When someone does something hurtful, you have two choices: let it roll down your back or get sweet, sweet revenge. Read these stories of people who got the most detrimental revenge on those who crossed them:
Doggone Sweet Vengeance
“A neighbor who I never met accused me of trying to stab her dog through a double fence this winter. They have a wooden six-foot stockade fence surrounded by a four-foot chain link fence. The dog was injured on something in their backyard and required several stitches which resulted in a large vet bill that they couldn’t afford. They concocted the story that their ‘animal hating’ neighbor did this and began a fundraiser and raised quite a sum of money; way more than the bill was.
I had no idea about this whole drama until a friend in the police department told me of what this whacko was accusing me of. So once I found out I requested a copy of the police report where the neighbor stated that the dog was hurt in their yard; there wasn’t any blood or human footprints near the fence and I posted it to the fundraising site. She lost friends and reputation for $400!”
Don’t Prank The Ultimate Prankster
“I went on a bachelor weekend trip for a friend of mine with a group of guys from the wedding party. It wasn’t anything crazy with dancers or anything, but we did do some bar hopping. It was a Friday night, and I had gotten up for work around 4 a.m. that morning and was pretty beat by about 1 a.m., so I left the bar and went home a little earlier than everyone else.
We had filled the bathtub with ice and beverages and drank about half of what we purchased before heading to the bar. The reason I bring that up? I woke up completely covered in baby powder. It is caked in my eyes, nose, hair, ears, and mouth. My nose is dried out and so is my mouth. We were all supposed to head out on a fishing trip that morning at around 6 a.m.
So, without batting an eye (mostly because I couldn’t open them), I head right for the shower, which is full of our beverages, water and cardboard cases. I quickly take a cold shower and get all the stuff off and head to the boat. Only four out of the eight made it on the trip. Everyone is shocked with how well I am taking having been seriously antiqued. But, I simply ask a few questions and get the answers I need to hear and go about my day as if nothing happened.
Turns out, it was an old roommate of mine that did it to me. He was too messed up the night before to make it on the boat trip and is sleeping it off in the hotel room. So, the moment you’ve all been waiting for: the revenge.
While we were heading into the dock after a day of fishing, I filled a water bottle full of all the bait juice and little pieces of squid and raw bait fish. I filled the bottle to the brim. I was quiet about it and didn’t let anyone know what I was up to. We all made it back to the hotel, and I acted like I was heading back to my room. Instead, I went over to this guy’s car and proceeded to pour half the bottle down the AC vent underneath the windshield. But I wasn’t done there.
I went over to his room and knocked on the door. He opened it up and I calmly squirted half of what was left in his face. While he was squirming around and screaming, ‘What did you spray on me?!’ I sprayed his bag of clothes and then him one more time for good measure. Then I walked out of the door.
So, the best part? He cleaned everything up and ‘got over it.’ But he had no idea that his car had been filled with this juice and it was cooking in his ac vent for the next two days. When we went to drive home, he kept complaining to everyone that, ‘The smell just won’t go away.’ For two and a half hours in 90-degree weather, he blasted his AC with fish juice directly into his face.
He ended up selling the car a month later because ‘He just couldn’t get the smell out.'”
Her Pets Suddenly Became Jetsetters
“I had this mean neighbor a few years ago. She and her boyfriend always did random stuff to me and my stuff. Once she drew a picture of a man’s junk on my car with a sharpie, stole my garbage bins and hid them in her backyard. I’ve called the police on her many times, but she has connections there, so she was always let off. Then she killed my cat. He was an outdoor cat, and while he was chilling, she fed him rat poison. How do I know? She told me so. Apparently, he was ‘agitating’ her dogs so she killed him. Her dogs were fancy, top notch, $10,000-a-piece dogs. They were all show dogs and absolutely adorable.
So I took all three of them and gave them to various friends/family members. One is in Canada, one in the UK, and another in Japan. I didn’t think I’d get away with it, but she didn’t have any of those tracking microchips in her dogs, so I just took off the collar and they were mine.
I moved shortly after that, but apparently she’s still looking for them.”
An Event So Shocking It That Was Repeated “As Almost An Urban Myth”
“When I was in middle school, I got picked on a lot. I was that big kid who just did not stand up for himself. It usually started okay at every new school I went to until one kid would test me and see me not do anything about it, then it would spread like wildfire. Needless to say, I had a miserable time in middle school. It was the spring and at the time I was a part of the track team, being a bigger kid that meant throwing shot-put and discus.
There was this one fat kid named Eric, who wasn’t all too popular himself, and he had decided to earn some cred for himself and he started laying into me. I would snap back at him every time he insulted, but I didn’t want to take it past there and he knew this. The constant insults continued for weeks, every day after school, I had to stay for practice for a couple hours, and here was Eric constantly heckling me. One day, I decided I had enough and my mind was made up: I was either going to get the crap kicked out of me or I was going to demolish this kid.
Having never been in a fight before, I worked out how I wanted to do this for quite awhile in my head before beginning, meanwhile the whole time he just kept running his mouth. I was at the point between tears and blind rage as I was standing in the discus ring holding the discus and there was his fat ginger face cackling at me. I decided I would throw the discus at him and then charge. In my mind’s eye, I imagined that the discus would hit him in the arm or back, or possibly even get slapped away as I ran towards him, after all I tossed it underhanded like a frisbee, not what I thought had any force behind it.
NOPE! Instead, he just stood there, staring as the discus flew towards his face. I will never forget the sound/sight of when the discus made contact. I could hear his jaw shatter as heavy spirt of bloodshot from his face. Eric had braces and not only did the discus break his jaw, and burst straight through his bottom lip, but it also quickly dislodged most of his front teeth, sending his brace wires sprawling in all directing digging into the flesh of his cheeks and gums.
The amount of blood pouring from his face was nauseating, and all of a sudden the rage that had been building inside of me was gone and replaced by immense sadness for him. He took off running towards the coaches and I was right behind him. I couldn’t contain my crying as I followed step by step behind him, hearing the gargling wails and screams for help.
We were both ushered into the coach’s office quickly. I was too hysterical to answer any questions. The ambulance came and picked him up, and my overprotective and somewhat sociopathic older brother came and sheltered me from the barrage of incriminating questions coming from the coaches. As my brother grabbed me to pull me out of the room and take me home, the coach shoved past him and pushed me back into the chair stating that I wasn’t going anywhere. My brother turned around and knocked him out cold and we left.
Over the next few days, everyone kept their distance from me at school. The principal finally called me in and asked that I write a statement of what happened. I said it was an accident and that it slipped. Turns out the rest of the guys who were around had turned in statements saying the same thing, awhile later they confessed they thought Eric had it coming, and they were glad I had finally stood up for myself.
I don’t feel great about it, as an adult, it is one of the memories that haunt me. What makes it even worse, we moved that year and I ended up going to a different nearby high school in the same district. Freshman year at track practice the coach sat us down and told everyone my story as a cautionary tale of safety. I don’t think he knew it was me he was speaking about. Over the next few years, I would hear classmates and teachers and other people in the community repeat it as almost an urban myth. All the while I sat quietly knowing the true story because it was about me.”
Don’t Make This Kid Mad
“My brother has always been one of those evil geniuses thinking 10 steps ahead of everyone else.
In kindergarten, he went to a fancy private school and used to get picked on a lot for wearing glasses. The one time he actually fought back in self-defense, he got sent to the principal’s office and lost recess privileges for a week. This was in January. He held onto that resentment all year.
Fast forward to the last day of school. My brother consumes as much liquid as he possibly can, and then doesn’t use the bathroom all day. In the last hour of the day, he sneaks into the principal’s office and pees everywhere. We’re talking all four walls, floor, and ceiling.
Eventually, my brother gets caught. When the principal asked why he did it, he looks him straight in the eyes and says, ‘You pissed me off, so I pissed on you.’ And that’s how you get expelled from private school.”
Once It’s In The Yearbook, It’s There Forever
“This guy who used to be my best friend suddenly turned everyone against me in my high school because I (unknowingly) started dating the girl he liked. He put me through three years of torture. Well, senior quote time comes around, and I know the guy doesn’t care about that stuff, so I turned in some quotes for him myself.
They were all ‘quotes’ about him by his best friends that I totally made up, and they were all ambiguously gay. It was glorious. People were talking about it the rest of the year. He cried about it. No one knows it was me.”
Stooped To A New, Intimate Low
“There was a girl on the bus. We’ll call her ZB. ZB was not a nice person. She played truant all the time, but her dad was friends with the head, so she got off scot-free. She made fun of other kids, kept one guy on the ropes, and then webcammed herself fooling around with her boyfriend to him. She was just a mean girl in general.
So one day I was talking to my friends and made a silly joke about sleeping with someone (not including her), and she just chimed in with a comment about me being ‘out of my depth’ and cackled at my then teenage lack of a girlfriend. Just standard rude stuff. She does this twice more over the week. I was currently going through a depressive phase so I just felt down about it.
Then a few months later, a friend told me that she had got an abortion over the summer. At first, I was just bemused, then I realized what this meant. So I added her on MySpace as a generic hot guy and commented how cute she was. Naturally, she instantly added me.
So after a few days of playing charmer, I then proceeded to send her random pictures of aborted fetuses and damaged uteruses for about a week.
She quit school at the end of that term and left for good.”
Dirty Money Calls For Dirty Revenge
“This jerk laundered a ton of money. He embezzled money from a group of people he called his friends, then turned his back on that group of people. He bought his dream car with the dirty money. Too bad he didn’t use the money to buy a house first because, without a garage to protect his brand new car, it was all too easy to loosen the nut on the bottom of his oil pan.
Long story short, I took out the bolt about 90 percent of the way so that it still kept the plugin, but was loose enough to jerk free by hand. Then tied a bit of string to one of the wheels such that by the time he pulled out and drove away the string would have pulled the already loosened bolt out of the oil pan. The point was to drain his engine without his knowing; if I had drained his oil in the night, he might have seen the puddle when he got up in the morning and only been out a few liters of oil.
Final result? He cooked his engine and had to pay almost as much as the car was worth, to begin with, to have it replaced.
Moral of the story: don’t embezzle money from people who know where you live.”
“The Truth Works So Much Better”
“I posted links to the bondage website my ex-girlfriend did a few shoots with to online reviews of the legit business she ended up working for after getting her life straight.
Sounds pretty awful, huh? I still wish I hadn’t done it, but she had just tried to get me fired when she discovered I had ‘moved on’ by telling fabricated stories. I mean stories with no basis in truth. I have children. Trying to get me fired was evil. I texted after the posts with exactly this, ‘Telling lies to get people fired is lame, dude. The truth works so much better [link to her companies reviews].’
I really shouldn’t have, but I was angry and it felt like self-defense at the time.”
She Messed With The Wrong Employee
“It was my first job in retail, and I was close to the rest of the team. Some newcomers were hired for the summer, which gave us some healthy competition since we were on commission. One girl kept stealing everyone else’s sales, and when she was confronted, she didn’t care at all and continued taking everyone’s sales.
Our schedule was on paper, and it was everyone’s job to read their schedules properly for the following week. In the case you can’t physically come to the store to write your schedule, you have to call and speak to a manager to read out your schedule over the phone. Anyways, she ended up calling and didn’t ask for a manager to give her her schedule. I gave her all the wrong shifts, which followed by termination due to job abandonment (missing work three shifts in a row).”
A Truly Savage Form Of Revenge
“Several years back, a girlfriend of mine had come over to my house to bring me some leftovers from a big family holiday party they had held at her house. While she was there, I said I had to take out the garbage, and so she sat down to use my computer. She logged on to her messenger and messed around on the computer for a bit. I came back in and she told me she had to hurry and get home because of some family emergency so I walked her out to her car and kissed her goodbye. I went back upstairs and text messages to her phone were flashing all over my computer. She had forgotten to log out and her telecom service provider and the messenger company had an agreement where texts could be sent/received via the computer. I read message after message for seven hours.
From the one-sided content of the messages, I was able to ascertain that she was currently dating at least five different men and had actually left my house to go to one of her other boyfriend’s house to spend the night. I continued to treat myself to beverages and read the messages well into the night. At about 1 a.m., I went to the pay phone in front of my apartment and called the cell phone of the boyfriend at whose house she was staying. He answered groggily, and I asked him to pass the phone to her. She answered jokingly thinking that it was one of his friends, but suddenly was filled with shock and dismay when she recognized my voice. She accusingly went on the offensive asking me how I’d gotten the number and yelled at me for being so suspicious. She hung up and then wouldn’t answer either his phone or hers for the rest of the night. I continued to get bottles from the fridge before compiling all of the texts and associated phone numbers in a Word file. I then added all of the texts she had sent me and pictures from overseas trips we had taken together that were slightly risqué but proved beyond all doubt that we were actually engaged in an intimate relationship.
I wrote her a harsh e-mail about how her betrayal was duplicitous, and willfully cruel in nature and that she was worse than any street walker because at least in that profession all parties know all of the transactional costs of the relationship. She had met my mother, she had been a bridesmaid at another boyfriend’s little sister’s wedding and was discussing what furniture to buy after she got married to yet another boyfriend. I compiled all of this information and sent it to her, making sure to CC every person on her messenger list. All 70 of them. Her mother, father, sister, brother, friends, acquaintances, coworkers and all five boyfriends who had sent her texts that day. She became an urban legend among her friends, was forced to retreat from social life, cancel her phone and close all of her SNS and messenger accounts out of shame. I heard later that it became so bad that her parents had sent her overseas.
I got phone calls from the other boyfriends the next day requesting a meetup. Four of the five of us got together over drinks to compare notes and text messages and dates/schedules confirming that everything I had discovered was true. I vomited and shook with rage when I discovered what she was doing, but in retrospect, I am still amazed how fully she was able to manipulate and maintain five different, serious and long-term relationships simultaneously. The complexity astounds me. I worried for a time about legal ramifications, because we live in a country where slander laws can be applied severely (even in cases where the slander is true), but I never really regretted what I did. If I spared at least one other man the heartache, rage and trust issues I experienced, then it was worth it.”
“This Experience Has Destroyed My Life”
“I am a male in my late 20s who had been in a hetero relationship for two years that eventually blossomed into crazy love. I was foolish in the early stages and cheated on her with others who I viewed at the time to be accepting of my romantic preference as she didn’t know that I had an interest in not only women but also men. I eventually confessed to her at a rocky point in our relationship that I had gone behind her back. She was crushed that I had cheated, as was I, considering my naive mistakes in the past could possibly end the relationship with the first love of my life. I recognized my wrong-doings, admitted my faults, cleaned up my act and was 100 percent devoted to her afterwards. Yet, she regularly held my past faults against me. A little more than a year later, the relationship ended after all we did was yell at each other. We broke off contact with each other.
A few months later, I decided that I was done with women and went on a personals website seeking a relationship with another male. In the meantime, unbeknownst to me, she had been cyber-stalking me. She set up a fake email address, fake profile, fake pictures, fake Google voice number to text with, and even responded to my dating profile seeking a same-gender partner. Unaware it was her, we conversed back and forth via e-mail and text for two weeks and decided to set up a date. The next day, she copy-pasted all of our correspondence (and graphic photos I had shared with her along with the fake photos she sent to me) and forwarded it to 100 email addresses of my co-workers, family, and friends. After some internet sleuthing, I found out that it was her and upon confrontation, she insisted it was her mother.
This experience has destroyed my life. An incredibly deep depression has haunted me for the past two years that I have yet to recover from. I have developed horrible misogynistic beliefs that women are conniving and conspiring to ruin me. Paranoia stalks me at every corner. I have given up on finding a life partner since my only experience of love lead to the worst experience of my life. I shun social interaction as I fear that it will lead to the discussion of this event and I avoid meeting new people in fear that this will happen again.”
They Dug Their Own Graves
“When I caught my now ex-wife and now ex-best friend fooling around on my living room floor, I proceeded to beat the living daylights out of him. I threw him into the corner of our couch and broke his nose. At this point, my rage directed me to my wife; her look was a mixture of terror, confusion, and surprise. Choking her seemed the next path but before I went in, my morals against hitting women got a second wind, and I immediately left the house. As I left, I carried my now bleeding (broken nose) best friend out of the house, left him on the lawn, explained he had an hour to tell his pregnant wife what he was caught doing.
I left the house then, my wife tried following me.
Guess who got a charge for reckles driving not more than five minutes later. Yup, she did.
Just adding to this all, both my friend and I were military. Why is this relevant? Let’s just say adultery and charges like that, are highly frowned upon.
He ended up getting two non-judicial punishments, one for reckless driving, and one for adultery. His wife left him, took the kid they already had, and is keeping his new one ‘distanced’ from him.
For my ex-wife? She received the charge for her driving , which also messed up any prospect of joining the military also. Oh, and she lost me, I regard myself as quite a catch. Last I saw she was messing around with some low-rank loser who is in the process of getting kicked out. Good riddance.”