We all love a good "rags to riches" story, but what about when it goes the other way? People who grew up with wealth and the privilege it brings are used to a certain lifestyle... but if their wealth ever disappears, so does that lifestyle along with it.
These people responded to the Quora thread, "What does it feel like to go from being wealthy to being poor?" I've always wondered about this!
[Source listed at the end of the article.]
Regular Wash, Or Deluxe?

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“The global financial crisis destroyed me in 2008. The years immediately after were some of the worst years of my life. I lost everything; or at least I thought I did.
As it turns out, I didn’t lose much at all–assuming you don’t count approximately $3 million in real estate equity and a couple of hundred thousand dollars in cash, as ‘much.’
I was in Vegas when Lehman Brothers folded… It was my birthday … and it was the first time I’d ever lost big there. I should have known something wicked was coming, but I didn’t. So when my consulting contract didn’t get renewed, I didn’t panic. I kept doing business as usual. When my tenants defaulted on rent, I kept paying mortgages. A year later, I still had $50,000 plus in the bank… enough of a cushion.
I suppose at this time I should make you aware that I was not exactly a low-profile person. I was (and am) in luxury goods and hospitality, and I consulted with companies catering to high-net worth individuals. I helped them design sales and business strategies to keep their clients happy in the short and long term. Needless to say, the luxury sector was decimated by the financial crisis, and is still clawing its way out of the muck and mire, at least in the United States.
So, with enough money to float for six to ten months, I kept looking for work in my field.
And looking, and looking… nothing.
Any kind of business consulting… nothing. Six more months go by.
Any kind of sales… nothing. Six more months… this was where it got scary.
Waiting tables, bartending, limo driving, grocery bagging … ANYTHING!
Nope.
Bear in mind that up until this point, I had never even gone a month without a job since I was 12 years old.
My confidence was shot — I mean decimated. I was a shell of the man I had been only two years previously.
I felt like I had the stink of failure all over me.
A friend of mine owned a couple of car-washes. He offered me a job. It was outside work, taking orders when people drove in to the wash. ‘Would you like the undercarriage done?’
It was winter in Colorado.
I declined.
I was sharing a huge house at the time with my best buddy and his new girlfriend, who became his fiancé, and we were ALL broke. It was brutal. I don’t think I would have made it without them. I was depressed and miserable. I’m lucky they didn’t bury me in a snow bank and leave me there. I’m sure there were times they wanted to.
‘Cocky’ doesn’t do failure well.
My buddy with the car-wash called again a few weeks later. I said no again. Not just because of the embarrassment. Not just because of the cold weather and the elements, or standing on my feet for 10 hours a day on concrete without Wi-Fi.
It was because of my father.
I think a lot of good fathers have a catchphrase that they use to motivate their children to do better than he did. Typically, it’s the threat of being stuck doing any minimum-wage job that no teenager from the modern era of consumerism would ever aspire to. For some reason, the example that my father chose was ‘car wash.’ We’d go through Towne Auto Wash after Little League and he’d always point to that guy who asks, ‘Do you want a regular wash or deluxe?’ and then hands you that little piece of paper.
‘Mickey,’ He’d say. ‘You have to save some money,’ or ‘get better grades,’ or ‘quit chasing girls,’ or ‘do your homework.’ And then say, ‘You don’t want to end up like that guy, working in a car-wash, do you?’ The last time I heard the speech was around 1996. The words, however, hung in the air for years to come.
So, you can see my quandary. To me, working in a car-wash was the ultimate admission of failure. Not losing all my assets. Not selling my watches and cars. Not letting go of a few rugs and some art.
I was living with friends, driving a 17-year-old car, had less than $200 in the bank with no idea where the next $200 was coming from, and I was worried about being seen as a failure.
A little deluded?
Perhaps, but reality kicked in when I didn’t have money for a niece’s birthday present.
So I called my friend back and asked if I could still have the job at the car-wash. My utter failure as a human being was complete, my humiliation final. Or so I thought.
On my third day of dragging myself into work, the raven-haired stunner that I’d hired as my assistant five years previous pulled in — driving a brand new Lexus.
NOW my humiliation was complete.
There was nowhere to run, no place to hide.
And yet… just as I was about to die from shame, something happened that literally changed my life. She smiled, jumped out of her car, pointed her designer shoes right at me, ran over and gave me a hug. We chatted for about 10 minutes while her car was getting done. She said she was happy to see me, that I’d been a great boss, and that she was glad I was working. ‘Sooooo many’ of her friends–able-bodied twenty-somethings–were unemployed, and at least I wasn’t trapped behind a desk.
I realized that I’d been beating myself up needlessly, and saw how lucky I truly was.
In that instant, I decided that instead of just showing up until I could find something better, I would use all my skills to increase my friend’s business, and I did. Over the next few months, something amazing happened to me. Something I never saw coming, and something that impacted my life and made me a better man.
I saw hundreds of people every day and none of them thought I was a failure, and it energized me. I smiled. They smiled back. I was happy and engaging, and I sold a gazillion deluxe washes. But also, my worst fear morphed into something I started to look forward to. I got my confidence back, and it was obvious. I saw DOZENS of people I knew — clients, old customers, friends I’d lost touch with, and every single one of them said something positive.
They respected me.
They held me in higher esteem for seeing me in the cold, wearing a red nylon jacket with a car wash logo on it. Nobody made fun of me or called me names. Nobody laughed.
There was even an article in a local lifestyle magazine about me.
They respected me for doing what had to be done. I’m sure a few were secretly happy that I’d been taken down a few pegs … but hey, we’re all human, right?
The truth of my situation was laid bare for the world to see. There’s no way to spin a story when you are asking people if they want the basic or deluxe wash. There’s no amount of charm of polish or bullshit that can hide the truth.
I was working in a car wash — and nobody thought I was a failure. Not even my father.
Then, about 6 months later, one of my old clients called. He needed some help setting up a new luxury club. We put a deal together and when I resigned from the car-wash, my friend was genuinely sad, saying I was the best employee he’d ever had.
I approached that new consulting contract with a vigor and zest for life I hadn’t felt for years! A few months after that, another contract took me to Asia, and I’ve been consulting over here ever since.
So, my worst fear turned out to be my salvation.
It gave me confidence, paid my bills for a while and put me in a position to move my company to Asia and have access to an abundance of new cultures and growing markets.
Sure, I’m not quite back to where I was that day 9 years ago in Vegas, but I have a red nylon jacket with a car wash logo on it that reminds me that for my version of success, I don’t have to be.”
Humbled By The Tax Collectors

“This is the very short version of my story. When I was 18, I hit upon an idea which made me about £4 million by the time I was 21. Tragically, I was spending money like it was going out of fashion, and when the tax collectors decided they wanted their share, it actually wiped me out.
When the tax collectors had finished, I had £85, nowhere to live, and only the clothes I could carry. It was horrible, I felt like I was nothing. If it hadn’t been for the support of my partner and family, I would have gone off the deep end. I had never known what it was like to not have money and it was a very humbling 2 years until I picked myself back up.”
A Fresh Start

“Losing it all is one of the worst things that can happen, and one of the best things that can happen.
I lost multi-millions in saved wealth, a beachfront house, and a business generating mid-six figure profits every year after the Global Financial Crisis.
Like others have said, it was the darkest days of my life, not only for the tangible loss but for the loss in all faith in people. I lost faith in government oversight, justice, and the way society functions in general. My losses were due to fraudulent business people within publicly listed investment companies, and after it all washed out, billions were lost of mine and others’ money and only one person went to jail, which really didn’t matter as none of us got our money back. Also, in hindsight it became clear that the supposed oversight created to protect us investors was actually the secret portal for the investment managers to have carte blanche to do whatever they wanted with investors’ money, including personally paying themselves and leveraging to unrealistic levels to generate more fees.
The first reaction is failure and anger. Then fear, as you realize how hard it will be to ever get back to where you were. Then fear to even survive kicks in, as savings dwindle, no new prospects of work appear, and debts start to add up. Minor bills start falling late as you begin to try to balance the small money you have like a circus juggler. When the debt collectors start calling and showing up, it brings out the worst of the worst in life and you realize that your life has absolutely no value, is really only worth the $800 for that phone bill, or the $600 car payment, and the people chasing you for this money would not care if you were dead or alive as long as they get their small collection fee. You also realize how cruel the world of money is, and how the late fees and interest are between 30% and 50%. There is no protection for you from rapidly falling into the disaster zone.
The positive thing is, I developed an incredible empathy for those who struggle–a feeling I would not really consider when everything was going well. Our society values the rights of a $100 creditor over the life of a citizen, and it feels that any person who for whatever reason cannot pay a bill is the scum of the earth.
I learned that our society has a very, very unhealthy value and emphasis on money.
It has taken many years to try to get back on my feet and I still suffer from fear and anxiety, probably similar to a Depression-era survivor. I am not sure if I will ever catch up but I am trying and fighting every day. This is something that is hard, as it is almost impossible to relax and enjoy as it seems every action and decision is life or death.
I have to work so much harder and smarter now which has helped me to acquire new skills and hone my existing skills. I realize now that despite being in a low position wealth-wise, I am so much more skilled and knowledgeable than many of my peers who are getting paid salaries 1000% higher than I am, and I hope and trust that one day this will come to serve me well, as long as I keep at it.
Probably the hardest impact of the financial loss is how it impacted loved ones, my spouse, and children. To go from having it all to not, and not really understanding how it happened and not being in control of changing things was a huge burden on me, and many times led me to think life for them would be much better without me. However, I also thought I could be the solution, and what a great lesson that would be to overcome adversity and to succeed against all odds. This is one of my current drivers.
The benefit (I think and hope) is that my young adult children will have a much better understanding of the value of things, and what is really important, and not get sucked into the materialistic world that is so easy to fall into when life is easy and money is around. Hard work is valuable and the results and benefits from that hard work are much more enjoyable and lasting than easy money or daddy’s money.
Another benefit is that my wife and I now work together in our business, so she has grown in ways she never would have otherwise and discovered skills and abilities that have made her feel much better about herself. Our work has equipped her to be more helpful and supportive of our children and others. We also respect each other and understand each other so much better, and also know we have weathered a storm that would destroy most marriages, and have a solid foundation to take with us for the rest of our lives.
The world is corrupt and I am pretty sure it always will be, and most people are only looking out for their own interest. But by being aware of this, and not expecting anything different, a person gains more control over their life and can make choices in line with what really matters the most to them.
I would not wish this loss on anyone, as it is as dark as dark can be, but I also think that the lessons learned from it are ultimately worth more than the loss itself.
Would I like my money back…. sure…. but only with the life experiences, I have gained along the way. I see friends with so much money, whose pocket change could dramatically improve my situation–but they have nothing, and I know they never will, as they are so blind to so much about the reality and values of life.”
The Little Princess

“This is my life story.
‘I was born into old money, grew up with the new money, and now have no money.’
That line pretty much sums up my life.
I was born into a family that used to have everything: fame, power, and wealth… but at the wrong time. We had the old money status without the benefit. But if I can go back in time, I wouldn’t change a thing. I am proud to be a member of this family, rich or poor. People can take away almost everything my ancestors left, fame fades, and power can move from one hand to another. Wealth can be stolen–however, they can’t take away wisdom and inner strength. These things are in our blood, and will always be there.
After the US lifted the trade embargo against Vietnam, my parents worked hard to rebuild our family legacy. I was very lucky to grow up among the elite. I went to the best schools, ate the best food, wore the best clothes. Everybody was ‘nouveau riche,’ because before that nobody had money. At that time I thought life was good. I was wrong.
Like any perfect fairy tale, it did not last long. My father was falsely accused of a crime he did not commit. It didn’t take long for his business to fall apart. Building a business in Vietnam is like having a beautiful sand castle: it never lasts. Many years later, my father won the lawsuit, but he had already lost everything. Everyone who used to be our friends and family acted like they didn’t even know us.
When you have money, your friends know who you are. When you have no money, you know who your friends are.
My mother wanted to go back to the Western world and rebuild our lives. My father wanted to rebuild his legacy where he lost it. Just like a famous Vietnamese legend, my mother took my litter sister and me to the ‘North,’ to Canada where her family lives. Meanwhile, my father took $1000 to the ‘South,’ in this case to Southern Vietnam, and rebuilt his businesses.
In Vietnam, everyone thinks North America is heaven, but sadly in reality it’s the opposite.
Starting a life in a new country is hard, but starting a new life with nothing is much harder.
I was a spoiled brat who grew up with a maid and had never had to touch a single thing in my life. Instead of a big new house with a library and playroom, we lived in a 150 square foot room in a hundred-year-old home. I had to learn to take care of myself and help my mother raise my little sister. It was like Sara Crewe’s life in ‘The Little Princess.’ This princess became a pauper overnight.
I went to school, but I could not understand a single word. None of the other kids wanted to have anything to do with me. Later on I found out they were making fun of me. I did not want to bother my mother with this because she had enough on her plate. I thought this cold land was better than my home, but nobody really wanted me.
On a cold day in the middle of February, I was on my way to class when a stranger looked at me and smiled. It was the first time I saw someone smiling at me in a long time. It felt genuine to me. It made me believe that my life will get better. I will never forget that lady and her smile. That moment changed my life.
From that day on, I promised myself I would always smile and treat everyone I met like they were family.”
From Paradise To Boarding School

“I grew up in paradise in Spain: to give you an idea, there were twelve or thirteen (I feel like I’m forgetting one) cars in the driveway. We had muscle cars, sports cars, you name it at one point or other. If it was a cool car, one of them probably sat in our driveway.
We lived in a sprawling villa, on an estate of approximately 700 square miles, with 360° views of the sea, and the mountains. It was truly paradise.
My father captained Sweden’s largest sailing vessel. She didn’t stay Swedish for long, as she was soon under a Spanish flag, thus leading us to our Spanish villa.
My mother ran a hotel painted by a local artist, with palm trees and beach scenes in the front.
I went to private school and brought home pretty much any animal imaginable: ferrets, rabbits, chickens, dogs, horses… it didn’t matter, we had a family of helpers living in the tower who waited on us hand and foot.
I was known as the ‘spoiled kid’ throughout my school years in not just my class but all classes. Literally everyone knew who we were. My dad would pick me up in a different car every day: depending on his mood, it might have been the wine-red Monte Carlo that could barely traverse half our mountain village because it was so wide; or it could be the V12 XJS Jaguar, a convertible with the top down, and the dogs chilling in the back. Mum picked me up on her race horse a couple of times–she was retired (the horse, not mum).
We were a wild family, both on the surface, and at home.
I was always told I’d be a millionaire the day I turned 18. I didn’t quite grasp that we were ‘rich’ until the divorce started…
The divorce. Wow.
We lost it all, because my parents were ‘unable’ to speak to each other if not through lawyers. Expensive lawyers. For 10 years they didn’t speak, until I disappeared in a war zone for 10 days (but that’s a story for another time). The divorce was known on the coast as the ‘circus show’ and was quite a spectacle every time they appeared in court.
Anyway, the sheer stress and depression that the hate caused was too much to take, and it led them to both make awful monetary decisions.
At 16, I was shipped off from my horses and paradise villa to an island not far off Gothenburg in Sweden.
I’d never lived in an apartment, and the other teenagers quite literally thought I was telling fibs when I disclosed anything about my family… so I shut up, and began isolating myself.
Anyway, sure, I’m depressed and I dream of that house and I cry for my home… but, it’s not the riches I miss, it’s the happy-go-lucky times with my family. I desperately want those family times to come back. I wish we all were as happy as when we were rich.
So, how does it feel to go from being rich to poor? Pretty awful, when it means you lost your family in the process.
Lessons Learned

“Going from wealth to having nothing feels like you are the biggest loser in the world. It has happened to me 2 different times, and while I could easily blame ‘outside’ reasons, the real reason was that I didn’t plan for such potential catastrophes and thought myself to be invincible.
It is embarrassing. You don’t want to go out because you think you ‘know’ everyone is laughing at you behind your back. You want to just hide out and become a recluse. For me, in both cases, the losses were sudden and huge. However, I must admit that these events made all the difference in my 3rd climb up the ladder and here is why:
1. You realize who your true friends are.
2. You also realize that you better make a bunch more of those on your way back up, because you need their support.
3. You quit throwing money away by chasing multiple things at one time and focus on what you can do best.
4. You learn not to ‘waste’ your time working every minute and have ‘outside’ fun sometimes. You will be shocked at how many new contacts and friends you will make if you don’t spend every waking moment at work, no matter how much you love it. It was because I was broke that I built my current empire (for the lack of a better term) because I was able to see a different side of life.
5. Most important is that you learn that sometimes, you just can’t control everything, no matter what you do. Armed with that knowledge, you will realize that you are NOT invincible and prepare accordingly.
6. I also do not live a wealthy lifestyle now even though I make a LOT more money than I ever have and my net worth is 10 times larger than at my peak before the last collapse, which was in 2005.
Could it happen again? Yes. But it’s a lot less likely.
Would people laugh at me behind my back? Maybe. That’s what haters do, right?
Does it matter? No, because my previous failures have taught me so much. The next time I would have to climb out of the hole, it would be even easier because of the people (friends and family) with whom I have surrounded myself.”
These comments have been edited for clarity.