It seems as though online dating has gone from being the new ‘it thing’ to damn near the most prevalent way people meet one another. But just cause these initial interactions aren’t in person doesn’t mean there is any less room for instantaneous turn-offs.
The following AskRedditors responded to the question, “Women of Reddit, what are things men write on their dating profiles that are instant deal breakers?”
It looks like rapper Yo Gotti wasn’t kidding when he proclaimed that “it goes down in the DM’s” (direct messages).
If you’re interested in reading more responses take a look at the original thread at the end of the article.
“I’m an alpha male.”
Complaining about exes on the profile is a big deal breaker for me.
About me: “Just ask”
Likes: “I don’t know, lots of stuff lol”
Either that or “I’m a true gentleman just looking for a real lady.” Self-proclaimed gentlemen are usually damaged, doormats, or wish reality was like TV-1950s.
But the worst – the actual worst – only reveal them selves after you start messaging. The ones who make you carry the whole conversation. They never ask questions, even when they were the ones who initiated, and they give one-sentence answers. The worst.
Anything that insinuates you’re too good to be on [inserts dating site here]. If you were really too good for Tinder, you wouldn’t be on Tinder.
“I’m not trying to get hurt anymore. Seems like all the good guys get treated like trash. My last girlfriend was cheating on me so I’m a little insecure right now. Please don’t be one of these fake girls who’s just gonna hurt me and sleep with my friends behind my back”
Uhhhhhhh, your baggage is way too heavy. I can just picture getting back to back text messages round the clock if I don’t respond immediately and getting called out of my name if I want to go out with friends.
If I see “I can be your redneck Romeo” one more time.
Or “if I read your profile and like what I see, I may reply to your message”. Chill out there, Narcissist Ned.
This is a guy who messaged me about all the “red flags” on my profile. This is what he said:
You are probably boring so you should at least be able to have a conversation. I would rather talk on the phone than text so it’s sad that nobody here can hold a conversation. I know how chicks are on their phones.
Do not message me if you are not at least average in the looks department. Today alone I saw a chick who looked like Chris Farley and another that looked like Eggman. Do not message me if you’re highly attractive because I don’t deal with high maintenance women and I’m not your piggy bank. Do not message me if you have children, I refuse to raise somebody else’s children and again I am not your piggy bank.
Do not message me if you were promiscuous in the past. Shopping for a woman is like shopping for a car. Ideally, we all want a new one, but if you have to settle for a used one obviously you want the one with lower mileage.
You should probably be shorter than me. Also preferably younger. You do not have to be smart and actually I would prefer you weren’t because I want a woman who brings a different perspective to the table.
I am not looking for a woman who thinks she can boss me around. I am however looking for someone who is emotionally supportive and can help keep me in check when I lose my cool.
I like to get absorbed in projects and have a tendency to ignore you, so if you’re persistent in getting the attention you want that helps.
You can’t expect me to do everything for you. A relationship is a two-way street.
Don’t message me if you aren’t loyal. I’ll drop you instantly.
I’m not going to talk about myself. Do a little work to find out for yourself if you’re good for anything.
Blank profiles. Profiles that make it clear you are deeply full of yourself. Ones with shirtless mirror photos.
“My truck is the most important thing in the world” BYE.
Bad grammar. Saying you like to party as if that’s your favorite hobby. That weird review thing they do like “best guy ever – the times” or something.
“Looking for my queen”
Get out of here with that.
The shirtless picture of you in your bathroom mirror.
The group picture with no indication of who you are – I’ll assume you are the least attractive person in that picture and you are trying to use your more attractive friends to get me to click on your profile (frequently that seems to be the case). That irritates me since it feels like you are trying to pull a bait and switch.
“Fluent in sarcasm.” Translation – I’m not funny, but I’ve convinced myself that the reason nobody laughs at my jokes is that they’re just too intellectual and edgy for a mainstream audience.
I’m also put off by a huge wall of “favorites.” Maybe this isn’t as much of an issue in the Tinder age (I’ve been out of the game for a couple of years) but I used to see a ton of guys who would list, like, two hundred favorite movies or bands. It’s a good sign that he’s going to spend the whole date going on and on about things that you absolutely MUST see/ read/ listen to, and describing the plots of movies you’ve never seen in excruciating detail. It’s fun to get recommendations every now and again, but pop culture is no substitute for having your own personality.
I have no issue with peoples’ personal preference but that is just rude. If you are uninterested in large people just don’t talk or engage with those people.
Smoker or in an open relationship are my only “instant” deal-breakers.
I’m most turned off by men that have a very specific set of “rules” or “priorities. It makes it sound like they’re saying “this is the space in my life that you are expected to fill, don’t deviate from this”.
I was most attracted to a man that had a profile that described himself humbly and with humor. I was also very drawn to the profile picture with a big friendly smile. It felt like he was showing me his authentic self. Getting married next year.
“I just want someone who can hold an intelligent conversation.”
Every single guy I’ve come across that says this usually means “I want to talk about things I’m interested in and nothing else.”
Late to the party but I have seen SO many guys put things like “RIP Grandma 6.2.17”.
Yes, Tinder is totally the place to remember your deceased grandmother.
How about when they write “hope I’ve peeked your interest”. Nope nope nope.
“Who’s gonna be my ride or die.”
This is the male equivalent of “if you can’t handle me at my worst.”
When men list, “Making $$$”, under profession. I don’t understand are they printing out counterfeit bills?
*written with a corresponding emoji between each term*
‘God. family. ball. grind. gains. goals. hmu ;)’
Oh and for anyone who isn’t text language savvy, “hmu” stands for “hit me up.”
If you can’t even articulate that little about yourself…swipe left.
I’ve been seeing a lot of the word “sapiosexual” lately.
I get that it’s probably used with the best of intentions, but to me it comes across as pretentious.
When guys take a picture of themselves where the camera is angled upwards at their face from their lap.
Nothing is more unattractive than a guys sudden double chin and uninterested glare, it’s the worst angle for anyone! It’s not the best way to show off your face, guys.
When they write something prematurely passive aggressive like .. “6′ 2” … because apparently, it’s such a big deal.” Deal Breaker.