’t think I should say sorry for telling the truth.”
I don’t even remember this but my mom tells this story all the time because I never apologized.
I put a canned Miller Lite in my Pikachu lunch box in the 2nd grade because I wanted to be the cool kid at the lunch table and impress my friends.
Unfortunately, my mom saw how shady I was acting protecting my lunchbox and ended up opening it. She was livid.
Up to this day, she still brings it up. Its basically the go-to story when I bring someone new to the house.
My uncle and his new wife came over to visit late one night when I was about 6. I was supposed to be in bed so the adults could enjoy visiting but I was determined to stay up and see what was going on.
I asked my mom in front of everybody if I could have a snack before bed, even though Id never had bedtime snacks. My mom was strict about eating right, so of course she said no and told me to go back to bed. I decided to make a scene and lay in the floor begging for food, saying I hadnt eaten in ages, that I was starving and asked for just one raisin. My new aunt watched, horrified, as my mom stayed firm and dragged me back to bed as I fake cried and begged her not to beat me. I was a very skinny child due to illness, so my aunt probably thought I really was being abused, but the truth is that I had good parents, I was just a little jerk sometimes.
When I was about 6 or 7, we went to Palm Springs on some vacation. This was ’98/99, when Pokemon was HUGE. My mom wanted to do some shopping and took me to a mall. One of the stores we went to was a book store. Well I was in luck: in this store they were selling The Pokemon Handbook that included Mew and Togepi, which the original handbook didn’t have. I showed it to my mom and begged her to buy it. However, considering I already had the original book, she said no. I was sad, but continued to look through it. Then we left the store and began doing window shopping on our way back to the rental car. The parking lot was all the way on the other side of the mall. When we finally got there I tried to open the car door but noticed I couldn’t: there was a book in my hand. I turned to my mom and showed her my accidental thievery. She looked at the book, then looked across the parking lot at the mall.
Mom decided it was too far to walk. I got my Pokemon book, and became the first successful thief in my family.
The worst one was taking my mothers “personal massager” to school for show and tell as I was a fairly literal child and that’s what it said on the packaging. It wasn’t obviously a marital aide as it was one of the more “bullet” options. However, my female teacher knew exactly what that was and took it away from me. She then called my mother to let her know, as delicately as possible, what I had taken to school.
It wasn’t until I was much older that I realized what I had done! My mother gets a good laugh out of that one though for sure!
I unknowingly broke my arm when I was four. My parents had no idea. I didn’t complain much even though it hurt a lot. I wound up carrying my arm around with the other arm. Parents noticed me doing this but didn’t know what to think. The break eventually healed this way and when I went for a check-up, the doctor informed my parents that I had broken my arm.
When I was in the 5th grade, I had a male teacher who was kind of weird and who basically let me and my friends get away with anything because we were smart. I was not smart enough to know that teasing my mom for said teacher’s crush on her would mean an all-out screaming match between her and my stepdad. This fight lasted for 5 more years. He thought she was cheating on him because I had said my teacher had a crush on her.
When I was around 3 or 4 years old, my family lived in a rented townhouse. We had a small dog that was not very well house-trained and would frequently defecate in the carpeted house.
Supposedly, my parents were planning to move and painstakingly cleaned the carpets to remove any evidence of the dog going to the bathroom in the house in order to get their security deposit back. Obviously being so young, no one clued me in on the situation.
On the day the landlord came to inspect the house I was playing outside in the yard. He stopped to say hello to me before knocking on the door and I allegedly said something to the effect of, Hi! My dog Frankie goes potty in the living room! The landlord immediately went inside and began ripping up the carpeting and saw all the stains underneath.
My parents did not get their security deposit back.
Up until I was around 6 or 7, whenever my family and I were heading out of a restaurant, and I noticed that my parents were forgetting cash on the table, I would always make sure to grab it and slip it back into my mom’s purse. I didn’t know tipping was a thing, and it’s not until I made a comment about how they were always leaving money lying around at restaurants, and how I always had to be the one to keep an eye out for it and make sure they didn’t forget it, that they realized what was going on. I learned about tipping that day and I cost a lot of waiters their tips.
I had just gotten home in the afternoon from middle school and there was about an hour or so I’d be home by myself before my parents came home from work. On this day, I decided to boil a few hot dogs as a nice little snack while I watched a movie.
Then my buddy from next door came over and invited me to play video games. An hour or so went by and I came back into my house and realized the stove was still on and the hot dogs were burning. Apparently the Teflon from the pan released a noxious gas that is lethal to birds and killed my mothers beloved parakeet. She came home about ten minutes later and immediately saw this dead parakeet and started crying. She looked me right in my eyes and said ‘everything in my life is dying!’ (this was around the same time my parents were getting divorced) and she slammed her bedroom door. I didn’t see her until the next morning.
When I was 7, I was in the family change room/locker room at a swimming pool when I noticed a stray thumb tack sitting on the ground under a bench. I didn’t know why it was there but some morbid curiosity told me to place it on the ground in the open with the pin side up. About 5 minutes later, I started to think about how dangerous that could be and went to go pick it up only to find this teenage girl sitting on the bench in severe pain and nursing her foot while her family was helping and inspecting it. The last thing I remember was the girl saying, “who would do this?”
I flooded my neighbors basement.
We lived in a duplex. I was 3 years old. The neighbor had our shared hose through his window to fill his water bed. I turned on the hose at the faucet then went to find the end. When I couldnt get the end out of the window, I turned the hose off.
But I was 3 years old. I didnt know my right and left yet, much less righty tighty, lefty loosy. I turned the faucet all the way on, exploded his water bed and flooded his basement.
So to be fair I was a nave kid (4-6) and didnt realize that things you say had weight sometimes . So during Christmas Eve I felt a stocking get put on my bed (family tradition Santa used to do) so being a child I looked up and saw my dad slowly creep out of my room so it was obvious on who put the stocking there. He didnt see me so I just went back to bed (I always had a suspicion Santa wasnt real in the first place so it didnt crush me) but I thought this was big news that everyone needed to hear.
Fast forward a couple of days and everyone in school is talking about what they got for Christmas. So our teacher asked what did everyone get for Christmas and me being the know it all said proudly Santa gave me a toy Light Saber! now that doesnt seem too bad. I was happy I got a light saber but then I said, I also saw my dad give me my presents so Santas not real and its our parents. I said this in front of my 2nd grade class and thought nothing of it. I didnt mean any harm to be done and I just thought it was a ground-breaking thing to expose Santa.
Long story short, my teacher talked to me about thinking before you talk and I didnt get into to much trouble but I sure do feel a little guilty looking back on it. Whenever I see my old classmates and know I might have crushed one of their childhood dreams of Santa, I die a little bit inside.
My parents told us we couldn’t play baseball in the front yard (maybe because we had broken the window out of our neighbors house the week before).
So, one evening, when I was about 12, my 11-year-old brother and I snuck out, around dusk with the aluminium bat and the baseball.
He threw me a batting practice pitch. I took a heroic swing and connected it solidly with my five year old foster brother’s teeth, who I didn’t know was behind me.
Needless to say, there is no lie that gets you out of that one. E.R. visit for him. His baby teeth detached a bit early, at least I hope they were baby teeth. I was grounded.
I went to a birthday party where I didn’t know anybody besides my parents. I think I was about 6 years old. A teenager noticed how bored and lonely I was, and took the time to play with me. I suggested stickball, but after grabbing a stick the only ball around was a rubber bouncy ball. He said it was fine and lobbed an easy one at me.
I ripped it straight at his face, and his glasses exploded in shards. I don’t remember much after that besides a lot of blood and some adults yelling. I got scared and ran off. Never heard of what happened or saw him again.
Ive always loved coffee even as a kid. My mom told me not to drink it because it would stunt my growth. One day when I was about 5 or 6 we were out and there was one of those canisters of coffee and I begged my mom to let me get some.
I got the same response I always got. Itll stunt your growth.
I looked to the line and noticed a little person. Is that what happened to her? Cue pointing and loud childs voice.
I didnt understand what I did for many years, but I still feel bad about to this day.