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People Share Their Most Absurd “I Woke Up For This?” Moments

By Stephen M.
January 19, 2018
Shutterstock / Tom Harper Photography

Sleep can easily be the absolute best part of a day. After eight or more hours of stress at work, a day of chores in the yard, or a spell of sadness, our beds are sometimes the only way that were able to unwind and recharge.

Thats exactly why its so infuriating to be woken up for a pointless reason. These Reddit users shared their personal stories.


When I was married, my job would sometimes take me all over the country for a week or two. One night I was in Seattle, wife was back home in Pittsburgh. She called me at 4 a.m. my time to tell me my dog had chewed up her new heels and pooped in the house. Like, what do you want me to do? Talk to him over the phone?

– 5meterhammer

Honey, I think my water just broke.

– ncwindbag

My neighbor called me at 2 a.m.; half asleep, I ignored the call, only to be waken up again to a loud banging on my door. I wake up and its her asking if she could borrow some eggs so she could make brownies…..

– CrazyWhoDatXLIV


A fireman coming through my bedroom window because my building was on fire.

– rubywings


My dad woke me up in high school at 11:30 p.m. to take the trash out.

– ThatGuy2300

What does that even mean—too busy?! Im too busy sleeping!

– jliv60

My mother once kicked in my door at six in the morning because my brother left a kitchen cabinet open.

– EMTbacon


– poppunkid

My mom screaming bloody murder because there was an opossum in the garbage can outside. So naturally, she asked me to get it out. I was expecting there to be this giant monster of a thing with big teeth, ready to jump up and bite my face off. Opened the can and came face to face with a little poof. It was just a baby opossum. I guess he fell into the garbage and we closed it on him. I just gently tipped the can on its side and he waddled out, perfectly fine. Probably living a nice opossum life now.

– HolyHabenula


I woke to my dad bursting into my room, and before I knew it I, was hanging out of my window with my dad holding my ankles. My giant cat broke the screen she was leaning against and made her way on to the roof.

– deny_the_issue

My girlfriend woke me up around 3 a.m. crying inconsolably. Thinking the worst, I calmed her down for around 20 minutes until she could explain what happened… Shed watched a video of a deer that couldn’t walk very easily in a blizzard.

– Squirrleyd

I was woken up by my mother to beat a level in a Shrek game on Xbox for my brothers, because they were fighting over it so much.

– na_tica

Four guys with ski masks, hammers, and knives smashing our windows in and trying to climb into our house.

– Micrograph


Woke up to the crunching of tiny bird bones in my cats mouth.

– 1tsa13x

Kids woke me up to tell me uncle was drunk and abusive. I went downstairs to find he had driven his motorcycle in the front door and was starting to do burnouts on my carpet.

– Down_To_My_Last_Fvck

A hedgehog had crawled in through the dog flap and was cowering in a corner in the kitchen with the dog growling at it. I was woken up to get rid of it.

– greenwood90

At about 3 a.m., my husband rushes into the room like the house is on fire—I ask what’s wrong? He says, Oh nothing, I just wanted to see if you would make me a grilled cheese sandwich. I like the way you get the bread crispy.

– Frisky2Risky

I was awoken at 3 a.m. by my cat having loudly explosive diarrhea on my bedroom floor. I believe it was the fart sounds that woke me, and then the smell hit me like a ton of bricks—then I had to clean it.

– leslieleanor

I didnt go to bed until 2 a.m. and my dad woke me up at 3 a.m. to go to a Black Friday sale. He needed two things and it was only one per person.

– Pizzalover1011

I woke up to a cop poking his head through my bedroom door. My roommate had been smoking weed and decided to open the door without checking first. She was arrested.

– BatteredRose92

My mother woke me up because I forgot to say goodnight to her.

– mesuzume

My dog started peeing on my pillow right next to my head, so I woke up to a warm liquid dripping down my neck.

– alicewonder8

I was awoken by a loud bang, only to find that a car had crashed into my sister’s bedroom. Nobody got hurt, thankfully.

– anotherdyingpotato

I got a guinea pig from the pet store two days prior. I woke up to another baby guinea pig in the cage and lots of squealing.

– Ihax4u

My buddy ran out of gas and happened to be within earshot of my house. I had a gallon of gas. Walked over, filled him up, then went back to bed.

– mean_ass_raccoon

Some kid in high school who I didn’t even like called me to ask what to do to get away from the cops.

– bigdogeatsmyass

Our entire basement flooded ankle deep with poop water. I was 12 and very angry at my parents when they woke me up at 2 a.m. to help them do chores. I was even madder when I realized what chore I was about to do.

– humma__kavula

My uncle once called me to have me pick him up and drive him to the hospital. Earlier that day, hed decided that he was special and could weld without a welding mask on. He was just beginning to feel the pain from his burnt corneas.

– BreakfastLover92

I was woken up by my four-year-old in the middle of the night. He was saying I don’t feel good… just before I sat up, he vomited on me. He’d had chocolate milk before bedtime, so I was covered in hot milk chunks.

– Queenunderthehill

Myself. Vomiting profusely on the wall.

– muppetitty

A bat in my house. Great thing to wake up to!

– idk66666

I was woken up by raining in my apartment… The upstairs neighbors washing machine broke and water was flooding through the vents and light fixtures.

– sparkyman612

One time, my cat knocked over and broke a glass of water. It fell right on my laptop that was sitting on the floor. It was three in the morning.

– pawesome-aw

A girl put three bags of popcorn in a microwave in the dorm’s common room on the first floor—it caught on fire at 3 a.m.

– otterwolfy

Article Source

Some of this material has been edited for clarity.

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