It’s easy to lie to kids or trick them in various hilarious ways. They believe anything! In this article, people share the funniest lies they told kids to mess with them.
[Source can be found at the end of the article]
When I was first learning swear words, my parents made the mistake of telling me those were “words only mommys and daddys are allowed to say. So I was playing house with my sister and her friends, and I was the dad. I promptly went on a swearing tirade as the “dad” and got in big trouble…
regalternative
My dad said if I could look after a special growing rock, and watered it each day until it stopped growing I could get a dog. I’d water it and every week, while I was at school he’d replace it with a slightly bigger rock.
HenryTMoran
That, as their father, I could change their names whenever I wanted to.
One time I pretended to get on the phone with the “Arizona Name Registry”, and renamed my two kids Snargle and Gorf because they kept misbehaving.
They were bawling. I could barely keep a straight face.
NeroJoe
I was on a flight where a kid saw the button for calling a flight attendant, didn’t know what it was but clearly was thinking about pressing it, and so asked his Dad what it did. His Dad said it opens a trapdoor under your seat and drops you out of the bottom of the plane.
Afterwards, the kid spent the whole flight intrigued by the button, thinking about and talking about pushing it, but too worried to actually do it.
fromhouston
One time I was eating m&ms and my 3 year old nephew asked what was it, so I told him it was candy and when he asked for some I joked that it was vegetable flavored. The green m&ms were made out of lettuce, the red ones out of tomatoes, etc. He didn’t eat m&ms for the longest time and it was hard to convince him I was kidding because he started to believe we were tricking him into eating more vegetables.
smarii
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When we were in the car and it was raining, my mom would wait for a bridge or tunnel and as we approached it she would tell us she was going to make the rain stop in 3..2..1…
She told us she could only make the rain stop for a minute because it made her so tired. My siblings and I were convinced she was magic.
craftyqueer
My friends parents told her that moose weren’t real growing up. Like, unicorns, and moose were both fictional creatures. When she got to high school someone was talking about seeing a moose and she thought they were trying to be funny and basically she found out at 16 that moose are, in fact, real. When she went home to tell her parents her mom was in tears of laughter.
So yeah. Probably telling your kid growing up that a very existent animal is a fictional creature.
goatguyzer
My best friend’s mom told her this when we were little, and she covered her ears or took down her ponytail every time she lied until she was 8.
BlackLeftHand
I convinced my kids I was a Jedi. I waved my right hand to turn up the volume on my car while secretly using my left hand to turn up the volume with the steering wheel controls. I did the same thing with the electronic controls for my seat.
When they challenged me to do something else, I replied that I had already done too much because a Jedi should never use the Force for trivial things.
Wisco1856
When me and my brothers were kids and complained about something, my dad would go to the phone and say “Hello? Complaint department?” and describe our grievance.
He said the complaint department for everybody was in Calgary and was run by someone called Chief Owakanoake, and he was getting tired of our complaints.
I believed that for the longest time.
Bogaragaraga
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My sister told me that yellow leaves tasted like bananas and brown tasted like chocolate. I apparently went and ate leaves, but came back and told her they don’t taste how she said they would. She told me I must have eaten a bad batch… so I continued to try find and eat these tasty leaves.
12481624
My friend said he was once in the car with his family and they drove past an industrial plant. Smoke was billowing out of a chute, as they do at these plants. He asked his mom what it was and she told him it was the cloud factory and those were the clouds being released into the sky. He said he honestly thought clouds were man made for a better portion of his life.
Chosenone00
I told my 7 year old sister that if you lick your fingers and wipe it off in your ear you will have way better hearing and when she did it I talked a little louder and raised the volume on our tv when she wasn’t looking. She did this everyday till her teacher said that it wasn’t true.
Refinedkaos
As a child, my parents told me if I did something bad I was going to “baby jail”. I believed in baby jail until I was like 12 years old. If I started crying in a public place my dad would say “Mary, stop that. You don’t want to go to baby jail, do you?” And then I would just scream louder like “I don’t want to go to baby jail!” I was kind of a well behaved kid until I realized baby jail wasn’t real. Then I turned into a teenager and they told me that Juvenile Detention was a thing and I didn’t believe them.
alien4hire
My baby sister was 4 when I was 20. One day it was storming very hard, very loud lightning. Sister was terrified but eventually fell asleep. While she was napping I had to run out into the rain for a bit and was absolutely soaked. Maybe 10 minutes later it stopped raining and my sister woke up and saw me and asked why I was so wet. I said “well since you were so scared, I went and fought the storm. I won.” and pointed outside. She ran to look, saw it was clearing up and the utter awe in her face when she looked back at me… I was her hero for a day.
Kren_Dae
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I was at my friends and his 4-5 year old nephew was over and he stole my friends phone. So me thinking it would be funny go “Hey Brian, I’m gonna have to call the invisible cops on my invisible phone!” So he starts laughing saying no you won’t. And I pretend to hold my invisible phone up to my ear and go “Hello? Invisible cops? Ya Brian is stealing his uncles phone. Oh you’ll be here in 5 minutes to take him to invisible jail? Ok I’ll keep him here.” Immediately he starts freaking out crying.
Voiir
I tell mine that Abraham Lincoln was a vampire hunter. Then showed them the book and pictures from the movie. It is hilarious to watch them argue with people. I’ve heard family tell them there is no such thing as vampires. Their response? “Because Abraham killed them all, duh”. It’s great.
Obsessedgoose
I work in a giant dome theatre in a museum, so we see a lot of kids. For a while, we had a movie called Great White Shark. Whenever a kid asked if it was scary, I’d say no. The movie isn’t scary.
Now, when we fill the theatre up with water and release the live sharks, that’s scary.
eyes_are_grey
When my youngest was in infants school (aged 5-7), I could see his playground from our living room window, and when he came home from school I used to say things like “Did you have a good game of football after lunch today?” Or, “I saw you playing tag with Steven. He used to be amazed and I just used to say “Mums know everything. This lasted for a couple of years and now it’s a family joke but it’s changed to “Nana knows everything!
Purplescouser
My little sister used to get upset when I wouldn’t take her to PG-13 movies. I told her they were called PG-13 because only 13 people could see them at a time, and we were too late because the 13 people had already gone in.
Wilsondontstarve
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When my daughter was 4, she decided she really wanted a horse. I told her that since horses eat money, and I don’t earn all that much, we simply couldn’t get one.
She believed that horses actually ate money until she was 14. Then she called me a jerk.
In my defence, I have a cousin who has horses and given how much she spends on them, I’m convinced to this day that they do actually eat money…
playswithf1re
One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. Oh, no, I said, Disneyland burned down. He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.
pm_me_your_vudu_code
When I was little, I built a Lego remote control for the TV. My dad was like, hey, see if it will change the channel. I kept hitting it, nothing. All of a sudden, a few channels change and I’m screaming and jumping up and down. Then it stopped working. My dad goes “That was magic, awesome Lego remote!”
Thanks, Dad.
GarethCutestory
I remember that when I was 6, my dad once turned on the PC and made me play a game where it displays random pictures of random places, and a red dot appears in each pic, You had to click the red dots. He said “This game shows you what happens to the kids that browse the internet without their parents permission. After a while of clicking on the red dots, the face of the girl from the exorcist appears screaming on the computer screen, and I started crying and locked myself in the bathroom.
leafyfire
My father, may he rest in peace, had three toes amputated. When in public pools with kids around he would stick his foot out of the water and tell them a ”pool shark” got him.
You’ve never seen little kids literally run ON water to get out of the pool.
RabbiMarko
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My daughter was always a pretty gullible kid. So much so that family and friends frequently joke about it to this day. My ex husband and I were big film buffs and used to get her with movie lines. She got into trouble once in high school and we were so frustrated that we told her that she was on “double secret probation”. A few years later she watched Animal House with us for the first time. She turned around so fast, looked at her dad and I and yelled. Oh my God! THAT’S where that came from?? I hate you guys! We fell out laughing. Frankly, it cracks me up to this day if I mention it to her she laughs and says, “you suck, mom!”
Righteous_Redd
My mom would bring me and my sister to the mall with her while she shopped. Of course, being kids, we were bored out of our minds so we would hide in the clothes racks and play. My mom got annoyed with that because that made it hard for her to keep track of us. So she told us that the mannequins are actually kids that misbehaved. If the cameras caught us doing something other than standing close by her, we’d also turn into a mannequin.
It backfired on her. We ended up hiding in the clothes racks some more so that the cameras couldn’t see us.
kittencrumbs
I have two that my kids are still salty about.
The first was sitting them down when they were in 2nd and 4th grades and explaining I finally got permission from the school board to have them moved back two grades. Why? Because didn’t I tell them they were growing up too fast? Problem solved. Cue extensive crying and lots of “I don’t WANNA go back to 2nd grade/Kindergarten!!”
The second was about a year later. I told them I no longer had money to keep paying the school and it was time to let them know we didn’t actually live in Michigan, but lived in Australia. I’m really not sure why they were so terrified of living in Australia vs MI, but they were extremely unhappy. I let that one go for almost a day before fessing up we actually lived in MI.
Good times.
Evil-ish
I forget how it started, but my husband [boyfriend at the time] was trying to convince his 4 year-old brother that his feet were going to fall off. The lie got more and more elaborate—like explaining how he’d have to learn how to walk around on his ankles until his adult feet came in, etc. He was skeptical, even when I agreed that it was true, that everyone loses their baby feet before their adult feet grew in.
At the time their house was being upgraded from dial up internet to DSL, and the phone tech was wandering in and out. He happened to come in towards the end, and said, “Oh yeah, I remember when I lost my baby feet. Took a year for my new ones to come in.”
Little brother’s face fell immediately because it must be true if the stranger was corroborating. He ran out of the room to tell his mom, yelling, “But I like my feet!” and we all laughed. [Even his mom when she found out.] He’s an adult now and my husband and I still razz him about it when we see him.
pyradiesel
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