Sometimes, when you’ve been with someone for a long time, it’s easy to take what they do for granted and lose perspective. Maybe your partner does some of these, or maybe they should.
Many thanks to the Redditors who responded. You can check out more answers from the source at the end of this article.
1. Every morning, my wife of 18 years gets up before me and makes coffee. She doesn’t drink coffee.
Sandbocks
2. I guess this is a bit more planned maybe, but my husband suddenly passed away two months ago. We had been together for 7 years, married for almost 3, and right after we got married, I left to live in another state while I was in graduate school. We would see each other relatively frequently, it was obviously very hard on both of us to be apart, but we knew it would be temporary.
Right before he died, he was on a work trip across the country, and arranged his flight with his company so that he could stop and visit me over the weekend before he returned to work. I had no idea he was coming. He conspired with one of my good friends, who went through a whole lot of trouble to get me to go out with her when really I was going to go see him.
When I saw him at the bar I was totally speechless and so happy to see him. I had been going through a rough period, and he always took care of me and helped me deal with all of the stupidity that graduate school brings.
Unfortunately, the next day he got really sick, which led to a hospital stay for him, and two days later he died of an unrelated issue. It’s a giant mess right now and I miss him like crazy. But, the silver lining to all of this was that he was with me when he died.
rainedout
3. My wife loves pickles. They are her favorite food in the world. When she buys pickles, she buys two jars so that there is never the possibility of running out. If we run out of pickles, it is a BFD.
When we first started dating, back before I learned about her pickle obsession, I stole the last slice of pickle from her plate. I pulled the “HEY, What’s that over there?” and pointed wildly. YOINK. Pickle gone. She was LIVID. Absolutely furious that I had eaten the last pickle in the house. For WEEKS, every day she mentioned the pickle. Years passed, and she’d still make comments along the lines of “Well at least you didn’t eat the last pickle. OH WAIT.” etc.
It’s been 9 years since the pickle debacle . My wife, being 9 months pregnant has been having insane pickle cravings. Yesterday, she gave me the last slice of pickle in the house and said “I love you this much”.
timbit1985
4. He looks at me with googly eyes and says, “You’re so prettyyyy,” multiple times a day. We’ve been together for 9 years total, married for 2.
Also, the way we argue. He’s so considerate and thoughtful with his words, even when I know he’s incredibly frustrated.
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That speaks volumes about the way he respects me and loves me even when he’s angry with me.
I’ve learned to argue in the same way (but I’m less awesome at it than he is). He makes me a better person.
Anonymous
5. When he wakes up in the middle of the night and kisses me while still half asleep. That makes me feel like even when he’s semi-conscious he wants to show me he loves me.
Dilo_of_Vengeance
6. When he sneaks up behind me while I’m cooking or cleaning and kisses my neck.
When he takes random pictures of me when he thinks I’m not paying attention.
When he grabs my hand and gives me love in public, drives me crazy.
When he thinks I’m sleeping and cuddles up to me/holds me and tells me he loves me.
The way he looks at me when I get ready in the morning, and tells me I’m even more beautiful without the makeup.
The huge smile that appears on his face when I walk in the door.
If we’re walking around in public, he’ll pull me closer to him if people are checking me out.
ZombieTrash
7. The way he still looks at me. When I get out of the shower and there’s lunch waiting for me. How some nights he wakes up in the middle of the night and pulls me closer to him because I’ve moved too far away or even when he pulls me closer in all situations. How he lays in bed with me every morning even though he’d rather go sit on the couch and wake up. The sacrifices he makes for me everyday. That he tries his best to make sure I am smiling. He’s always there when I need him no matter the time or place. There are so many things that he does every day to let me know he loves me.
Ah. He is just..a perfect match for me. We have our rough times and we get frustrated with each other, but he always treats me with kindness, respect, and love no matter what mood he is in. We always make sure to communicate our problems and at the end of most days we go to bed with a smile on our faces.
Attollo
8. Before we were married, while riding in the car, my husband had this epiphany moment where he turned to me and said, “I f—–g love you.” with such conviction that I cracked up. It’s now become a thing with us.
MikesKitiKat
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9. When I’m stressed out and miserable because of my job, he always says “just quit. We’ll be okay,” when he knows full well that we need the money my job brings in. He’d rather have to scrape and scratch to pay the bills than see me unhappy.
And because I love him, I keep working.
DiffidentDissident
10. He always tries to give me the last bite of whatever we’re sharing, even if it’s insanely delicious. We also have tickle fights (I usually lose) and when I’m finally done giggling, he looks at me with this adoring face that makes me feel so loved.
scienceasfck
11. I seriously injured my back recently and he helps me do absolutely everything and expects nothing back. When I start to feel bad for needing him so much, he reassures me that he’s my husband and he loves helping me. “For better or for worse.” It means a lot.
babbidaboopy
12. I am a night owl and my bf usually goes to bed before me, but no matter how asleep he is, even if he was just snoring a second ago, no matter how quietly I say I love you, he always says I love you too. The way he rushes home from work, that he never leaves the house without giving me a kiss. That he tells people how even after 5 yrs, 3 of which we didn’t work and lived in the middle of nowhere (to write books) and saw each other & no one else sometimes for a week or more, that I’m still the most interesting person he has ever known.
lafemmeflaneuse
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13. Holding hands. Doesn’t matter if it’s at home or when we’re walking around, it’s a constant reminder.
marigold99
14. My girlfriend of three years complains whenever I rub my eyes. She tells me it’s going to make my eyelids really wrinkly when I’m older and she won’t like that.
It sounds silly but hearing her speak about us that far ahead makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside even if she is complaining about something as silly as me rubbing my eyes.
MistaClyde
15. I have a story about why I know my dog loves me.
Whenever I’m upset, she magically appears next to me and demands to play. If I’m sitting there sobbing, she’ll pull in my hair or pant leg and make me run to her toy bin and play a rousing game of tug o war.
She doesn’t have to do this, but she always makes my day better, and let’s me know when the world is against me, she’s still going to be there.
Anonymous
16. When he warms the sheets in the dryer and tucks me in when I’ve had an awful day.
When I’m in the tub and he just sits on the floor and hangs out with me because he wants to talk.
When I wake up and he’s already looking at me and smiling.
When he traces the freckles on my shoulders with his fingertips when I’m anxious.
When he brings me a glass of water every night before bed.
When he cleans the gross gunk that gets stuck in the kitchen sink (because it legitimately frightens me).
Whenever. I know he loves me. I am very lucky.
red_sharpie
17. Well I have PTSD and am 80% disabled, walk with a cane, and also have hearing aids now. I never used to be like this, but after two deployments this is my body.
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She still takes care of me, tells me she loves me, prepares my medicines, cooks my meals, and takes me to all of my appointments. Even though I’m not the exact same mans he married she is still here, and it’s all these small things that amaze me everyday.
RamboJebusJr
18. When we’re both cranky for silly or small reasons, but we’re cranky together, not at each other.
It reminds me we’re always partners, never adversaries.
Anonymous
19. I have been dating her for three years, and honestly no matter how mad I am at her, when she calls me Jamie Giraffe there’s no way I can be mad. It’s such a simple thing to be called a special nick name but its so special.
jamie_giraffe
20. I work fourteen hours on Saturday and Sunday. I hate the work, but it pays all of our bills, and there’s no way I’ll be able to find another job that pays me $250 for two days of work. I tend to complain about it to my husband at length, and he sympathizes. But I forget sometimes that it sucks for him too. He’s basically a single man for two days every week, I leave before he wakes up and come home when he’s going to bed.
On the days when he’s missed me a lot I’ll get home we’ll have dinner and watch tv and go to bed like it’s a normal night. But as soon as we get in bed it all sort of comes out. He’ll curl up around me in bed like a little kid and hold on so tight I almost can’t breath. He’ll stay there for twenty minutes sometimes, his head nestled into me, just holding on like I’m the best thing to ever wander into that apartment.
GhostlyGirl
21. Whenever I smile and she says “There’s that smile that I love so much” after I’ve been upset.
Even when her day has been terrible, she goes out of her way to make mine even better to balance it out.
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When she takes pictures of me making funny faces when she thinks I’m not paying attention.
When she looks into my eyes and tells me she loves me before we go to bed, and I can hear it in her voice.
I could never shower this woman with enough love and affection to show her how much I appreciate the little things she does for me, but that doesn’t stop me from trying.
kobrahawk1210
22. He’s the sort that would sleep all day if you let him, and I’m the type that gets out of bed and likes to get moving. So I usually shower/get ready for the day while I let him sleep. The look on his face when I wake him up every morning, just the pure, unadulterated love gets me every time.
He’s also a bit of a crazy driver, but if we ever have to make a hard stop, he immediately throws out his arm to keep me in my seat. I’m a fairly small person, and he’s a fairly tall one, and as a result he’s very protective of me, in little and big ways. Seeing that, and seeing him worrying about my safety makes me feel more loved than anything else in the world.
Anonymous
BONUS:
My husband and I are on the brink of divorce. One of the main reasons for this is that I often don’t feel loved, though he insists he loves me dearly. I have read the majority of this thread, and I have to say that what I’ve gained from it may have changed my thinking. A lot of what he does to show his love for me, which is similar to a lot of things mentioned in this thread, goes unnoticed because I didn’t see it that way. For this I am sorry. Reading this has helped me reframe a lot of what goes through my head. Thank you, Reddit.
Anonymous